I just need to vent (or why isn't anyone listening)

[silicontrip]

I've been dealing with many different things since the last time I posted and it's all just now that I need to get it out.

Yesterday I got a call from our rental agent that the owner is selling and we have 60 days to get out of the property. I've only had very bad experiences with moving as a child, associated with my mum having a relationship breakup and then moving into whatever she could afford by herself. As a consolation I'd get a new computer, so technology is my safe place. I never felt secure anywhere, until I bought my own place (something about high water and hell...) until my current wife, who didn't like the property, said we should rent. I admit the location was much more convenient but I never felt safe or secure. Dreading what happened yesterday (I probably just manifested that) when I came home trying my best to keep my anxiety under control, in front of the kids. My wife did state, "why are you so stressed, I'm the one who will have to do all the work" to which I was so stressed that I couldn't coherently remind her of how moving has been for me. She isn't listening.

oh wow, I've run out of characters for my next concern but wait there's more (I wanted to get it all out) ... I feel that this online forum engine isn't listening.

frustrated, sad, alone. No one is listening.

(not proof reading it either, you'll just have to deal with spelling mistakes, typos an incorrect use of you're and they're)

[jtjt_4862]

Hi silicontrip,

Thank you for posting your words on the forums. Sorry to hear that you're feeling this way about your rent. Would you like to talk more about your bad experiences from moving as a child? It must've been really tough for you and your mom when she was going through a relationship break up while managing a move to whatever place she could afford. Break ups can cause a lot of mental stress to a person, that interferes with their everyday activities, and I feel would've been one of the contributing factors to why you had a terrible experience from your move as a child. I'm happy to listen to more if you'd like to share.

The insecurity from having to rent a location is understandable, because something like what you're going through can happen to anyone really. It's a risk for anyone who's renting that they could be evicted out of their property with very short notice, just because the owner decides to sell their property... But to add on the terrible move experience that you had when you were a child, that must be really hard on you...

Please do share more if you'd like silicontrip. You're not alone buddy, and I'm all ears for you.

Jt

[Pumpkinella]

Hi silicontrip,

Sounds like a really stressful situation and it sounds like you and your partner are stressed out for different reasons. You are concerned about the lack of security coming from your childhood and your partner is concerned about all the work/stress that goes into moving.

Maybe a good way forward might be to try to have a conversation with her that can help alleviate both your stressors. You could discuss the work load and see how you both can manage it and or get some help from others, and you can openly discuss how this is an emotional trigger for you that makes you feel insecure. It is best to discuss this at a good time when you are both calm, rather than in a state of reaction. Perhaps that's why you found it difficult to formulate words - because you were reacting to her stress and felt bad bringing it up?

Might also help to see someone and have a few sessions it might help you deal with the trigger, its amazing what a few good strategies can do to help you cope. It sounds like a really difficult time and I hope you feel better soon!!!!!