I used to have problems when I was 12 till 14-ish. I moved schools for year 7, and I didn't know how to make friends with people and open up because I went from a small school to this massive school, and there where 3 classes of my year group. In year 7 I began to crumble, not being used to bullying and put downs and the pressure of other students. In year 8 everything got worse, I had two friends but I felt completely alone, unloved, neglected bot hat home and at school.
I used to sit in a tree and cry, and I would literally speak to the moon. It got better at the end of year 9, and I didn't feel as bad about everything.
But now, it's come back, it's worse and I don't know what to do anymore. My parents have just split, I eft my mum and two younger brothers to move into my dad's, and he has a girlfriend.
They go out a lot and I spend a lot of time at the house by myself, sometimes they both work night shift and I'm home all night by myself and go to school by bike. I go to my mums twice a week too see her and my brothers, but mainly my dogs because I miss them so frickin much.
I'm 16 now, have only a few friends. None of them ever message me, I go out to the cinemas alone with my teddy, spend time at the shops with my headphones in and going nothing much but drinking boost juice or something. I spend just about no time with any of my small amount of friends outside of school, inside school my last close friend doesn't even sit with me anymore, ever, she hardly even talks to me now. My closest friend moved school, and my other close friend hardly talks to me either.
I can't stand my other peers, and I feel so empty, so damned alone all the time, I watch anime and listen to music heaps and draw to de stress but I have all this work, a broken family, no friends, I don't have my dogs and basically all of my time is spent alone. I don't want to leave the house, I only enjoy basketball, I get into fights with other students and have just about no motivation to do anything.
I feel completely alone, isolated from everything. I am emotionally craving but I cannot seek out my own desires, I cannot stand my fellow classmates because they're all so immature and I intimidate them apparently. I'm not sleeping properly and have a lot of trouble finishing my work, or getting good marks, I don't even have my dogs with me. I feel like I am truly drowning now. I have no one to speak too, and I can hardly stand this anymore but I don't know what to do.
