*You Gotta Friend in Us*
I wanted to start this thread so that there was a place that people could introduce themselves and have a chat and make some friends when it seems that is a really hard thing to do in the "real world", that out there in life it is so very hard for people to make friends and maintain friendships and feel like they matter and are of value in a friendship.
So welcome and I can't wait for you all to chat and share with each other and know that you have friends here.
So to start the conversation if you feel it weird to write a post on here....grab a coffee or whatever your chat drink of choice is..maybe an Oat Milk Chai...yum ...and let's get started making new friends....
"What is something that no one would know by looking at you?"
Mine is that I speak Thai.....
Hugs and love as always
Hi there Sarah,
What would be something that people would not know by looking at me? Hmm, good question. I don't speak a second language or play an instrument or anything like that. When I read this question a recent situation came to mind. I helped a neighbour who was in distress with eye pain. I took her to ER and grabbed her some dinner and gave her a bit of company. It was the second time I had ever met her. In the following days I could tell she was struggling with extreme anxiety and some loneliness amongst other issues. To help her in her struggles I opened up ( a little) about my own mental health issues. She was shocked and stunned. She kept saying she would have never ever believed it. She said I would be the last person she would have thought would have such issues. Apparently I come across as 'calm' and 'together' and 'able', were some of the words she used. Weeks later she was still greeting me with "I cant believe you have these issues!". It made me realise you just never know what people go through or who they are from face value. I guess I was sort of happy that my 'mask' was working so well. I have even had GPs say "Well you would never know by looking at you..." when I have an appointment regarding my anxiety issues. The saying 'Don't judge a book by its cover' comes to mind in this discussion.
Wow what a human! that is a wonderful story and shows real compassion and caring to do that for your neighbor, what a great person you are. I am sure that she will remember the kindness you displayed to her for ever, it is not everyday you meet someone so willing to do that for another. Awesome!
That is really brave of you to "expose" your MH and share your story, it is so empowering too and I am glad that you can see that removing your "cover" to show the "book" that is you is such a wonderful thing. Anxiety is not who you are and what you have done for your neighbour shows this.
Great to chat to you calmseeker and I hope some more friends come to chat and to introduce themselves here.
Wishing you a great day
Aaaw Gawd Sarah you are so kind to say those things about me, I am going red, not used to compliments and not very good at taking them! I would hope that any decent person would do the same for another human being. I probably just should have written 'something someone would never tell from looking at me is that I have debilitating depression and anxiety" - as mentioned in my little story, my neighbour was shocked to find out.
Wanted to ask you, how did it come about that you can speak Thai ?
That was a lovely story calmseeker and you should be proud of your self.
I have similar story when last time i was in the mental hospital i was in my 40s and most of the people were in their 20s and a few my age but their was this one elderly guy there and no one spoke to him and he use to stay in hos room and do word search puzzles so i use to go in there and talk to him and help him with his puzzles everyday and always checked on him.He was really a nice old man and when i told him i had been discharged he said i dont want you to go i will miss you and gave me a big hug.It shows kindness goes a long way.
Sorry to make you feel awkward with the compliments, I think you might find though that we are sort of short on humans like you, that not everyone would be so kind and caring. Today I think we are pretty consumed with our own lives and our own selves that we dont really even know who our neighbours are.
So my ex and I lived in Thailand for his work, we went there for one year as expats and ended up staying for 6! I had my daughter there and my son went to school there too. So to get through the day effectively we really needed to learn Thai, so we did. It doesn't really help me in my life today but it is very handy when we go to Thailand for holidays!!
I am so sorry you live with debilitating anxiety and depression. I hope here you can meet some amazing people to provide some friendships and some conversation when it probably is really hard to find that "in real life".
just looking to make some friends here 😌
i think on the outside i seem a little mean or up myself... I mean maybe I am up myself but I hope I’m not and I’m definitely not mean haha
i do care a lot about other people... i recently got surgery and i was at the rehab clinic and there was a guy who lost his ring finger and another guy who was in a motercycle accident... a day or so later i was with my mum and I just started crying over how awful their experiences were and how bad I felt for them... the guy who lost his finger must have cried so much... and the motercycle guy got a much worse injury than he would have because he crashed himself so he wouldn’t hit a student that he was teaching. I thought that was really nice and I cried about it for a while.
i am very wrapped up in myself because I have something along the lines of obsessive rumination OCD which means that I obsessively think about where I am in life and how the world affects me but I promise I do really really care about other people. at the moment it’s not showing because I’m emotionally burnt out which makes me feel really bad but it’s okay because I know I still care since I cried about strangers (just not people I care about because I’m numb due to how much more it would hurt given how much I care about them).
anyway that’s something that other people wouldn’t guess is that I do really care about people it’s just stuffed down deep so I don’t get too hurt.
love you all and I hope I can get to know some of you better