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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Anna84 Severe depression every month 1 wk before period
  • replies: 6

I'm not sure where I should post this. It's a women's issue I guess. I am on antidepressants and have been for quite a long time. I have social anxiety which causes my depression and anxiety but I do feel that I have my dossage right at the moment. T... View more

I'm not sure where I should post this. It's a women's issue I guess. I am on antidepressants and have been for quite a long time. I have social anxiety which causes my depression and anxiety but I do feel that I have my dossage right at the moment. The problem is that I go through this same cycle every month. I track my period on an app and every month 1 week before my period is due I fall into a deep depression where I feel hopeless and sad and that I want to run away from my life. I have spoken to a gp about it but they haven't got any solutions for me. I have two small children and I hate myself that I can't pull myself out of it. I just want to sleep and I can't cope with everyday things that comee with being a mother and wife like fighting between the children and having to organise everyone. I cried so much today that my eyes are so sore. I just feel so tired and wish I could leave and sleep for a week. I feel like my family would be better off without me sometimes. Does anyone else feel like this each month? I feel like there must be something I can do. It can't be normal to constantly go through this cycle and even though I try not to let it show it definitely affects my family. My husband says my emotionals are like a roller coaster. I can be really happy but then each month I am having these extreme lows.

katcha96 Hey
  • replies: 2

Hey, I'm sort of new to this. I've been suffering from depression since I was in school, and tried to ignore it. Unfortunately, both of my parents suffer different degrees of depression, as well as one of my brothers. Over the past 2 years, I've trie... View more

Hey, I'm sort of new to this. I've been suffering from depression since I was in school, and tried to ignore it. Unfortunately, both of my parents suffer different degrees of depression, as well as one of my brothers. Over the past 2 years, I've tried to get it under control, but as I started to seek help, I entered into my first relationship, and we use to get into fights, all the time. Him telling me to stop going from happy to upset all the time, and that I wasn't suffering depression; that it was all just stupid nonsense. He told me to go off my medication (which I only just started taking three months before we started dating). At the end of last year, after we broke up, I entered the worst state I have ever been in. It had gotten to the point of wanting to do some "stupid" things, and my family started to worry. A family friend, who has been through a lot in her younger years, finally dragged me back to the doctors to get back onto medication. It started to work, five months of feeling better than I have even been. But lately I started to sink again, entering those bad thoughts. I am kind of stuck at them moment, not knowing what to do. Some people tell me to get help, but I just feel like my problems are just a pebble in the ocean; that others have it worst. I can't talk to someone face to face, and I promised someone I would talk to someone... So here I am... trying something different, and hopefully finding a direction. Thanks, I guess.

nearlythere Please advise: I don’t want to be a loner anymore.
  • replies: 4

Ok long story short... I have always been a loner at heart. I desperately want this to change. Since primary school I have always felt distant from others. Now in my mid-thirties I have a large group of friends; a handful of close friends; socialisin... View more

Ok long story short... I have always been a loner at heart. I desperately want this to change. Since primary school I have always felt distant from others. Now in my mid-thirties I have a large group of friends; a handful of close friends; socialising is not a problem. I am not shy, happy to talk to anyone. I have an active and busy social life however my loner tendencies still haunt me. I moved to Australia a few years ago from Europe, started over. Most of my family has passed away. I am single. Childless. Desperately lonely. Prone to depression. I feel like on some level I must be pushing people away. Is my loner-ism psychological? Is it spiritual? It seems that on some level I cannot sustain relationships. I have seen counsellors and therapists. I’m honestly at the end of my tether. I’d appreciate any/all suggestions. Many thanks for your time.

Diaz99 I just want someone to help me.
  • replies: 4

I feel so bad and guilty when I see so many new threads starting on this discussion board. i started this intending to explain my situation but I’m so apathetic I can’t even. I’m hoping that posting this much will get me started. I just want someone ... View more

I feel so bad and guilty when I see so many new threads starting on this discussion board. i started this intending to explain my situation but I’m so apathetic I can’t even. I’m hoping that posting this much will get me started. I just want someone to genuinely help me.

love_of_baking Hard to control my emotions
  • replies: 1

I always just thought l was an emotional person which l didnt really see as much of a problem, l liked caring and having a heart. But now l feel its getting too much, if anything is a slight letdown or disappointment it affects me badly and l get so ... View more

