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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Ryleigh_19 Why does everyone annoy me
  • replies: 7

Feel like I can never be honest with anyone, I don’t know how to talk with normal people and wish I could, so carefree but yet they feel so ignorant. Depressions been getting bad, first month without seeing my mates and it’s not bad exactly but I kno... View more

Feel like I can never be honest with anyone, I don’t know how to talk with normal people and wish I could, so carefree but yet they feel so ignorant. Depressions been getting bad, first month without seeing my mates and it’s not bad exactly but I know I’m not gonna get better I don’t wanna be lonely but all my mates do is drugs and they feel so stupid.

Niks85 Thinking I want out
  • replies: 8

Hi to anyone willing to listen I haven't posted in a long time. I'm feeling very down lately and feeling a bit unhappily married because my husband although a great financial supporter is terrible at emotional support. Sometimes I find him controllin... View more

Hi to anyone willing to listen I haven't posted in a long time. I'm feeling very down lately and feeling a bit unhappily married because my husband although a great financial supporter is terrible at emotional support. Sometimes I find him controlling and occasionally he puts me down. Things were great once then covid hit and his company folded. Whats really got me down is he doesnt really want more kids we have a daughter who is 1 and I feel like im now grieving the baby I never had or will have. Today i actually thought about divorce which scares me. I love being a mum feeling so devastated. While its a thing of the past now I miss my best friend. My husband hated her and we are no longer friends because of it. Just so unhappy but we have a daughter now so I feel stuck. What do I do? Counseling wont work hes a closed book. I haven't worked for two years so im really stuck. So depressed

Dazzi Sounds
  • replies: 6

Hi Guys Im new to this site, but have suffered depression most of my adult life (im 49). I recently lost my nan who has played a huge part in my life, along with work stress and with the way the world is with covid the past 12 months has wrecked havo... View more

Hi Guys Im new to this site, but have suffered depression most of my adult life (im 49). I recently lost my nan who has played a huge part in my life, along with work stress and with the way the world is with covid the past 12 months has wrecked havoc with my depression. I imagine many people are in a similar boat to me. I stumbled across some sounds that i found soothing, ive always loved listening to rain of a night laying in bed and found it took some of the pain away and made me feel somewhat relaxed, so ive found some sounds and would listen to them at night. Stay safe, Stay OK most of all talk to those around you.

Macca247 Bipolar and Cheating (Advice)
  • replies: 6

Hey Guys, I am after some advice off people who have experienced bipolar and cheating issues. There is a long story around my Bipolar diagnosis but cheating multiple times over an 11 year relationship was the catalyst that got me in front of a therap... View more

Hey Guys, I am after some advice off people who have experienced bipolar and cheating issues. There is a long story around my Bipolar diagnosis but cheating multiple times over an 11 year relationship was the catalyst that got me in front of a therapist and therefore Im 33 and been diagnosed with Bipolar Dec Last year. I have been working on everything to help since last year, weekly therapy sessions and medication I still have episodes where frantically talk to other people and sometimes cheat. I will go periods where I don't even think about it (6 months) but then all of a sudden i find myself falling down the rabbit hole and it feels to good to crawl back out of. My (sort of ex) partner of 11 years and I live seperate we still share hope that we can have a relationship and this is why I need your help. I cant see or feel that I will be able to stop these actions and if this is the case I would prefer to end the relationship as I have already put her through to much pain and don't want to put her through anymore. My questions are: Will this always be a problem due to my diagnosis or does it go away ever? I am taking medication, therapy and it still happens I don't know what else to do? Any help / advice would be great Adam

mish_kebab Difficulty at work because depression, or depressed because difficulty at work?
  • replies: 2

Hi all, This is very hard to type. I don't know what I'm doing, but I also don't know what else to do. I have a meeting with my boss tomorrow morning to discuss, and waiting for a call-back from a psychologists office, as well as an appointment to se... View more

