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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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sometimeshappysometimessa depression or something more?
  • replies: 2

I need help. I probably won't be able to explain this but here we go. I was originally diagnosed with depression but something isn't right. I had a brain injury 19 years ago and I'm still having problems. I've gotten so much better but I still have m... View more

I need help. I probably won't be able to explain this but here we go. I was originally diagnosed with depression but something isn't right. I had a brain injury 19 years ago and I'm still having problems. I've gotten so much better but I still have memory issues, I can't focus for long periods of time, generally can't focus on what people are saying, can't control my emotions for periods, whether it's sad, happy, or angry.. overthinking absolutely everything, I think I always think something will go wrong at any time so I'm always in a kind of fight or flight? overstimulated & overwhelmed easily & sometimes I cannot for the life of me make decisions. when I have to learn something new I memorise as opposed to actually learning whatever it is. when people talk it goes in one ear and out the other and then I beat myself up for not really listening. generally I don't drink a lot of alcohol but when I do, I go a bit overboard. I have forgotten appointments in the past because I was distracted. i have a social phobia outside my immediate family and a few close friends. other than them, I don't really talk to people. Not because I don't want to, I'm just so bloody afraid. i get so super stressed or angry about minuscule things, I've noticed I spend a lot of money over a short period of time. Sometimes if I see a thing I want to buy, I won't be able to relax until I have it. I don't feel safe driving all the time because the attention just isn't there I think I know what "it" is & I need different treatment I had a letter to a psychiatrist faxed away and now we wait.

Argirios Hello, depressed and Lonely.
  • replies: 4

Not sure where to start, I suffer depression (taking some medication for it) and have for a long time, though didn't really see professional help until a little over a year ago. I have no close friends. I probably wouldn't even say I have distant fri... View more

Not sure where to start, I suffer depression (taking some medication for it) and have for a long time, though didn't really see professional help until a little over a year ago. I have no close friends. I probably wouldn't even say I have distant friends. Acquaintances at best. Never been in a relationship. Not even close. This can really hold me back as I can't even relate to people on either of these topics. Worse when I try to express my feelings and then it often gets taken over quickly bwith someone else's relationship issue and then the group would discuss that because it is more relatable/interesting. I've joined various clubs/groups that had similar interests though they all knew each other on more personal levels and from other locations that I never truly felt like I was part of them. Even after years. I would look forward to it all week, but then as soon as it was over for the session, it was over. As if I didn't matter. They've all also either disbanded or moved on. I probably have anxiety issues though that comes and goes. The worst was a couple years ago at a lonely station I experienced a strong feeling of an absence of imaginary people. I used to enjoy hobbies many years ago but seems worth less these days. It can be hard for me to truly say what hobbies I have. I saw one Psychologist for 5 sessions that didn't help. Then I saw another for two and felt it would go the same way. Not sure if there is an easier way to search for psychologists as I need to do this again before seeing my GP again for another referral. Last few days felt like maybe I was feeling more sadness then depression. Like I had accepted the state I was in, in a good way. But I feel the depression creep back when I felt like caring again. Trying to reach out to possible friends. Sorry for the long post.

GMarenghi Regrets
  • replies: 2

Lately I've been looking back on my past a lot and revisiting memories and regrets. Partly because it's the new year, also because recently I've tried to live more intentionally. I'm early-thirties and hopeful that perhaps some older members can plea... View more

Lately I've been looking back on my past a lot and revisiting memories and regrets. Partly because it's the new year, also because recently I've tried to live more intentionally. I'm early-thirties and hopeful that perhaps some older members can please give some perspective. I can tell myself that past mistakes are learning lessons, but what happens when I make mistakes of a different kind? Sometimes I wish I could go back, having all the knowledge I have now, and re-do everything. I might be in a better place now. Also, less related to regrets but does anyone else feel troubled whenever they hear people swearing in public? I don't mean swearing angrily or because they tripped or something, but just swearing as part of their everyday language? I am aware that I am probably a sensitive person, but to me swearing just comes across as openly hostile, especially when it is unnecessary. Thanks for reading.

