Dreading work

[Jambo123]

Hi... Just joined tonight and reading some other posts has gave me the confidence to get this off my chest. I had a workplace injury about a year ago which resulted in an operation and light duties for a long period of time. I was treated well and done everything asked of me to the best of my capabilities. In the last month or so i have been back on full duties but hv felt a change in attitude from certain parties. During my light duties i was privy to a few instances where a certain manager lost his temper and verbally abused an employee. I felt uncomfortable and anxious being in earshot of this. Since back on full duties (.about a month) i hv been taken in to this managers office 3 times for differing reasons. He was belittling in his manner and has shattered my self esteem... I hv been moved to a lesser position and feel his eyes are on me constantly. I am not good with confrontation and am getting knots in my stomach.. Struggling to switch off my brain at nights afinding it increasingly difficult to drag myself from bed for my shifts. I hv called the employee assistance programme and have had one consultation... I hv also spoke to my gp and had a few days off recently when it all felt too much. I want to quit and find a job i can enjoy again but to compound matters i hv lost my license atm so i am stuck until i get my license back. It just feels totally hopeless and it is draining the life out of me.

[geoff]

hello Jambo, I'm sorry that all of this has happened but welcome you to the site.
From what you have said is that it may seem as though you have bullied and would this question with your employee assistance and would certainly pursue this issue, because it seems as though it's going to be pretty tough for you.
The time off given to you by your doctor, is what you really need, however I believe it's only going to make your situation at work that much harder.
I would be documenting everything you can remember, both the happy times but more so when you feel you have been victimised, you may need to use these at a later date, but look after yourself. Geoff.

[pawsy]

Hi Jambo, this sounds really tough. To have your self esteem damaged at work is very difficult because work is such a massive daily commitment. Sounds like you are doing all the right things though. Great that you are using employee assistance. I hope they can really assist you ... and make it bearable to be there. I know that thing of being unable to switch your brain off from a bad work situation. It's awful. How long til you get your license back? Working with toxic people in toxic work environment is a hideous thing to do, but/and everything can turn around again quickly, if you find a supportive, decent, workplace. Easier said than done though i know. Please post again and let us know how you are getting on. best wishes from pawsy

[Jambo123]

Thx pawsy... Again today i succumbed to my anxiety and called in sick. I hv made an appointment with gp for tomorrow to get some counceling face to face.

[Jambo123]

Thx geoff i am indeed keeping a diary of all events at work... Reading through it is making me feel like i am paranoid but the events have all actually happened.

[blondguy]

Hi Jambo

Thanks for having the courage to post! That makes you a strong and amazing person

You are like most of us here on the forums. We dont like confrontation either.

I have been in the private sector for many years and from what you have written you seem to have great talent that can be utilized elsewhere.

Pawsy and Geoff have provided some great noteworthy advice above.

Pawsy asked how long you have lost your license for.....If its okay can you let us know so we can help you more effectively?

Jambo mentioned "I hv made an appointment with gp for tomorrow to get some counceling face to face"

What you wrote is great stuff Jambo about your appointment. Good on you!

I hope you can let us know how you go 🙂

my kind thoughts

Paul

[pawsy]

Oh great Jambo. I hope the face to face counselling helps. It's important to get someone in your corner in troubled times. Let us know how it goes. best wishes from pawsy.

[luft_]

Hi Jambo,

Isn't it unfortunate how many workplaces operate? It seems like some people like power and bullying a lot. I have experienced it over and over again, and it really is draining and disheartening.

I have a story of my own to share with you.

I was reading my mother's diary from her teenage years (she let me), and I noticed she wrote a lot about the pain of seeing her father - a beautiful and kind man who was a fantastic grandfather - work in a factory where people really treat him terribly. He had come to Australia after WW2 and in the factories where he worked there was a lot of bullying, racism and he was later injured badly. Luckily he received worker's compensation and was able to retire, however essentially he spent over 30 years being paid very little making steel frames and things like that until then.

His dream was to keep travelling with my grandmother once he retired, but soon after he developed Alzheimer's Disease and was not able to enjoy the retirement he had hoped to have. Sadly he passed away after several years with Alzheimer's Disease.

I wish he had been able to do something different for a job - obviously for him he couldn't speak English very well and had only been educated up until year 5, so jobs were quite limited - but I wished he had lived a bit more of his life rather than have to put up with awful people at work, and before that live through a war and economic crisis.

My recommendation is to try your best to find something else - and see if there is any compensation that can be owed to you to soften the blow of the transition. It would be good to not jump into anything too quickly, but I think it would be great to work somewhere where you are valued.

I wish you all the best and hope you feel better soon,

LL

[Jambo123]

Thanks for your advice and sharing your story.... Yes i have more or less came to the conclusion that the mentality with manufacturing is not the best enviroment. I must admit i have been a bit disillusioned but i hung around as the shift work suited my circumstances and the money paid pretty good. But it is time to search for alternative employment but when the time suits me. I am not going to let bullying win the day. Also in the last 5 months they have changed the shift roster culminating with a severe drop in money ( about 25K ) . You are right time to move on and start afresh.

[Jambo123]

Hi paul... Ur kind words are appreciated and sorry i did seem to miss that question... I dont get my license back until december so still quite a way off yet and making seeking alternative employment for the time being difficult. I just need to tough it out best i can for the meantime. I have a friend who said he can get me a job with his employer once license back so that is the light at the end of the tunnel. Till then im not going to let the bullying persist.... I even feel the difference since posting on here... Just speaking about it as i am seperated and no family here its good to hv someone just to talk about it too and know im not alone and bottle it all up inside me.