Hi all, This is very hard to type. I don't know what I'm doing, but I also don't know what else to do. I have a meeting with my boss tomorrow morning to discuss, and waiting for a call-back from a psychologists office, as well as an appointment to set up a mental health care plan on Wednesday. At the moment, I'm suffering because my responsibilities at work kicked up a notch around August last year and they've progressively gotten more intense. I also started some counselling around that time, which also got a bit intense pretty quickly. I've had a history of depression in the past, all managed while maintaining my career, but I am beginning to feel like this time might be the time where I need to jettison my career and go back to something more simple. I don't know what the chicken or the egg is here, whether it's the increased responsibility at work or maybe this is just a relapse because of the things I've been talking about in counselling? A lot of family of origin stuff has come up. Corporal punishment = fear of making mistakes, bullying = body shame issues, parental incarceration in teenage years = parentification/emotional incest by other parent, moved around schools often = always an outsider in school, social skills issues. I do not think highly of myself, let's say that. The new GP who I went and saw about my mental state today has asked me to take a couple of days off of work, and find a psychologist to see instead of a counsellor as they might be able to be more structured in their approach, but it leaves me without knowing how I get through the next few days/weeks, etc. at work. I called my dad, in tears, and asked him if I could move in with him for a bit; just in case the talk with my boss tomorrow doesn't go in a way where I feel supported enough to continue working here. He said of course, and that I didn't even need to ask. But, losing my job, moving and figuring out how my relationship works while I live 2 hours away from where I do now is something that needs to be taken into account. On top of this, my partner who I would normally talk to about all this is currently in the middle of an assignment for a job application and they're doing so well on it today that I don't want to lump this on them. Today is not a very good day. Does anyone have some perspective for me? Gosh I'd really like some.

S89 Needing help
  • replies: 3

Hey everyone, I'm new here but I just don't know where else to turn too. I have had depression and anxiety for ~3 years the therapist I have been seeing has said it is mostly due to work burn out as I used to do some serious hours. After successfully... View more

Hey everyone, I'm new here but I just don't know where else to turn too. I have had depression and anxiety for ~3 years the therapist I have been seeing has said it is mostly due to work burn out as I used to do some serious hours. After successfully getting my self back on track, all this covid stuff really impacted me. So much so I stepped down from work (I'm in Vic and considered essential) I applied for job seeker as of November, how ever my last boss had always said there is a position for me once I was up to it, they called me weekly to check up on me and offer assistance which seemed annoying at the time but really helped. Anyway due to this work related stuff we had planned for me to come back slowly as part time to ease in to it, how ever to stay on job seeker I need to apply for jobs each week. I have explained my situation to many people at centrelink and the only response has been apply for jobs and don't accept them. I don't want to do this, I have been a manager and I hated this happening too me, but constantly arguing this point has set back my mental health in a big way and I feel like I will have to go back to full time work before I am ready. One last detail I spoke to my GP about a centrelink certificate and she will only do it for a week at a time, I live an hour away from my GP as I'm one of those guys who finds it hard to open up to new drs etc. Has anyone been able to deal with centrelink in this way before?

Maggie_ Lonely and homesick
  • replies: 2

I emigrated to Australia 7 years ago and had my first child here October 2019. My parents were going to visit after the birth but I told them not to worry as I planned on going back to the UK for a visit in May 2020 so that everyone can meet our baby... View more

I emigrated to Australia 7 years ago and had my first child here October 2019. My parents were going to visit after the birth but I told them not to worry as I planned on going back to the UK for a visit in May 2020 so that everyone can meet our baby. Both mine and my husband's families are in the UK - we have zero family in Australia. Anyway covid hit and now fast forward 14 months and our families still haven't met our daughter. I'm heartbroken by this and feel so completely homesick and lonely here. What hasn't helped is that my friends in Australia seemed to hardly contact or visit me once i had a baby and I tried making new mum friends but most of the time they're busy as it seems everyone else has extended family here (or very close friends) but us! I feel like everyone else has a big support network and I have no one. I don't think I'd want to move back to the UK as I think my daughter will have a better life here but I just worry I'll always feel lonely and homesick. I desperately miss my parents and sisters. I think about how much more enjoyable my maternity leave would have been if I was around them rather than here alone with no family or friends. Does anyone else here suffer from severe homesickness? What do you find helps? Thank you

Bubble44 I don't know why I keep fighting.
  • replies: 7

To be clear, this isn't a post about being suicidal. I'm not and I'm confident that I never will be. Despite that though, I feel like I'm done with life. I fought so hard to dig my way out of a pit of unrelenting depression and loneliness. The very s... View more