Clobug11 I should be happy *trigger warning - weight*
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone, this is my first post. I seem to have gotten into a dark hole with life that I can’t find the motivation to get out of. From the outside people say I should be happy - I have a loving partner, a beautiful daughter, a stable job etc but l... View more

Hi everyone, this is my first post. I seem to have gotten into a dark hole with life that I can’t find the motivation to get out of. From the outside people say I should be happy - I have a loving partner, a beautiful daughter, a stable job etc but lately I just feel like besides my daughter I have nothing to live for. I’ve stopped doing any social activities because I can’t muster up the energy, I’ve gained 23kgs and hate my body yet can’t stop eating and can’t motivate myself to exercise. I’ve lost all passion for things I used to enjoy and spend my time alone sleeping. Sometimes I think a career change would help as I have no love for my job but I don’t have any energy to try something new. Does anyone feel the same and how do I get out of this rut? Thanks for listening.

SweetChariot Always waiting for a better tomorrow
  • replies: 3

I feel like I am always waiting and hoping for a better outcome to occur for me but it seems like I am just waiting for nothing and that nothing good will ever come my way. I feel sad at the life I have and don't want to be this person and still have... View more

I feel like I am always waiting and hoping for a better outcome to occur for me but it seems like I am just waiting for nothing and that nothing good will ever come my way. I feel sad at the life I have and don't want to be this person and still have to face people. I feel ashamed at who I am wish I didn't have to see anyone again. I wonder if I am just being greedy and stupid for wanting more things and that I should just accept what I have, but I cant seem to push away and become happy. I am currently 26 and I feel sad that I am not dating anyone and am unsure about my career and if I enjoy what I studied and work in. I want to be doing something that I feel is worthwhile and interesting but I wonder whether it is just me that can't seem to find enjoyment or fulfillment. I was hoping to try and buy an apartment by 28 but feel as though it will not happen as it will be too costly to do on my own in Sydney. I feel ashamed and foolish for thinking that I would be able to do so before. I feel as though everything I I hope for will never come true and I am just living a life I never wanted and don't wish to have. It gives me stomach cramps and a lot of stress. I kept telling myself to keep trying and hoping and to try and make changes but it seems anything I do is for the worst. I wish I was someone I could be proud of. I feel as though I am not sure what good things I am hoping for in the future and question what benefit I can still bring to anyone. I currently feel each day I am just waiting for the evening to sleep and the day to be done again.

Pingunoog Lost High Schooler With Depression
  • replies: 3

Hello, I want some feedback on whether I'm going crazy or whether other people have felt the same... I'm a 17 yr old high schooler and I've been battling depression since I was in Yr 8. Lately, I've been told that that I failed a Preliminary subject ... View more

Hello, I want some feedback on whether I'm going crazy or whether other people have felt the same... I'm a 17 yr old high schooler and I've been battling depression since I was in Yr 8. Lately, I've been told that that I failed a Preliminary subject and may not be able to complete the HSC this year. I was looking forwards to graduating high school and leaving the experiences of high school behind but this news of having to redo an extra year has completely crushed me. I can't think about surviving another year in high school, I can't rely on my friends or my teachers because I understand that they are unable to empathise with my pain. The decision of not completing the HSC has weighed heavily on my mind because I'm sick and tired of the mundane routine that high school forces on me. I used to be so caught up in grades that I've completely burnt out and don't want to care anymore, I want to be free and do more than what school offers. So I've researched extensively into alternate pathways and TAFE courses but some teachers are extra pushy about ATAR and all that. How do I tell people that I don't care about my ATAR? If my ATAR means I'm going to be broken throughout my uni years, I'd rather not receive an ATAR at all. I'd rather continue my education by working, building connections and getting a diploma before entering uni to obtain a degree. People keep telling me things I don't want to hear, "Focus on the HSC.", "You're going to get a good ATAR because you're smart.", "What do you mean you're not good? You're good at everything." Why can't these people see that I have periods where I genuinely considered not living at all? Some adults might think, oh, this 17 year old is naive and doesn't know what's best for themselves, "completing the HSC is the most important". Sometimes I just want to tell these adults, the child knows themselves better than anyone else so sometimes I wish they'd support me for more than the grades I produce as their student. It doesn't help that I attend a private school and parents are financially unstable and can't afford an extra year of school on top of math tuitions. At this point, I don't even know if I should just drop out and go work experience then transfer through TAFE.

