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I’m sad, I’m not sure why.
I feel like have like this weight on my shoulders, pushing me down and I just don’t know when I can get back up or if I’ll go back up. I feel stuck feel selfish because I can’t think of Australia anything that’s wrong with my life and that’s a trigger in itself, I know I come from a place of privilege being a white woman in society who is never had to worry because my family is always had a roof over their head, but I’m just sad. I have such low energy support worker for people disabilities and I’m working part time currently I’m studying every Monday and I’ve lost hours at work because I was taking too many days off because I felt like I couldn’t even get out of bed and make up excuses and work keep telling me how much they they love the work that I do as a support worker and they would hate to lose me and I want to check in with me and make sure that I’m okay and I’ve offered support in. Anyway they can my partner of six years him just lost his pop I knew him guess it brings up the feelings of the loss ofmy Nan 💕 a bit, I lost her when I was younger and I know I feel often like I lost her before I could even get to know her so I guess there is an element of pain there.
I’m so so confused about my sexuality as well I have no shame in it, but I’m just confused , I feel like a lot of people at 22 would have a label for understanding of who they are, but I have no idea and I’m always the one that’s like I don’t need no labels. Idk why but right now my emotions just feel like the biggest mystery in my own life.
My heart goes out to you as you struggle so greatly with what I'd have to say can be 2 of the greatest challenges in life, 1) coming to know who you naturally are and 2) feeling your way through life. Both can be far from easy, no matter what stage or age we're at.
As a 52yo gal, I'm still figuring it out myself - who I naturally am, as opposed to who people expect me to be or would like me to be, and how to use my feelings as a compass. One of the revelations along the way involved understanding I was never taught how to do either. The learn as you go method is extremely testing at times but you do graduate up through levels of self understanding and that's something to be proud of.
With the feeling emotions side of things, one handy teaching I came across was if you look at emotion as 'energy in motion', the question becomes 'How am I feeling that energy?'. Is it functioning at hyperactive speeds or is there not enough of it? Does it feel stuck in one particular spot or a couple of spots? Do you feel it in the chest perhaps as heartache and/or the throat as some form of grief? Then there's a matter of figuring out the cause or what's led up to that feeling. On top of that there can be that compass factor or 'How do I take direction, based on this emotion/feeling?'. Perhaps the question becomes 'Do I need a guide to help me through what feels confusing or what feels like a dark part of my path in life? Do I need someone to bring to light what's really going on at this point, while offering me support?'. A guide could be a good friend, a trusted family member, counselor, psychologist, an enlightening YouTube person who makes a huge difference, author of a brilliant book etc. Could be anyone who's able to show you the way, in a way you can relate to.
I've found a significant key to unlocking so much comes with first knowing whether you're a feeler or not, whether you're someone who's able to feel deeply and easily. Another key comes down to how to do it strategically, consciously. All feelings are telling, from the thoroughly inspiring ones through to the deeply depressing ones.
I am sorry to hear that you are feeling sad and confused, but I am glad that you have reached out to this support forum for help. Your feelings are valid, and it is okay to feel sad even if you cannot pinpoint a specific reason. Sometimes, our emotions can be overwhelming, and it is important to take the time to process them.
It sounds like you have a lot on your plate, between your job, studies, and personal life. It is natural to feel overwhelmed and exhausted when we are juggling so many responsibilities. However, it is essential to prioritize your mental health and well-being. Have you considered taking a break from work or school to focus on your mental health? It may also be helpful to speak with a therapist or counselor who can provide you with tools to manage your emotions and help you navigate your confusion about your sexuality. Additionally, it is great that you have a supportive partner and employer who care about your well-being. Don't be afraid to reach out to them and let them know how you are feeling. It is okay to ask for help and support when we need it.
Remember, you are not alone, and there is no timeline for figuring out your sexuality or understanding your emotions. Take things one day at a time and focus on self-care. You deserve to feel happy and fulfilled, and I believe that you will find your way back up from this difficult time.