To be clear, this isn't a post about being suicidal. I'm not and I'm confident that I never will be. Despite that though, I feel like I'm done with life. I fought so hard to dig my way out of a pit of unrelenting depression and loneliness. The very short version is due to extreme abuse at the hands of family members for two whole decades, I took much longer than most people my age to develop social skills. I'm 21 now. During high school, there was about a 4 year period where I had maybe two conversations a day that weren't with a family member (which you can't escape if you live with them). I had no friends. They all left me. I spent my final years of high school desperately fighting to attain a core group of friends who actually cared about me. And I did it. I thought I won. Despite countless nights of crying myself to sleep because all I had felt for years was rage and pain I finally had a group of people around me who genuinely cared and supported me. I did it, despite all the odds. So here I am. Everything should be okay now right? Well, most of my friends have abandoned me because I refused to put up with issues from someone in the group. He tried to rape a friend of mine (she was their friend too). They admitted that yes, he did try to rape her. So who did they choose? Me, who never did anything to any of them? Of course not. They cut me out of their lives and continued to associate with this rapist. Now, I could understand if they cut us both off. Sometimes people just don't get along. Not everyone has to like me. I get that. But keeping him and throwing me away? There is only one way to interpret that. People that I loved more than I have ever loved my own family, people that meant EVERYTHING to me. To these people, I am worth less than a rapist. The few friends I retained (who were also cut off) are also drifting away now. We have no common interests (they only ever talk about cars. Seriously, for hours on end) and they often organise events without inviting me. I also have no dating life. As soon as a girl notices I'm inexperienced or notice a hint of my depression, they vanish. I have spent half of my life one notch away from wanting to end my life. I prevailed (and will continue to), but what do I have to show for it? I am worth less than a rapist. When my closest friends thought that, how could anyone ever care? What's the point of having friends? What's the point in dating? Why should I even bother? It always ends the same way.

Selim Could I be transgender and depressed because I am wise beyond my years
  • replies: 1

Hi, I’m 27 and have been dealing with cross dressing and desires to live as a woman since I was in year 10 (since I was 16). never been in a heterosexual relationship with a woman but I want to live my life as a woman and be with a man or a woman. I ... View more

Hi, I’m 27 and have been dealing with cross dressing and desires to live as a woman since I was in year 10 (since I was 16). never been in a heterosexual relationship with a woman but I want to live my life as a woman and be with a man or a woman. I have been depressed since 2014 and had various diagnosis. i recall once wearing a pair of pink/purple male shorts when I came into work and the trainee store manager commented something like I was beyond my manhood. in recent years I have been dressing as feminine as possible on some occasions and I really love it and am pretty sure I’d be happier having female body characteristics. at the same time some people told me I ‘you are wise beyond your years’ as they commented on my mature attitude towards politics haha. What do you think?

Brett4991 I feel trapped
  • replies: 3

I dont know how to explain myself but I feel like nothing makes me feel joy any more. I have always dedicated myself to others through my work or my actions. But when I get home to my girlfriend I feel nothing but regret and shame. I have never been ... View more

I dont know how to explain myself but I feel like nothing makes me feel joy any more. I have always dedicated myself to others through my work or my actions. But when I get home to my girlfriend I feel nothing but regret and shame. I have never been the best boyfriend although I have tried so hard but nothing I do seems to make her happy. I have given up friends, moved houses, moved states, left jobs and even restrict my job optunities in my new job so I can be there but its never enough. I always make her upset or mad which gets my upset or mad, I find myself in this never ending cycle where I'm the bad guy or she is. We have broken up multiple times and we he have both always begged one another to get back together now I feel like I have ruined her life that I should of left long ago before we gave so much to each other before I resented her before I made choices that truly broke my heart in the hopes I would make her happy. Now I go home and feel empty I don't have anything to give, I feel nothing for my family or friends I feel like a failure cause I can't remember that last time I truly felt happy. I feel if I leave her all my sacrifices that I have made would be for nothing but if I stay I will ruin her life and my own. She isn't a bad person I know she means no harm and she can't help it but I want out I want to feel alive again I want to be able to have dreams without worrying I will hurt her but I'm terrified I will crush her im terrifiedif I lose the last thing in my world that's a constant ill have no reason to get up in the morning.i feel that no matter what I chose my life will be over.