i missed my school presentations because of myself

[teatime_alltime]

I wasn't sure where to post this because now that I think about it, this situation sounds more like a stupid excuse than anything. I'm supposed to be at school right now doing my presentations for some subjects, but I'm at home, why?

Because I didn't finish the scripts for them. And yes, it was partially to do with the fact that I procrastinated, but I really wanted to finish it all last night and I somehow didn't. Usually, I get my school work done on time, but lately, I haven't been getting anything done on time at all, and it's been bothering me to no end.

I used to work well, but somehow that doesn't work anymore. I get distracted and I don't have any motivation to finish the work. I get worried about the outcome of the grade and I don't trust myself.

I think for a while I've had some underlying mental health and commitment issues. I know that I am definitely an obsessive worrier. I always overthink many situations to the point where I scare myself into not doing something, which makes me withdraw further away from asking for help. For example, to authenticate that I missed my presentations and to do them later, I need to hand in a doctor's certificate. What I am going to tell the doctor? "I didn't finish my assignments because I was too worried that I wouldn't do well so I stayed home instead to avoid doing the presentation?" What if they say no? What will I do then? (This example was actually the whole point I decided to write this post for help;;;) These kinds of thoughts make me end up lying to people about my real situation and it just adds onto the worries that have already accumulated, which does not make my head any lighter from carrying the worries.

I'd also a high-achieving student, so I pride myself on being smart and knowing things because, without that, I'm not sure what else I have. Sure, I may be nice to people on a surface level, but most of the time, I make friends with the intention of using them to help myself get a better reputation in school and just in general look like a decent human being.

I don't know what to do, and at this point, this post has become a vent post.

Anyway, what should I do about the presentation issue? Should I just ask my dad to take me to a doctor and to ask them if they're willing to give me a medical certificate to excuse me for today? I still need a legitimate reason, and I'm scared to talk to my school counsellors about it just in case they don't let me do my presentation and fail me instead for it.

[SarahZ]

Hey teatime_alltime,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out. I'm really sorry to hear about your feelings of lack of motivation recently and how you find this impacting your ability to complete your presentations. I can also definitely see how this is making you anxious about finding a way to explain this to your parents and even the doctor. In my opinion, I think it's a perfectly legitimate explanation that you haven't been feeling yourself recently and find yourself lacking the motivation you previously had. Mental health problems are equally as important as physical issues. I think your dad, the doctor, and the school counsellors would all be really understanding. I also know that it's really hard not to overthink situations, but it's best if we try not. Usually we overthink the worst possible scenarios which isn't helpful.

It's also wonderful to see that you have some great insight about your behaviour and even recognising how sometimes you make friends with some specific intentions. That actually shows you're quite in tune with your emotions. Just from your post I can also tell you are more than just a high-achieving student - you seem like an emotionally intelligent and lovely person. I'm sure if you asked your family and friends they would give you a list of wonderful words to describe you!

Please feel free to give an update whenever you feel up to it.

Wishing you the very best ~

[teatime_alltime]

Hi SarahZ,

Thanks for your reply! I'm feeling a lot better after reading it.

Just an update - I went back to school today and explained to my teacher about what happened. She was super understanding and let me do my presentation, so that's a big relief! I'm still shaken from yesterday though; I don't want to go through that again. I also talked to some close friends yesterday and they helped me calm down.

I think I should talk to a professional soon though about my issues. I've reached out before for help but I always feel so vulnerable when I do that.

I think, for now, I'll let myself calm down after this and try to take it easy for a while.

Thank you for helping me out 😄

[Emmen]

Hello teatime_alltime,

I love that name. I wish it were teatime, all the time!

On a more serious note, I'm glad your teacher was understanding. I just want you to remember that mental health issues should be taken as seriously as a physical illness. So if you feel you need to see a GP, don't hesitate or worry about what he or she may say.

If you need to speak to someone and get advice about seeing a GP, feel free to reach out in this forum or give the Beyond Blue helpline a call.

Cheers,
M

[SarahZ]

Hey teatime_alltime,

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond. I'm really happy to hear that your teacher was super understanding about your situation and allowed you to do the presentation. That's great news! You should feel super proud of yourself in taking the courage and initiative to approach you teacher to the explain what you were going through. It's also terrific to hear that you are thinking of seeking some professional support. I definitely understand the struggles of feeling vulnerable. I think it's completely natural to feel discomfort at the thought of being so raw and honest with your emotions. However, I do think moments of vulnerability can really allow us to delve into our inner thoughts which can then, in turn, generate some healthy conversations and really enhance our mental state.

Please feel free to reach out again whenever you need to!

All the best ~