I always just thought l was an emotional person which l didnt really see as much of a problem, l liked caring and having a heart. But now l feel its getting too much, if anything is a slight letdown or disappointment it affects me badly and l get so emotional and sometimes angry but I'm not angry I'm hurt, it just seems to come out as anger which is frustrating at times because l dont want to hurt the people around me. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and was seeing a psychologist for a few months bit l stopped going when l felt she knew too much and l started to feel judged. I was also on medication for about a year bit stopped that not long ago because l became pregnant. I don't know what I'm asking for and know no one can help me only l can do that. I guess I'm just looking for someone to listen and to get the strength to do something about the way I'm feeling again. I just want to be content with life. Thanks for reading

sallybrown Don't know who else to talk to
  • replies: 2

Hi all, I'm new here. Have had anxiety all my life, but depression is new to me. I'm struggling to gauge how serious it is and how to cope. Doing all the right things - I'm on a waiting list for a psychologist, have a doctor's appointment for next we... View more

Hi all, I'm new here. Have had anxiety all my life, but depression is new to me. I'm struggling to gauge how serious it is and how to cope. Doing all the right things - I'm on a waiting list for a psychologist, have a doctor's appointment for next week - but I just keep feeling worse and worse and I'm so lost right now with nobody I can talk to, because I'll either worry them or they won't understand. I think I just need to hear that it'll be okay? It started out this time as stress from a high pressure job. My mental health has deteriorated and now it all feels like a mess. I can't speak to my manager (who has previously been supportive) because my guilt and shame at not being able to cope is overwhelming. I've been in this job for a year and I feel like I deceived her at my interview by pretending I would be fine, only to fall apart. I can't quit because I can't imagine having to start a new job right now and I have a mortgage to pay. A day where I don't cry is a huge achievement right now. I've started having trouble sleeping which is rare for me, I'm more anxious, I'm back to hating myself. I feel hopeless and so mad at myself for not being able to cope with life like a "normal" person. Up until now I've still been able to do social things but that's getting too much for me now too. I've been limiting what I do for months because I'm very introverted and alone time has been important, but lately I've been lying to friends and saying I'm sick because it's just too hard to pretend I'm fine. I can't see any way of changing anything about my current situation, but I'm just so tired right now. Coping with life has never been more exhausting - and yet logically I know I'm lucky and it could be so much worse. I feel trapped and alone, and I guess I know it'll get better once I start getting help, but it doesn't feel that way. I just don't know what to do in the meantime.

Living57 4 walls, better to stay in than venture out
  • replies: 4

Today I really struggled. My depression seems to have reached maximum and then some. As I write this I'm lying in bed. It's dark and I can't even make out the walls or the door which suits me fine because the blackness just Echoes how I feel. Today I... View more

Today I really struggled. My depression seems to have reached maximum and then some. As I write this I'm lying in bed. It's dark and I can't even make out the walls or the door which suits me fine because the blackness just Echoes how I feel. Today I struggled all that I have in the past. I saw a documentary on television which was like watching my life in reality, its what I've been through as a child and it hurt. Was like somebody had read my inner core and put it out there for everyone to see. I just wanted to cry. Instead I went to my bed and laid there curled up sobbing silently knowing that there's nobody who really cares. I'm estranged from my son's. One daughter is in hospital very ill interstate and I cannot get to her finances don't allow it a failure on my part. My other daughter has two special needs children and is there fore me as the best she can be but I understand she needs to be there for her family first and foremost. My depression matches my room I'm lying in black and miserable. I tried some telephone counselling today as I cannot leave my house due to a fear of strangers after I had been assaulted about 18 months ago. I am struggling with basic supplies in the house and have no milk bread eggs butter fast running out of pantry Staples and too scared to go out and buy them and nobody in the area I live in to turn to to help me as I am just new here. I'm struggling to hold on and I know what it's like to go down that hell hole. I just don't want to be like this. I would like one day where I could have some semblance of normality. Some happiness. Something to look forward to. Not more of the same blackness embracing me. Surely there is more to life than this. I feel sometimes as if I'm just going through the motions and not actually living. I really don't know what to do. Being unable to leave the house means my social activities are limited. I try to read try to keep off the TV and internet and things that I know are unhelpful. I just don't know where to turn and I feel very alone. I see my doctor when I need to he's really good and I have a great relationship with him but he is now 45 minutes away and I am not changing doctors I cannot go through that hassle again and I have settled with him and he understands me. I do not know my neighbours having only been in this house 2 weeks. I am not aware of anybody who can help me and I just hate being this way. Surely there's more to life than this, at the end of the day this isn't living.

