Help please with anxiety (I think)

[Mfxd]

Good day

I believe I have suffered from anxiety throughout my life in its entirety but within the last 2.5 years it has spiraled out of control and I feel at a completely loss, I feel like I am going insane and that there is nothing to help me.

I worry. A lot. And I don't have much to worry about really, as I am a stay at home Dad with a wonderful wife and young son. When my wife became pregnant (planned) I spiraled in to anxiety and developed all kinds of physical pain that gave me a means I now realize to escape from participating in situations I did not enjoy. This has developed (despite seeing a psychologist on and off under mental health plan). Last year we had a cockroach infestation in our apartment that came when my wife went back to work, so coupled together both situations sent me in to a panic and months after they were gone I was spending at least half an hour every day for the last year checking for roaches. It was and absolute obsession. I could not enjoy playing with my son, nor could I sleep well or enjoy cooking etc.

we built a beautiful house over the last year in an amazing suburb and I just cannot enjoy it. Money is tight with the loan etc. but the thing is that bugs come with a house, ants are getting in to the kitchen and I'm focussing my obsession on to these new bugs  & am losing the ability to focus on the good things. The amazing house, the new 60" tv, my son (now don't panic, I don't neglect him at all I just sometimes feel like my interactions have become that of a robot performing functions than the loving parent I am). I am fighting with my wife, and not because she doesn't understand or at least try to, but I don't have many if any friends and she is overwhelmed trying to manage everything including her mildly nutty husband.

I have rational thought, I know what is going on and that my behaviors are out of control but I can't seem to reign them in to normality.

I live in in metro Melbourne, and I'm desperate to find a psychologist that can might help. I'm contacting ADAVIC tomorrow & plan to attend one of their support groups next week. If anybody cn even provide words that let me know I'm not going loco & that help is out there I'd be grateful.

i called beyondblue earlier today but other than a few basic resources found that sadly the person I was speaking to seemed to lack any empathy or seemed to understand how I was feeling. I hope I can get a better response here,

cheers

MFXD

[Jo3]

Hi MFXD

It's great to see you have come on here for support.  I'm sorry to read that the person you spoke to didn't help you.

Can ADAVIC recommend a psych who can help you with the anxiety issues you are having.  It must be very hard for you to cope.

It will be good for you to join a support group next week, I'm sure that will be very helpful for you.

You're not going crazy.  Hopefully others on here will come on here and give you support.

Pls take care

Jo

[stormydaze_02]

Hi,

I'm not sure I can help much. I think I've also been suffering anxiety (and possibly depression) for quite some time, but I've ignored it - pretended it didn't exist (helpful!).

I hope you find a good psychologist. Maybe start by writing down all the good/positive things that you have, and trying to work through any negative thoughts. I'm working through something called MoodGym and I find that it helps me rationalise things somewhat.

My psychologist asks me to keep a 'mood diary'. I rate my mood from 1 to 10 (1 being the lowest) several times per day, and I try and find things that make me feel better (eg. coffee with friends, watching a movie - whatever).

I think for me, the worst part was admitting to anybody that I was suffering with this. I didn't tell my friends or family - I was absolutely mortified and completely embarrassed. Most still don't know.

Anyway, I wish you luck. It sounds like you really do need somebody to talk through a lot of this with! Have you been to your GP to ask for a mental health plan and referral to a psychologist?

[geoff]

dear Mfxd, from what you are experiencing is that with this anxiety you also have linked to this OCD, which has an obsession on continually checking of concerns which may not be there, but we still have to check, it's constant and can be very annoying.

I've had mine for 54 years and I wonder whether you have seen the video when you logon.

From what you say 'I have rational thought, I know what is going on and that my behaviours are out of control but I can't seem to reign them in to normality', this is exactly what OCD does to us, we are normal people but have this illness, which can seem to be illogical to those that don't experience our continual checking, continual washing of our hands or checking the locks far too often, but we can't help it, and it's formed by our anxiety.

I would click under 'resources' at the top and order all the printed material that BB can send out to you, it's free but it will explain OCD to your wife, and you 'nutty' NO WAY, but what I have learnt to do is hide all my habits, checking etc so that nobody can see me, because 50 odd years ago I was treated as an unstable person and laughed at.

There is an antidepressant SSRI type which I take and that's meant to help with the anxiety and with it the OCD.

Have a look at these sites or even google OCD and I would love to hear back from you. Geoff.

[Chris_B]

Hi Mfxd,

I'm sorry to hear you had a negative experience with our support service.   We take feedback like this very seriously and we ensure you it will be passed on to the relevant staff that manage our support service. Our support service will then investigate this matter further. If you are comfortable, we would appreciate if you could forward us a phone number so our support service can contact you if they need any more information to complete their investigation.    I will be in touch offline to facilitate this.  Once again, we extend our sincere apologies and we’d like to thank you for bringing this to our attention. 

In the meantime, our practitioner directory at the top left of the page should assist you in finding a psychologist in Melbourne.  It is also possible that some of your anxiety may have been triggered by becoming a new dad. This is not uncommon, just as it is for new mums.  Here is a link to a beyondblue resource for dads that you may find useful: https://www.bspg.com.au/dam/bsg/product?client=BEYONDBLUE&prodid=BL/0775&type=file

[sherb]

hi, this is my first posting, but when i read your comments, i just had to become involved, as i too have been suffering in silence for over 10 years now.

i am still too embarassed to talk to people about my recently diagnosed mental health issues. diagnosed as a mixture of depression/anxiety.

my anxiety has led to serial offending, and whilst i have attended and recently recommenced to see a counsellor, it has been medication that has me feeling good about myself again.

i am a very happily married mature aged man, who many say should know better, and i would punish myself by completely withdrawing from people, my head was all over the place and my body was in a knot. but you just put up with it.

i am continuing to seek help, and i am now about to see another counsellor more specific to anxiety offending.

i want to seek assistance, before everything is ruined.