Stagnated Stagnated
  • replies: 4

Hello to all i write this on the brink of tears and my sorrow welling up in throat. If there were a mirror, I’d look away in disgust. If I were to describe myself, it would be ‘loser’! My inner happiness has been sucked out of me years ago. I walk ar... View more

Hello to all i write this on the brink of tears and my sorrow welling up in throat. If there were a mirror, I’d look away in disgust. If I were to describe myself, it would be ‘loser’! My inner happiness has been sucked out of me years ago. I walk around as an empty shell with a false smile on my face. That mask I wear to cover up my self hatred and loathing. I am a good, kind person who rescues others, whilst I drown in self abuse. Daily mantra is “I am not worthy”. My friends never text or call unless I do so first. They’re happy enough to want to talk and catch up, but I am not worthy of being one of their priorities. My siblings were brought up as dysfunctional as I. I continually question the experience of ‘joy’ and most nights anxiety creeps up on me. Why, why am I such a person no one wants? I am respectful and genuine when meeting and greeting others, yet I have my brink wall up. Afraid of being hurt or rejected. That’s my middle name “rejected”. “Loser” being my first. I have raised my children and enjoy my Grandchildren. I go to local clubs, bowlos to meet new people. I engage, laugh, smile, talk freely. Yet here I am, no phone calls or texts. i must be socially inept or simply not cut out to be let lose in society. How do you make new friend, meet new people, live a normal adjusted life? What is that!

Gem17 BPD diagnosis
  • replies: 36

I have very recently been diagnosed with BPD. While it was very overwhelming to hear at first, after speaking about it with professionals as well as doing my own research I feel as though the past 20+ years of my life make so much sense now. Has anyo... View more

I have very recently been diagnosed with BPD. While it was very overwhelming to hear at first, after speaking about it with professionals as well as doing my own research I feel as though the past 20+ years of my life make so much sense now. Has anyone else experienced this? I would love to connect with people who may have had similar experiences.

Bee1998 I hate the way I feel, and half the time I don't know why I'm feeling this way
  • replies: 2

I constantly feel frustrated inside, like I'm missing something and i don't know what it is. I have overwhelming feelings rush through me most days, which include agitation, anger, frustration, sadness, emptiness, loneliness, confusion, worry..... It... View more

I constantly feel frustrated inside, like I'm missing something and i don't know what it is. I have overwhelming feelings rush through me most days, which include agitation, anger, frustration, sadness, emptiness, loneliness, confusion, worry..... It's hard to explain, but even now as I'm typing this, I feel like weird rush of frustration through my body. It's almost as if I need to punch a wall, have sex, do drugs, or all of the above at the same time. It sounds silly, but that's the best way of describing it. It's like i'm never satisfied with life, and nothing interests me or excites me anymore. I'm constantly bored and wanting to go and do things, but am unable to due to my lack of friends. Today I got so bored that I resorted to drinking alcohol. Even just thinking of things I could do frustrated me, or just didn't interest me. I would have liked to have gone to the beach with a friend or something, but I don't have anyone to ask. Even if I did that though, it would just be to pass time... I still would feel empty. I just want to scream and cry and kick and punch. I don't know what is wrong with me.

RupertTurtleMan Life of the Party but Alone
  • replies: 3

I got diagnosed with ADHD earlier in the year and started working on myself and lost heaps of weight, started working out etc and got really into shape, and became sober. I feel healthy, have a great job, and people like having me around because I am... View more

I got diagnosed with ADHD earlier in the year and started working on myself and lost heaps of weight, started working out etc and got really into shape, and became sober. I feel healthy, have a great job, and people like having me around because I am the life if the party, and I go with the flow but I still feel alone. I am far more productive, the other issues my ADHD was causing pretty much went away, but still I feel alone and empty. The only thing that makes me genuinely feel happy is playing with my son, and really is the only reason I get out of bed in the morning and follow my routine. I've felt like this on and off for years, and it genuinely did get better when I became sober and started working in myself but still this persists, and I don't really have anyone to talk to since I just have to "man up".