Is it anxiety

El4 · ‎15-10-2017

I haven’t really told anyone what’s REALLY going on. It’s been a while since I started to feel like this. Orginialy I thought it was just me being a teenager but what I feel like it’s more than that. When ever something happens I can’t get it if my mind, I tried talking to my mum but she just said I was over thinking it. But I never did this before. It all started when my best friend moved away and then my group broke up and now I feel alone. Whenever someone looks at me funny I start to overthink it and then I feel my heart pick up and I get hot. I can’t sleep sometimes. I just want to go back to normal but I can’t. I started to think that maybe I have anxiety but then I felt bad for over reacting. Some things make me feel sick when I see them but then is that just normal? Idk what to do.....

Croix · ‎15-10-2017

Dear El4~

Thank you for coming here, a pretty good move as you can get other's experiences to help guide you.

As someone what has had an anxiety condition, plus a couple of other illnesses, for a long time I can say that when it first started one of the most confusing things was not knowing what was normal, what was me and what was illness. In fact the possibility of illness never entered my head for a long time, I just thought it was me.

As I result I can understand what you are going though. Thoughts that won't go away, as you worry about something that has happened - replaying it in your mind. Endlessly analyzing what others are thinking, getting the heart going into overdrive and getting hot sensations all over, feeling sick at times too. Plus poor sleep, just lying there mind churning.

I improved, but not by myself. So if I was in your shoes I'd book a long appointment with a GP and explain all that has been happening since your best find left and the group broke up. See what happens. Hopefully you will get therapy to do yourself to get control of these thoughts and reactions.

I'd suggest having a read about anxiety, its symptoms and treatments in The Facts menu above. Also you can browse the Anxiety section of This Forum to see how others have coped.

A good starting place might be:

Forums / Anxiety / SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING ANXIETY

Talking to your mum might be OK, but unless someone has experienced the same thing for themselves it is very difficult for them to understand and many would just say what she did. Perhaps if you showed her The Facts pages after you'd read them? I mention this as medical support is important but not everything. Having someone that understands, who you do not have to pretend with, is a real big help.

I would realy like it if you came back and said what you thought

Croix

Hope_for_the_best · ‎15-10-2017

Welcome to the forum, El4! It does sound like you are getting anxious after you lose touch with your social network. It seems that you somehow regard that as your fault and that's probably why you start to worry when someone looks at you differently. Please reassure yourself that it is not your fault that your best friend moved away, and you are not responsible for the break up of the group after that. With the technologies nowadays, you can easily catch up with your best friend even though you two are living far apart. So you don't have to be lonely. I suggest that you talk it through with a counsellor. There are heaps of helplines for teenagers out there, e.g. Kids helpline and Headspace. I would also suggest that you remain socially active and know more new friends. That way you get your life as occupied as before, so you don't have the time to stress about your friend moved away etc.

If your stress is getting into the way of your daily life, then you should consult your GP. Hope that helps.

El4 · ‎16-10-2017

Thank you both for making me feel less alone. I contacted kids help line and I have decided to tell my parents but through a letter. I am terrified what they are going to say or how they are going to react. I don’t know when to tell them. I will try to tell them tonight. Wish me luck! 😟😫

Croix · ‎16-10-2017

Dear El4~

I'm glad you contacted Kids Help Line, a very sensible thing to do. I hope they were helpful (they usually are)

That sounds a pretty good way to approach your mum and dad. You get to put things down without the hassle of face to face.

Most parents love their children a lot and want the best for them. When something like this comes along a parent can feel lost and helpless, not knowing what they should do, or even if they might have done something wrong.

It may sound funny but sometimes one needs to have patience with the people you tell, even though you are the one with the illness.

I think we would all like to know how you get on

Croix

startingnew · ‎16-10-2017

hi El and welcome to BB

good luck for tonight, we are here for you. try to be as honest as you can either in person or in the letter. alot of parent jsut want the best for their kids so please try to talk to them.

good luck! looking forward to hearing how you get on

Hope_for_the_best · ‎16-10-2017

Good to hear that you talked things through with Kids Helpline. It is certainly a good thing to tell your parents, so they can be by your side to support you. If you miss your best friend, why not make contact with him/her regularly? I had one of my best friends studying in Canada while I was studying here (in Australia). Back then, we pretty much kept in touch through msn only. At that time, there were no whatsapp etc. and skype was not that popular. We decided to have a phone conversation at some stages because we could not bother with too much typing and online video calling was simply hopeless (terrible reception!). Toronto is 15 hours behind Sydney, and it took us quite a while to work out the best time of calling. Turned out, she made her call at bedtime on Friday, and it's lunch time on Saturday here!

You can keep in touch with your best friend easily with the technologies these days.

El4 · ‎16-10-2017

after telling my parents I feel like a wait has been lifted off my shoulders but at the same time I feel like I am just about to hit the gym. They took it well but I still feel like they don’t fully understand it like Croix said I guess it takes patience. To answer you question Hope.for.the.best yes i keep in touch with her but it’s different from seeing her everyday to zero. I am going to try and make a day every week where we call each other. Do you guys feel like I need to leave my parents to figure it all out? Thank you all again for helping me!

Hope_for_the_best · ‎16-10-2017

I am glad to hear that you feel better after telling your parents. If you feel like hitting the gum, by all means, go for it. Exercise helps you to relax and you can probably know some new friends there.

I totally understand the sadness of getting separated from your best friend. I have been through your age and it was certainly a big thing back then. You are not overreacted at all. Your parents may not totally understand because of generation gap, and that they have gone through a lot of separations like this in their lives. At their ages, it's no longer a big deal. As you grow older, you will realise that we all move on our lives in different directions, and it is uncommon to have your best friend always around you. Sadly, that's life! As Croix says, being patient is the key. It is a good sign that they take you well, and I am sure that they will try their best to understand you. And yes, do keep in touch with your best friend regularly. I bet your she will somehow come back for a visit? Or maybe you can go and visit her at some stages.

startingnew · ‎16-10-2017

hi El well done on speaking to your parents! thats a big help and now they know how you really feel as well!