My Problems. I Need Some Help And Opinions.

[Raimu8]

Hi. I'm a teenage girl who has no idea what's happening to them. Yes, I'm young, and yes, maybe these emotions are just from hormonal changes and puberty. Even so, I wanted other people's opinions, as I can't seem to discuss this topic with my friends, who don't take mental issues seriously. I don't really understand how I feel. But, I just really hate myself. I constantly feel so low and tired and I stress over the fact that I have no one to talk to. I don't want to go to school, I don't want to talk to anyone, I'm losing interest in most of my hobbies. To be honest, I do think there's something wrong with me.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not suicidal. I don't want to die, or hurt myself. I just hate being where I am. My friends kind of make fun of these kinds of things and ironically take online tests. I know they won't prove anything but my results are 100% always moderate depression, OCD, anxiety, social paranoia, all those things. I just don't know anymore.
Sometimes, I cry, for no reason at all. When I'm crying, I always wonder: 'What's my body trying to tell me?' Is this... A bad thing? Do I actually have a problem?
I hate the fact that people would try to help me, I just feel like a waste of space and a burden when people try to help me or ask me if I'm okay. But deep down, I don't know, maybe I wanted someone to just... Understand? Where I'm coming from without me having to say. Know when I'm not feeling well and just help me without a word. But, I know that's all just an unrealistic child's dream.
But is this just because of puberty? Am I just 'being my age'? I just wanted some opinions. Thanks.

[quirkywords]

Raimu8

Welcome to the forum. This community is full of kind, caring, friendly, nonjudgmental people.

I am not a medically trained person, I have been a teenage girl , a quite a few decades ago and have lived experience with mental health.

As you have written and know being a teenager is full of highs and lows and exaggerated emotions so working out what is happening can be difficult and take time.

Have you spoken to your parents or to a trusted teacher or a school counsellor and if not would you think about that or speaking to your doctor? You mention you don't want to go to school, but are you managing to go to school despite not feeling like going?

Crying as a teenage girl is very common I would say .

I can see you an intelligent and thoughtful person.

You have written a very clear and well expressed post.

I have asked a few questions so I can help you some more.

Take care

Quirky

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Raimu8,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out and being here. I'm sorry that you're struggling with this but glad that you decided to post.

Is this puberty? Is this a bad thing? My answer: does it really matter if it's a puberty or age thing? What matters to me is that it's happening and it's affecting your mood. Hormones are a pain, but they don't have to make you squash down your feelings. Your feelings still matter. Crying still matters. Those thoughts of you hating being where you are still matters.

You said in your post that you'd like people to know when you're not feeling well and help you without a word - what would that look like if it could happen? Either way, if you were to reach out for help and say that you're not okay, it wouldn't make you a burden. All it would make you is a person who reached out for help - and that's totally and completely okay.

[grilledcheese]

Hey Raimu,

From your description at least, I can relate so much to your situation, from the tests to the sureness that you aren't at the point of considering suicide and wondering whether you are exaggerating your situation, to the fatigue. I am 20 now but started to wonder these sorts of things at around 13. I used to cry a lot, sometimes I felt like it was for no reason, sometimes when I looked in the mirror and sometimes when I was just talking about a topic I was particularly passionate about (still do this last one a bit haha). I have since been diagnosed with depression but this doesn't necessarily mean you have depression. But I do think that it means you should speak to a professional if you feel comfortable doing so - a GP and then maybe they can refer you to a psych if they think you should see one - there is always a chance that this is something beyond hormones and puberty so its definitely worth doing.

That being said, a particular sentence from romantic_thi3f really struck me "Does it really matter if it's a puberty or age thing? What matters to me is that it's happening and it's affecting your mood." Even if it is puberty, I know the hurt that you're feeling and you shouldn't have to deal with it by yourself. Trust me, I know it is hard to take someone's word for it, but anyone who cares enough to offer help, would never consider you a burden! I didn't talk to anyone for a long time, largely because I didn't want to stress my parents out and I think it really would have helped if I had, even doing what you're doing by posting on the forum is a great step! You sound super logical and mature, which sometimes doesn't help because it leads to us overthinking things and we end up reasoning too much to the point that we wonder if our issues are even issues. But honestly, try talking to someone, even a friend, family member, school councillor etc. just so that you have someone on your side and take it from there. I'm happy to chat more if it'd help, I get the sense that I might know where you're coming from!

Good luck!!

~Grilledcheese