I want my life back

[RB33]

Hi Team

I'm glad I have found a place where people may be able to help make sense of what's happening in my mind and body.

The last 4-5 years off and on I have been living with this demon that seems to show its ugly face for no reason at all - it's like a panic attack more than anxiety but I guess panic attacks is anxiety out of control?  

The biggest syptom I have is my breathing, I have this horrible fear of choking and not been able to breath, other times I have gas in my stomach and it can get uncomfortable but for some reason that turns into me thinking I can't breath, than the fear of dieng and cardiac arrest takes over and it is a tough battle to regain control over my mind and body, but what I can't work out im not unhappy or worried about my life? im excited about life but this thing is destroying me

These last 6 months its been on my mind so much I can not live a normal exsistence - I have never told anyone about this but I recently moved in with my girl friend so she has now seen the real me which for me is very confronting - She was very surprised the first time it happen and did not take it well but I think it was more because she was so surprised as I am a very relaxed person who most of the time is having a laugh - but now she is very understanding, she holds my hand and tells me to breath, I know she fully doesn't get why I can't over power it but she has been really good the few times its happen.

I'm 32 years old I'm an entrepreneur who wants to to live life to the fullest, but recently I can't get through a full day out in a scocial or non social enviroment with out having fear of loosing breath and having this feeling of fear, 

My girl friend is a medical student and things she sees a pattern - she says to stop drinking caffene, wine and beer, which I have started to do but not a big drinker any way. Excercise helps but does not destroy it.

Has any one ever made diet changes to help with anxiety? and it worked, could something be missing in my diet?

I love life and I'm very grateful for the one I have - I don't understand why I have this problem - I need to take these chains off so I can get back to living my journey on this planet 

[White_Rose]

Hello RB33

Welcome to the BB forum. I am interested in your post as I have had panic attacks in the past and can relate to your experiences. It happens at the most unexpected times and for no apparent  reason. And yet it can be a devastating experience.  I have ended up in hospital on several occasions because of this terror.

It's possible that it is linked to diet though I have not considered this before. In fact no medical professional, doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist, has ever suggested this. I do see how alcohol and caffeine could make you a bit 'up' and trigger a panic attack but if you drink either or both in small quantities it seems unlikely.

I suggest you go and see your doctor. I know it's advice that is frequently given on BB but it is valid. Panic attacks and the fear of them happening can have a huge and unpleasant impact on your life.

I just had a thought on re-reading your post that it may be the pressure of your work that is causing these episodes. People who are depressed or anxious often wear a mask in public to hide behind and this is hard work to maintain. It takes a lot of energy which is needed for daily living. I am not suggesting you are clinically depressed or anxious, but maybe a little unsure. In any event it would be good to get this checked out.

I will be happy to talk further with you. Perhaps you will write in again.

Regards

Mary

[Angel87]

Hi, how are you going with your anxiety?

 I have a similar issue, I'm always a very happy, positive person but lately I've been suffering anxiety & I don't know how to stop it.

I am constantly struggling to take a deep breath pretty much all day, it is constantly on my mind & therefore it is affecting my life. I use to love work, now it just makes my anxiety worse. I have been catching the bus to and from work everyday for the last 7 years, now all of a sudden it gives me anxiety. I use to love going to bed, now I'm worried because I go to bed & lay there thinking about my breathing.

Ive changed my diet to be more heathy, I am not a big drinker either & I'm trying to exercise everyday & still havent noticed a difference 😞

[White_Rose]

Hello Angel

Welcome to Beyond Blue. Yes, breathing is such an essential function in our lives but we take it for granted and only when something gets in the way do we worry.

Of course it's not that we cannot breathe, it's the anxiety that seems to almost paralyse the chest muscles and stop the lungs from working.

So RB33 and Angel, how are you going? An exercise I used when I had panic attacks was to imagine the panic as a black, prickly thing. It was on the bank of a river, dancing up and down and shouting at me to join it. I am in a boat floating down the river. Just sitting in the boat and watching the river bank slide past, including the panic figure. And as my boat glides along so my panic reduces in size and finally disappears.

