Scared of "trivial, everyday" things

[Moonstruck]

Does anyone else share this irrational, stupid, inconvenient anxiety? It doesn't happen all the time but when it does I cannot explain it or know what to do, to get rid of it. It will sound comical, laughable when I tell you but that's OK...it sounds funny to me also. I will start by saying there are certain situations I am active in, at which I exel, where the majority of folk would be terrified. I am brilliant there...and yet scared of this "little stuff" .

For months I was frightened of going to a different petrol station nearby. Prices went sky high at most places in my town, and this one was cheaper, popular, accessible and an obvious choice and for months I put off going there...because I was scared of it. Which bowser should I pull up at? Which buttons do I push to key in the dollars I want?. What if there is a big queue?...so I eventually had to ask a neighbour (who is familiar with anxiety problems) to go with me, just to sit beside me and quietly tell me what to do. Otherwise I would never have "mastered the petrol station"!

Yesterday i bought a new vacuum cleaner. It was a good price, I am pleased with it, I want to use it asap and need to use it. I look forward to using it. I am scared to get it out of the box. What if I can't understand the instructions in the manual? It's different from my last one. see how stupid it sounds? I am scared of my vacuum cleaner!!!!

and yet if you could see what I achieved just recently in a specialised field...you would be amazed at my competency and confidence!!!

WHY am I scared of these trivial everyday things? God knows how long it will take for me to begin assembling that vacuum cleaner which I know, logically, I am intelligent enough to figure out!! So why am I procrastinating about it?

What is wrong with me? Who could help me? Any suggestions or thoughts would be very welcome......have a nice day..... Moonstruck.

[Hanna3]

Hi Moon, how did you go? I think you're doing what I do which is I tend to "spin out" with anxiety when faced with something complicated like travel arrangements/what to take etc etc. So one thing at a time, then reward yourself with a rest break/something nice, pat yourself on the back, well done.

You can start with the easiest thing, maybe what shoes you will take/wear, what shirts or toiletries. One category at a time, just pick out say shoes. Then pat yourself on the back, that's one thing done, well done, reward yourself with a rest break. Then what shirts/pants/whatever, well done, rest break. Do something different, then go back later and do another thing, then pat on the back, well done, rest/stress break. Remember to reward yourself with something each time you achieve another step. Well done!

Be kind to yourself. It's anxiety and I know the feeling well believe me! One little step at a time and you'll be amazed how you manage to get it done. Come back and post some more if any of us can help you more. Cheers my friend you can do more than you think you can - you need someone to give you a confidence boost!

[Bulus_Shabbaz]

I've been going through a roller coaster of emotions and paranoia over small trivial things since I have moved into my new place. However, maybe my paranoia might not be unfounded as only this afternoon I dismissed sounds of what I initially thought was "them" coming to get me as just my psychosis playing up. However, later tonight speaking to another tenant, they said that some drug-fueled person broke into the room above me from my room this afternoon, and was surprised I hadn't heard the commotion. I think I am deflecting my focus on trivial things to distract myself from some rather major happenings in my living situation.

[CMF]

Hi Moon,

Not sure if this helps but sometimes you can order the voucher on line and have it delivered.

Just a thought.

Luv ya

Cmf x

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

you have received some good suggestions.

I'd be grateful if you could reflect about true strenght. When all is well and there are no problems anyone can get by. You are faced with a series of challenges that push all your buttons, raising fears to the surface - but you have not given up, no matter how tempting the idea, but are wrestling with ways and means. Hardly the actions of someone hopeless, pathetic or embarrassed - quite the opposite.

To me that is a cause for admiration.

I can't give suggestions for all the matters you raise, but here are a couple of thoughts:-

Plane bookings? -Well if you do not feel up to making them on the internet go to a travel agent and get them to do the bookings.

Wardrobe? - Basic limited number of colors, then mix and match.

To tired to do everything planned? -Then say so! Employ Maggie Smith in one of her old lady roles - world weary, wise and expecting a nap with confidence as a matter of right.

Your observations on avoidance are no doubt true, the less you bring yourself to face the greater the number of situations that will feel that way. So use ingenuity to get round the problems, then you will not only feel you have conquered but are intelligent and resourceful too.

You are going to have an enjoyable time away, it will be fine

Croix

[blondguy]

Hey Hey Moon!

It might not be very helpful...yet I have ordered many JB HiFi gift cards over the internet machine and everyone has always received them. After years of counselling I dont really worry as much as I used to.

I cant help out with booking a Boeing 737 to two destinations to visit people as I have no desire to fly after years of the awful anxiety that became worse because I kept on confronting all of my fears

There are many helpful posts above as you have noticed....I dont think my post offers a great deal of help..doh!

You are that far removed from pathetic or embarrassing I dont know where to start Moon...Strong....yes!...Determined...yes!...Independent...Yes!.....Intelligent and wise....Yes!

you are a legend Moon....seriously 🙂

my kindest always.....and bearhugs too!

Paul

[Moonstruck]

Hi BlondGuy.....Happy New Year!

Thank you so much for those great adjectives you used to describe me...I don't really deserve them any more...because I confess, re the two separate destinations and having to time the arrivals and departures etc...it "did my head in" and I chickened out of one of them...and plan to go on two separate trips. just a month or so apart.

That way I can give all my concentration to each of the visits as they deserve....(you can see I am trying to find excuses for my weakness and failure to accomplish what others can do in an instant without giving it a thought)

I hate this about myself...getting fazed by everyday things and situations....hate it!!

I was getting so anxious about it, that is what I decided....to do 2 separate visits, 2 separate itineraries which I know I can handle.

I was afraid all the travel would make me so very tired and I am dealing also with at times, severe, pain in my hip and lower back.

I can't "do" as much as when I was younger....but again, I feel I am just "making excuses" for myself when the real truth could probably be I am letting my anxiety rule my life...again!!! I feel so guilty for not having the guts to see the whole thing through...as I originally planned..I am disappointed in myself.

[Elizabeth CP]

Hi Moonstruck, If I said what you just posted to my psych he would remind me that I need to be sensible & look after myself. Doing 2 separate trips means you are able to enjoy each one including managing the trip itself & enjoying the time with your family. Rather than making excuses you are making very rational decisions.

Like you I get annoyed that I can't do things like I could when I was younger& get very frustrated with myself but I'm being forced to learn that I need to accept my limitations even if I don't like them. Yesterday my daughter invited me to spend time with her family at a science museum. Something I love doing! unfortunately I was very tired & feeling the effects of the day before which was hot & extreme fire danger which triggers my PTSD. I decided to meet them later so I could enjoy NYE with them without undue pressure. I had to remind myself that pushing myself to do everything would have just escalated stress levels & anxiety so I'f feel terrible & spoil things for my family!!

Far from letting your anxiety rule your life you are taking steps to ensure it doesn't spoil your trips both for now and in the future. Good on you!!!!

[Hanna3]

Hi Moon, hope I'm not butting in but making it into two separate trips sounds a great idea! So you are pacing yourself and reducing the stress. I think that's a terrific idea. Plane travel is tiring so much better to realize you're overwhelmed and may get over tired and reduce the stress to one trip at a time. Well done!

See you're getting there and finding ways to get things sorted bit by bit! Cheers mate you are doing great.