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Struggling to get through life

Community Member

hi im 16 and im in year 11 this year and I hate it, I hate my school so much. It’s so draining. The students and teaches are all just so draining. The student hate each other but all pretend to be friends, there’s so much drama and fights and people just like to start stuff for no reason. A lot of the good teachers in my school have left and the teachers we have now don’t even know how to teach or just don’t bother, ie my math teacher hadn’t taught us all the content so when we went into our first assessment task most of us didn’t understand or know how to answer the questions (mind you he’s not even a proper math teacher, he’s a science teacher). It’s just gotten to the point where I just don’t like coming to school anymore, I don’t bother to do the work sometimes because I just mentally can’t I don’t even learn anything anymore (I walks out of lessons not knowing anything) and I just hate it so much where I would rather consider online learning. Some days I can’t even get up out of bed and I would just wish I would just die. But as coming from an immigrant family my mum won’t accept that, I’ve only came this far just for her. I’m not even here for my dreams I’m here for hers. I’m so stressed and overwhelmed where I don’t even want to finish high school and go to uni or complete my hsc, they put all of this stress and pressure on me to figure out what I want to do in life, that I’ve just given up. I just want to disappear, start a new name, new identity and a new life away from everything and everyone. No more school I just can’t anymore 

2 Replies 2

Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi prisoner number 68860762!


I've always felt that the most important years of school coincide with our most tumultuous stage of life.
Most of us simply succumb to the system and muddle through despite the banality and lackluster instruction (not teachers' fault entirely as they must follow the curriculum - a bit like you guys!).

But it does transpire to a real world (for the brave and strong), where you can reclaim your identity and pursue your own interests.

Until then, maximise (er, value add!) your time by asking questions to help make sense of it all.

Get together with a few classmates for assignments/discussion/assistance - you're all in the same boat, and solidarity should put things into perspective that this is just a process, flawed and inadequate as it may be.


Most of all, try to recognise the universality of struggle and seek an opportunity to share a kind word with your peers, parents, and teachers alike - a little investment often brings great reward.


Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Guest_68860762


Being a mum to a daughter who completed year 12 during COVID lockdowns and mental health challenges that came with that and while helping a son who struggled terribly through year 12 last year, I have to say I'm not a massive fan of the Australian Education System. While I found there are positives to it and some absolutely brilliant teachers, it can definitely have some depressing and anxiety inducing elements to it. I feel so deeply for you as you struggle through year 11 in a system that really needs a major overhaul.


Firstly, it's not your fault you can feel a number of faults in the system

  • It contains a community of people (students) who are not all educated on how to be conscious and considerate community members. With a six and a half hour day, you'd think from prep to year 12 there'd be at least one lesson a week on how manage life in a number of ways, including social skills, developing higher levels of consciousness and consideration, managing mental health challenges etc etc
  • Like you, my kids did well with really good teachers. They learned a lot and found the work relatable, based on good teaching skills. With the questionable teachers, they struggled greatly, especially my son. While my son had an excellent and incredibly considerate year 12 biology teacher, the poor teaching skills of his biology teacher who he had in years 10 and 11 meant he could never catch up to a year 12 standard no matter how much extra work his year 12 teacher put in to help him. One of my daughter's teachers frequently announced 'I don't even want to be here'. One teacher taught from Powerpoint slides, with virtually no elaboration on those slides and another would encourage the students to open up their text books and basically teach themselves. There's definitely something wrong with a system that has good and bad teachers and it's a matter of 'the luck of the draw' when it comes to who you get
  • Nowhere at the beginning of secondary school is there an education on what's in our nature and therefor what kind of paths might interest us in life, in the way of work. It's more like in year 10 the pressure's on to suddenly choose our course for the rest of our life, without considering what it's in our nature to do or what it's in our nature to enjoy in the way of work
  • If you're someone who learns easily through your imagination (something my son can relate to), the system's not always set up in a way that leads a student to learn this way. So, it doesn't necessarily appeal to a student's strengths or their best way of learning

In a system riddled with faults, it becomes a matter of how to work the system or systems in the school you're in. Sometimes it's also about addressing whether you need someone to advocate for you. For example, if you can't learn from the teachers you've got, it's your parents' role to advocate for you when it comes to you having only the best of teachers or moving you to a school where only the best of teachers are employed. While I employed a study coach/student organiser for my son, she was a brilliant advocate for him.


Some of my children's friends did year 12 unscored (basically about completing SACs 'til they passed them, with plenty of chances), some sat exams to gain an ATAR and one suffered so badly through the pressure to the point where he just couldn't cope anymore. An education is never worth losing our life over, never never never. It should never get to that point. If things have become unbearably depressing and anxiety inducing, your parents need to address this above all else. This should be their #1 priority, how to help you get through life, not just through school. As I said to my son 'If this is the hardest year of your life so far, you have to give yourself the credit you deserve when it comes to trying to manage it. And, remember, you should never have to face one of the hardest years of your life alone. It's always best done with guides and support'.