Young, dumb and broken.

[BenD]

Hi all,

A few years ago I was a passenger involved in a drink driving accident. I was 18 at the time, stupid/naive, and it has impacted my life quite a lot. My left femur, right hip and pelvis have been screwed back together with metal implants, which has caused me arthritis and restricted my sporting ability. 

I grew up being a really good runner, finishing first for my age group in high school from the age of 15 to 17. If nothing else was going for me, it was something that I could hold onto and say that I was really good at.

Now I get pain in my legs whenever I try to run, leaving me unable to walk properly for days afterwards.

Probably just having a bad day, but it feels like the world can be damn cruel sometimes.

Ben

[Doolhof]

Hey Ben,

 EXCELLENT! Well done you for running in the marathon! You only made it to the 32 k.m. mark! Man! I am sometimes exhausted after driving 32 kilometres to my next client let alone thinking of trying to run that far!

It is 32 kilometres to one of the towns in our region from our home, every time I drive that route now  I will think of your amazing ability! I am so very,very proud of you Ben. I have a huge smile on my face thinking of your achievement, not just your running, but also for your determined and powerful desire to keep going.

I also know a bit about what it is like to feel like an outsider in life, I have not been able to have children, so have watched all my friends have kids and now some have grand children. I could have become bitter and twisted about that, instead I used every opportunity I could to be with other people's children and have had some wonderful experiences, shared a lot of love and happiness with hundreds of kids. Last night my niece wanted to sit next to me at her 22nd birthday dinner! How proud and honoured I felt!

So yes, tough, unpleasant stuff happens, but if we look through the hurt and the pain there is good stuff there as well.

You mentioned you are on the prescription drugs at 22 for the pain, I was drinking copious amounts of alcohol at 22 to deal with my pains. So stick to the prescription medication!

Some times people don't always understand or recognise the pain in others. I have not experienced cancer but my husband has. I have no idea of the concern he lives with that it may return one day. I have depression and chronic pain which are also real, but at times these things are not at all recognised as being anything but in my head by a lot of people. The main thing is that we know, and we can try to improve our own lives.

I really am so very proud of you Ben for all of your achievements and breakthroughs. I still have a huge smile on my face! You are an encouragement to me. I might go out and try for a 5 k.m. walk later today!

In this together? You bet! Well done,

Cheers to you

from Dools

[geoff]

dear Ben, well that's an achievement and a half 32 km, I can't even run to the corner but maybe after the next op I could.

With regard to the prescription drugs for this severe pain, well I hate pain, and the drugs that were given to me are addictive, so the doctor will only prescribe them for a certain time, and after that it's cut down to various types of pain relief, and I was also using alcohol, but I had to be careful in that I didn't fall over and dislodge my hip, so that would mean having another operation.

There were times in hospital when the pain relief had worn off, but you weren't allowed another injection until the time limit which was 4 hours had passed, so you to suffer with it until you were allowed another injection.

In this together you bet, and as they 'all the way with LBJ'. Geoff.

[Doolhof]

Hi Ben,

Hope your weekend went well, and you weren't suffering from too much pain after your marathon run! Sometimes we just have to get out there and do these things to prove to ourselves that we are still alive! I sometimes push my back too far and suffer from it, but the sense of achievement at the time out weighs the pain and the suffering after.

Just wanted to let you know I am thinking of you and hope you are progressing okay. It can be easy to have a bit of a downer after a high, and I hope that is not the case with you. Like when you go on an excellent holiday, then you come home and have to adjust to "normal" once more. It can sometimes take me a couple of days to get back into the swing of things. 

For me I also find it helpful to break the routine, and do something totally different so every day doesn't feel the same.

Hope all is okay with you,

  Cheers for now, from Dools