Struggling with Anger and Sadness

[mehhh]

I've been struggling with trying to control my anger for a long, long time now and it's effecting my relationship as I lash out at random times for no apparent reason. I become filled with anger and cannot control what I say or do, I have no idea why I get so angry and I always regret what I say or do. Sometimes, I get so mad and just punch things or hurt myself in another way. I constantly say horrible things to my partner when I do get into this mood and it's really not okay.
After I have my massive rush of anger, I feel really really sad and I have no idea why. This combination happens constantly and I don't know what to do because I don't have the courage to speak to my GP and definitely not my mum. I talk to my girlfriend about it sometimes but that's the only time I ever actually talk about it.

[white knight]

Hi mehhh, welcome

Yes, it can be a vicious cycle as anyone with bipolar or depression knows because we are the ones with a diagnosis that has those symptoms in the extreme.

Gp's aren't that scary. If it wasn't for my GP in 2009 I wouldn't have been found to have the problems I have and frankly the small medication I'm on changed my life for the better- forever!. Imagine waves coming all the time of sadness and anger then you put in place a wall that slows it all down to lower waves. That's the effect of treatment no matter what that treatment is. It's just logical really. Like getting a mechanic to fix a car.

Humans aren't perfect, we all need fixing in some form or another, just that many people that need treatment don't ever get it. That means their loved ones suffer and your relationships will come and go quickly because people don't have the patience for bad behavior.

Fix it now mehhh, you wont look back.

All the best. TonyWK