Extreme Social Anxiety

[suffocating_in_silence]

I've been feeling really stressed and anxious for the last few months or maybe even year, because of one thing which is just talking. Being in high school makes it a very social environment, but everytime I try to talk my voice gets stuck up, I start being awkward and people get uncomfortable being around me. I have a lot to say, and want to say it but I just can't. I just want to have a happy high school life with friends I can joke around with, and have basic social skills so I can talk to anyone without being scared or anxious. I don't want to feel afraid of being myself at school, and talk normally when someone approaches me. I want to stop overthinking all the time about every small embaressing thing I do, or every awkward conversation I have. 

Thank you for taking your time to read this, and I hope whoever you are and where ever you are, you're doing well. 

[Bob_22]

Hi suffocating_in_silence,

Thanks so much for your post and kind message in the end. It has made my day. It sounds like you're struggling at school with expressing yourself freely. I can definitely relate to this and it is in fact very common amongst young people. As we are growing we are still learning about ourselves and trying to figure out our identity. This can make communicating and forming relationships very awkward.

One of the best things we can do is to talk to others who we find have a common interest with us. This is an easy conversation e.g. you both like a sport, you both like a certain subject at school, and also you are more likely to get along with these people since they share similar values. Once you have made some friends your confidence will grow and it will become easier to communicate in general. And if you wanted even futher help you can also consult with your school counsellor who can give you tips on communicating with others as well. 

Hope this helps,

Bob

[HelloGail]

Hi suffocating in si

I would recommend learning to do some gentle breathing and relaxation techniques and after a week of practising, it should come natural so when we want to share something with your school mates, a deep breath should kick in. It helped with my anxiety in my 30's. I wished I'd noticed younger as I was a lot like you and in fact reading your post it reminded me. Most High Schools have a counsellor, I would reach out to them for support. This is going to make you a stronger person as you enter adulthood. Here is an analogy: We have to put the sheets on the bed first before we place the douna on top and so it's similar with anxiety, we have to deal with the anxiety first (relaxation/deep breaths) and work on building your confidence. It is so hard the teenage years but we got through it and so will you. Be kind to yourself, give yourself time.

[JulieS101]

Hey, I was in a similar situation when I was in high school. Firstly, I totally get how you are feeling and I hope you are taking care of yourself and surrounding yourself with supportive people. I would recommend you see a therapist or counsellor for this as it seems like you have social anxiety and they could most likely help you address it. I hope you know that you are most likely judging yourself more than anyone is judging you and I hope you are not to hard on yourself.