I don't know why I feel like this..

[Smc12]

Only recently has the feeling of helplessness taken over me. It's been happening for the past year or so, but has recently increased quite a bit. The worst part is I can't put it in words properly. I feel lost. I feel alone. I feel helpless. I have become so cold and have begun pushing my loved ones away, yet at the same time hope that someone comes along that is right for me and will magically 'cure' this feeling i've been having. I fins myself wanting to cry at random times for no real reason. I take every little comment so personally, even when it's not. I snap at my loved ones. I reject nice, new people from my life in fear that I'll somehow destroy them and tell myself I don't deserve good people in my life. I hate my body image and worry that I may also develop an eating disorder. I get sad for no reason and eat my feelings when no one is looking to know what I'm doing. I'm scared I'll never feel better or even start getting worse. I have some great friends but they seem to not have as much time for me these days, or are too busy spending time with their new partners. My emotions are just all over the place and I don't know how to cope with it all as it's becomming too much.

[AGrace]

Hi Smc,

Thank you for reaching out to us here at the forums. Please know that we are all here to listen, support you, and try our best to offer some suggestions. You've taken a very brave step by coming here, and sharing your worries.

I noticed you have posted in "Young People", do you mind me asking how old you are? I always suggest to young people that the best course of action when you are feeling overwhelmed is to speak with a trusted adult. This doesn't have to be someone close to you, it could be a GP, or a student counsellor. It is important that you speak with someone though. If you want to see a GP there are a list of GP's who specialise in mental health available on Beyondblue's website. Once you have made the appointment all you need to do is share with the Dr exactly what you've said in your post here. You don't need to know the why's, or how's. The Dr will be able to help guide you in the right direction.

I know you're scared about not feeling better, but trust me, you will, so hang in there.

It's often the case that our friends can become distracted with other things in their lives, have you tried talking with any of your friends about feeling a little neglected?

Although you don't like the way you look at the moment, it's important for you to make sure you are eating a really good diet, you will need energy to be able to fight the way you are feeling.

You might also want to take a look at a couple of the threads written by broken beyond repair. "broken beyond repair" and "guys I hit a milestone" under the young people heading in the forums. If you chat with broken beyond repair she will probably be able to really relate to how you are feeling. The good thing about the forums is that there are others who know what you're going through.

I hope to hear back from you.

AGrace