How to get others to support you?

[ALL]

Hey people,

I have anxiety disorder and I really need some help. my mum just found out and while I have given her resources and talked to her she pushes me away and wont meet me half way it research to overcome it. she doesn't understand how serious it is even if I tell her. my dad is the same .its starting to make it worse.  how do I get them to help me?

[NicoleP]

Hi ALL

i have just arrived home after a two day conference in Melbourne. 

It sounds as though it is going to take a lot of effort to get you mum to be supportive. This saying comes to mind

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,The courage to change the things I can,And the wisdom to know the difference.

Funny thing, one of the things that came up at the conference was positive thought. I was with 140 psychologists. The were told to list positive qualities about the self and every one of them admitted that when they stated a positive about the self their little voice disputed it with a negative. If the thought they were a good friend, the little voice would answer but what about the time when..

Try to focus on yourself and not to let your mum add to your anxiety

KezzaA

[ALL]

Hey Kezza

that conference would have been so interesting! I hope you had a good time there. I went to my own 'youth mental health forum' a week ago and it really helped me!

I know that saying. it comes up in school every few weeks in a prayer. and it totally fits. thankyou for that. my action plan is so far to try and help her a bit more, but to also focus on myself and if she dosnt understand im going to have to work harder on my own. the little changes so far are great though. I guess the thing I regret now is telling her in the first place. when I was younger, because of dad working away from home, she was always the responsible parent and only now as I have gotten older am I connecting with her more. after I told her though, it went a bit rigid, as did it with the rest of my family. I think that's the hardrest thing to take- that it might not return the way I want it to. I love my whole family, and I hate typing this sort of thing ( typing things like this makes me scared something bad will happen even though I know it wont - anxiety I know but im freaking but I need to tell someone I hope nothing happens logic tells me it wont AHHh) because they do try and they are wonderful to me.

im just glad that I have people like you who actually understand.

I hope you are going okay. your amazing!

ALL

[NicoleP]

Hi ALL

I am really pleased to hear that you went to the conference - what a great effort. You actually sound like you are working well towards your goals and have lots of things in place. Good on you!

It sounds like you love your mum a lot and she loves you too. I can understand why her reaction affects you but a reaction does not necessarily reflect how she feels inside. Relationships do grow and change and in any worthwhile relationship there are going to be times when we feel hurt/sad. Difficult times come in all relationships. The alternative is not to have relationships at all, not to love or care for anyone. As I think I have said before, your mum is probably coming to terms with what is happening. I don't know whether I told you, but my daughter went through a really bad time. when I found out what she had been doing to herself, I freaked out and blamed myself.

Anyhow, thanks for your kind words. You may not realise how helpful your words are.  I am doing fine. Back to work today after 7 weeks off.

Kezza