Just done with everything

Jeevesbe · ‎23-03-2018

Today I turned 18 and I'm in my last year of High school, after getting no support from the school with my anixety and depression even at the worst of times I relyed on my friends too much and now they have given up on me aswell and even tell me to quit school so their scores don't get marked down at all, so I quit that school but now the new school I was ment to start at says I can't change schools mid year and as such I'm a giant ball of stress sitting up at 1 in the morning crying for the first time in 4 years because I have no clue what to do and am just so done with people and yet crave attention and just can't deal with anything anymore, no job, no school, no friends I have nothing and honestly don't know what to do

Croix · ‎25-03-2018

Dear Jeevesbe~

Welcome back, it's been a year or so and I'm sorry to hear that life is not good. Having anxiety and depression is a huge burden and colors everything in life. Sadly it also affects how one behaves. I have a feeling that leaving school might have been in the hope of leaving some of the pain behind, a great pity it did not work out.

May I ask if you are still seeing the GP, psychologist and psychiatrist you mentioned in your first post? If so I would suggest you need to talk with them as their efforts do not seem to be that effective. It often happens, you get set up on a regime and over time circumstances - and even you - change, so the regime needs to be adjusted too.

I don't think anywhere you have mentioned your family. Do you have one? If so how do you get on with them? Trying to soldier on all by oneself is very hard and most people do need to talk with those that care and want to support them.

I'm not sure what you do about school, missing a year seems a really bad thing. I'd imagine after a year away it would be very hard to pick up your studies, and being cut off from people for that length of time would do you no good either. What do you think you should do?

I know it is easy to say but try not to read too much into those so called friends. If they are only concerned about their own progress than they are simply acquaintances, not real friends. School is full of acquaintances to hang around with, however they do melt away when things are tough. Proper friendships are rarer and only happen infrequently. This is a hard thing to realize, one wants friendship, to give as well as receive, after all.

I went to over half a dozen schools and in each were kids who I got on with (plus others I did not of course), but real friendships came later on after I'd left.

Life can be a lot better than what you are going though right now. I can relate to those 1am feelings and the rest and I've reached a much better life now

Please come back and talk more, we do care

Croix

Jeevesbe · ‎29-03-2018

I have been working a plan out with my GP, psychologist and psychiatrist about how to tackle this problem of school and has been on the up recently, I'm planning to take a sort of gap year and then go back next year.

As for family I don't really have anyone to talk to as my dad is a hard work kinda guy, my mum also has depression and seeing or hearing about my depression feeds into hers so I avoid that, I have an older brother but we never really got along untill recently when he moved out,

I've come to realise that I had always had that feeling of they aren't really friends more just people at school as we never really did anything outside of school together, I hope I can get to a point where It's better like you

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply and I hope your having a wonderful day

grapefruit · ‎29-03-2018

Hi Jeevesbe,

Hope you're holding up ok. It seems like a really tough position to be in. Good on you for asking for help.

I don't know why your new school won't let you join in the middle of the year. It's only March still, and your class credits should be transferable. It seems unfair and I'd recommend taking it up with the department in charge of education in your state. Staying home with nothing to do for an extended period certainly isn't ideal. However if you appeal and they still don't let you start until next year, it is possible for you to use that time as an opportunity.

1. Seek help for your mental health. Seeing a GP or mental health service should be a good start.

2. Look for work. Depending on your financial situation, you could look for paid work, volunteer work or a mix of both. Not just for money, but because having somewhere to go and people to interact with regularly is important.

3. Study study study. Use that time to get a good handle on the curriculum, decide which subjects you'll do, and get a bit of background knowledge on them. There are lots of resources online that can help, and studying even a bit will give you a head start when you continue with year 12.

Dealing with this kind of major setback in your education is hard enough, without the added burden of depression, anxiety. I'd like to emphasize that it's so important for your mental health to maintain a regular schedule, sleeping and waking at regular times, and keeping yourself occupied and healthy.

Hope to hear from you soon!

-Grapefruit

Chloe_M · ‎06-04-2018

Hi Jeevesbe,

I'm sorry to hear that your life is so hard for you at the moment. I think that the best thing to do would be to seek professional help. Exercising or doing something that you love will also boost your happiness. I find that when I dance, my anxiety is less noticeable, so I dance long hours everyday.

That really sucks that your friends gave up up on you. Have you got any other close friends outside of school? A family friend or a close cousin or something that you could talk to?

I think that gap year would be good for you; a time maybe for you to let go of your stress/worries and have fun? But right now, try and focus on getting through year twelve. If you haven't already, there is a thread pinned to the top of the list to do with studying and tips for it. If you are having trouble focusing on schoolwork then maybe you should check that out.

Thank you for reaching out to us... We are happy to help in the small way that we can 🙂

Chloe_M