It takes a little time to remember to bring this to your mind and to concentrate on being in the boat drifting down the river. But it works for me. You may be able to work with this image or find a different image to concentrate on.

I found a very good book called Living With It by Bev Aisbett. 'It" is anxiety. It's a small book and easy to read with some amusing but pointed cartoons. I do recommend that you read it. There are a couple of follow-up books as well, but the first one is the best.

I hope you will both write in again.

Mary

[RB33]

Hi Mary and Angel

Thanks for taking the time to reply to me

My panic attacks have calmed down - I have not had a full blown panic attack since I first wrote on the forum, it has come on once or twice but I'm much better at controlling it and have learnt to control my breathing much better.

Mary I'm surprised no professional has mentioned anything about diet to you, I'm lucky enough to be around a few doctors who have told me there can be links and ive had in depth conversations with them (also done some of my own research)

I no longer drink caffiene and it's been months since I've had a beer, I have doubled my exercise as well - these things have certianly helped me get better, at one point I thought I was loosing my mind. I have also started eating allot more foods with B vitamins in them, 

I still do get the panic feeling after I eat - i still get uncomfortable and try to avoid going out for dinner with friends - its strange because when I eat dinner at home alone I normally don't have much of an issue.

I know I have more stress in my life than some others - My business, Money and even being in my first long term relationship might be taking its toll - I'm not sure, but I'm not afraid of failing in my mind, I don't even know I'm anxouis until I have a panic attack

I'm slowly gaining more control - but it's still hovering

How are you Angel? 

[White_Rose]

Hello RB33

Good to hear from you again. I was thinking about your diet comment and realised I have had discussions about what I eat. It has been along the lines of eating a healthy diet with fresh vegies, meat etc. I also have type II diabetes so my GP checks various vitamin levels and thyroid periodically. I discovered my vitamin D was low so I take tablets.

My first thought was that I should get out in the sun more as this is where we get it from. But this was vetoed on the grounds of skin cancer. It's not that I can't or don't go out in the sun, I just limit my exposure because I find too much heat uncomfortable. So yes, we can experience a lack of some chemicals such as vitamins. I think the best way to check these is with a blood test.

For example, if you take extra Vit C any excess simply leaves the body via the bladder, so you could flush a lot of money away buying pills. At one stage I had a Vit B deficiency. So I thought I would be told to take tablets. Not so said my doctor. Vitamin B is absorbed at the very end of the digestive process. If your body does not extract it then, having more will mean more is not extracted and absorbed. Instead I had Vit B injections, straight into the blood stream. And I only needed them for a few months.

So self diagnosis may very well be inaccurate at best and needlessly expensive at worst. If you have concerns, get yourself checked out.

It's good the your panic attacks have decreased. Keep up the good work. I have to say I am fascinated by the concept of panic after eating. Whoops, don't mean to sound callous, I find it curious. Since you are better when eating at home is it possible that your anxiety is not related to eating but more to being away from familiar surroundings?

And the same reasoning may apply to anything that is not a familiar situation, such as your new relationship. It may sound easy to decide to live with someone but the reality can be quite difficult to accommodate. My 18 yo grandson came to live with me about a year ago for reasons relating to his work and travel. After the honeymoon period I realised how difficult it is to share my home with someone after spending 14 years on my own.

Keep posting

Cheers

Mary

[Angel87]

Hi RB33,

I am pleased to hear you're controlling your attacks better. Unfortunately I haven't had much progress. I can't seem to work out what triggers my attacks. I think I may need to go see a psychologist and/or go back to my doctor for some medication.

I know the difficulty breathing problem started over anxiety with my grandmother's passing, but now I constantly keep thinking about my breathing everyday & when I think of it it comes back 😞 it's a vicious cycle. It's taken over my whole life & I don't know how to stop it.

All the best with your progress.