I've just
been asked over text by a friend to attend his formal at a 'prestigious' private boys school. I found the contents of the text rude initially, and
declined, however, I fear I may have overreacted and am worried that I
made the wrong decision. He's quite a shy guy with a strict
overbearing mother so most of our friendship has been via email. He's
a decent guy, if extremely sheltered and a bit egotistical. We both go to decently ranked schools, despite me going to an academically selective school,
he's always seemed to look down at me and think that I'm stupid. He has also made passive-aggressive comments in the past about
how I'm broke eg I asked him for restaurant recommendations in the suburb he
lives in and he suggests place known to be dirt cheap, saying, "it's quite expensive
so I'm not sure if you'll be able to afford it."
Back to the
situation at hand, so he texts me to ask if I'm interested in attending his
formal, to which I say yes. Note that he asks if I want to attend, not
specifying with him. Then he texts "Umm okay" with the date of the
formal. I then say that I will let him know if I am free on that date as I am
currently walking my dog and away from my calendar. To which he says "to
be honest, I didn't expect you to reply so soon, since we have HSC exams coming up". My immediate reaction was confusion followed by
annoyance as I did view it as a backhanded insult- as if suggesting that I
wasn't studying enough because I was able to reply to his texts or suggesting I was wrong
for walking my dog instead of studying. I genuinely cannot tell if he is just
not used to social interaction or if he was making a pass at me (note: the
first time he went out without his parents was when he was 17, his mother
barely allows him to go out, I have asked to hang in the past and he has always
said that his mother won't let him, we have never spent time together outside
of church events (because his mother won't let us) and a few years he invited
me to another formal before un-inviting me a day later because his mum
"won't let him date"
I can't tell if he genuinely wants
to attend with me or if I'm just a sort of "trophy" for him to bring
(at this private boys school, if a boy attends without a date he will receive
lots of judgement) my friends tell me that he probably
wouldn't look after me at the formal and that we would probably sit in silence
the whole time. I keep overthinking whether or not I should have accepted, should I try to fix things?
