Dear Silent2024~
Welcome here to the Forum. It was a good move on your part as if you look around I think you will find others in similar circumstances.
It is horrible to be the one left at home, looking after kids who are getting independent, and not being included in your husband's life. As someone who sounds as if they valued being with friends all around life must now seem very silent. Many people would feel as you and wonder what there is in life for them.
Can I ask if you have talked this over with your husband, and if so what he thought? It can be the sort of problem two people can work at.
When I was invalided out of my very busy job job I ended up alone apart from a family who worked, so had little to do and often was just alone, feeling life was pointless.
I never found the secret of actively seeking friendship, and al from work were no longer there. While people became acquaintances there was little to draw us togehter. Instead I found that by doing something worth doing for itself, in my case study and volunteering I had occupation plus met many people, of whom one or two clicked, and we became friends.
So friendship came, but as a by-product if you like, to occupation, and occupation helped to fill an empty life.
May I ask if you have had interests the past, anything - from painting to walking - that you could take up again?
May I also suggest that if life is so barren and you are so down as a result it is only the kids you stay for then it would be a good idea to seek assistance. You may then cope better and not feel life so pointless.
I had help from places like Lifeline and the Suicide Call Back Service (both of whom are there for people like us) when getting overwhelmed by it all. Than a GP and a psych, and over time it made me want to go on, and now am in a pretty good place.
When feeling down it is very hard to summon up enough energy and motivation to try something new. It does help though and at least in my case was well worth it.
You know you will be welcome here any time
Croix
