year 12 - unmotivated and frustrated

[n3v]

hi everyone,

this is my first time posting here so i was a bit hesitant but here i am. i'm currently in year 12 and i guess i'm approaching the halfway mark (completed term 4 and am currently nearing the end of week 7 term 1). i have always had issues with school even in primary school relating to the completion of any sort of schoolwork whether it be assessments, homework and studying. i thought this year would never come because it always seemed so unreachable but now that it's here i'm mentally, physically and emotionally drained more than ever. i don't really know how i'm going to be able to comfortably make it through the year and especially through my hsc exam period since i never have the motivation to do work and am always procrastinating to try and avoid from doing anything. however, i still want to relax and have as much fun as i can since it is the last year of high school but it's difficult with that constant thought of the hsc in the back of my mind.

i've given it much thought and i don't think i would want to go to university (even though my parents are expecting me to) so i know for a fact that the atar i get isn't exactly a 'be all and end all' situation for me but that still doesn't stop me from wanting to do well despite how i'm feeling. i've always felt that school just "wasn't it" for me if that makes sense. i'm the type of person who will only feel motivated to do things if it is something that i personally want to do and so sitting there studying or writing essays or sitting exams are things that i never want to do. this has resulted in me always completing things last minute and holding off completing schoolwork as long as i can. i feel as if i am at a point where i can't retain anything in my brain anymore because i don't have a desire to. i find myself reading a sentence to myself over and over again for 5 minutes because i just keep forgetting it (this is also the same for when i'm listening to someone talk - i will hear one sentence and try to remember it but then realise i hadn't been listening to everything else they have said). my vocabulary has never been extremely expansive or sophisticated but now i feel as if it is becoming even less so. i forget basic words often and i think my writing skills are getting worse. i'm behind on classwork and have had random moments where i start crying at home because of how frustrated i am. there's so much for me to say but so little characters - sorry if i'm ranting but i'm just stressed.

[ErinB]

Hi n3v,

Well done for reaching out. School can be really stressful, even when you enjoy it and are motivated to finish so it makes sense that you're having a particularly hard time right now. You've completed nearly 13 years of schooling and that's a massive achievement. You should be proud of yourself for that.

I know it's much easier said than done but you've only got 2 terms left and then you're finished. I think even if you don't want to go to University and aren't aiming for a certain ATAR you should still try to complete high school so you get your certificate. It makes it much easier for future jobs and if you choose to go to University later in life. Have you accessed any services at your school like counseling or tutoring? You should talk to a teacher or a principal and ask for any extra support you can get. They can help you better manage your time and get your work done when it's due or allow you extra time to complete tasks if you're under a lot of pressure.

I'm glad to hear that you still want to enjoy your last year of school. It's important to maintain a study/fun balance so you're allowing yourself to relax and do things you enjoy. Otherwise the stress can become too much and start having negative effects on your mental health.

All the best,

ErinB