kohakuro Partner Getting Professional Help and I Think I Should Too
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, This may be quite a jumbled post. I have been a roller coaster of emotions for the last four days and I just need help. My boyfriend of over a year went to the GP on the weekend for help with his depression *trigger*... years ago he trie... View more

Hi everyone, This may be quite a jumbled post. I have been a roller coaster of emotions for the last four days and I just need help. My boyfriend of over a year went to the GP on the weekend for help with his depression *trigger*... years ago he tried taking his life and he used to self-harm. I knew he’d never received professional help but I thought he had been managing alright. He wouldn’t tell me why he was going for the appointment, and I only discovered the day after when I’d left his house that he’d been given a prescription for antidepressants and has been booked in for psychological help. That night, once I left his (we still live with our parents), I broke down in tears. I haven’t had a break down like that in months. Please don’t get me wrong, I am so, so glad that he’s realised he needs help and is taking action. But it broke me. I guess I value communication - he’s always so on to me to communicate, yet couldn’t or wouldn’t tell me how bad he is mentally again. He freely discusses it in Facebook groups with our friends (how I’ve found out all this) but struggles with me. I can understand he may be embarrassed, I feel he doesn’t want me to worry, but the silly boy doesn’t know it makes me physically sick when I am this worried about him. He always wants to be the strong one for me, and never lets me help him. Onto me now.. two years ago my mum forced me into the GP to discuss my mental ‘issues’ that were causing me to ‘be lazy with schoolwork and have no motivation’. The doctor said after assessment I had moderate depression and referred me to a psychologist. Unfortunately she made things worse between me and my mum (who believed it was my fault I wasn’t listening to the psych and wasn’t better after a month) so I never went back. I just feel like I need some advice. Im much worse than I used to be. I ditch all of my worries about family, study, work and the future on him. I feel guilty and selfish for that. And I feel like I blame myself for him seeking professional help. He insists I don’t affect him in that way but I’d have to. And with him starting antidepressants, I am irrationally scared it’ll change him or make his depression worse. I don’t know why, but I can’t convince myself it’s okay. He wants me to get help as ‘I’m much worse than him’ (I have a lot of issues atm) but I’m scared. I’m 18 now, my parents can’t know. I don’t know if trying professional help again will be a better experience. But I need to help myself, to help him xx

Kel93 Don’t know what to do 😔
  • replies: 3

Hi everyone, I’m a 25 year old with 2 children an d currently suffereing postnatal depression (being treated for) my parter is 26 and about 2 weeks ago told me he no longer thinks he loves me or wants to be with me anymore and was going to leave(he e... View more

Hi everyone, I’m a 25 year old with 2 children an d currently suffereing postnatal depression (being treated for) my parter is 26 and about 2 weeks ago told me he no longer thinks he loves me or wants to be with me anymore and was going to leave(he ended up staying) he went to see a doctor who said he had depression and put him on medication since taking them he has been emotionless, unhappy, grumpy and not wanting to do anything. He was also having dreams of violence and harming/killing me which then turned into dreams of him cheating on me with multiple women, he is saying he wants to get the ‘spark’ and in love feeling back in our relationship but we are unsure how to do this but he also changes his mind everyday on things he wants and is saying he doesn’t even know what he wants with anything. Has anyone else experienced that same thing? What was your outcome?

Lake_meadows Ouch
  • replies: 6

So woke up this morning greated with Ive had enough I want out we need to talk. Not really the way to get a good response from somebody with BPD. a 53 yr old male who 18mnths ago was lying in a bed in ICU because he tried to take his own life. Now Ih... View more

So woke up this morning greated with Ive had enough I want out we need to talk. Not really the way to get a good response from somebody with BPD. a 53 yr old male who 18mnths ago was lying in a bed in ICU because he tried to take his own life. Now Ihave done said hurt lied cheated and a whole lot more none of which Im proud of. Two things it would appear im crap at life and reltionships .I do take my meds and see my therapist and I try so hard but because you dont agree or do something another way your told its your illness over and over.really not the best thing to tell BPD sufferer . Do I feel loved no abandoned yes all of what I have done I own my mistakes yes sorry yes . I dont relly know if i feel safe depressed alone and scared I cant be intermit feel that ships sailed struggle with food and binge eating so not exactly slim taught and terriffic with low self esteem and the libido of a house brick dont think medication helps with it either just want it to stop. At 50 ish its too hard no easier to deal with now than it was then.BPD sucks and most probaly one of the hardest to treat. Hard to hold it all in just keep living the lie.

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