How to get others to support you?

[ALL]

Hey people,

I have anxiety disorder and I really need some help. my mum just found out and while I have given her resources and talked to her she pushes me away and wont meet me half way it research to overcome it. she doesn't understand how serious it is even if I tell her. my dad is the same .its starting to make it worse.  how do I get them to help me?

[NicoleP]

Hi ALL

Welcome to the forums. I think that you bring up a really interesting discussion point and one that I wish I had the answer to. It seems to me that your parents are in denial. It is a tough thing for them to get their head around and there may be some self blame (we parents are good at that). if you don't suffer from these conditions I think that people, including your parents, just don't get it. The problem is, you can't make them understand - you can do what you have done (which was very courageous) and give them the information. I would also suggest that you talk to the trained counsellors either by phone or online at BB to get some expert advice.

Second, the important thing is getting you some help. I am not sure how old you are, but are you able to go to a GP for a referral to some kind of counsellor or psychologist? Your GP can develop a mental health plan. This gives you 10subsidised sessions with a social worker/psychologist. 

In the meantime, keep posting on the forums. People here understand and care cos we experience similar issues. Take care.

Kezza

[ALL]

Thanks for the reply Kezza!

I am 16. My mum has taken me to the GP and I am seeing a psychologist. I am half way through my plan. she met with the psychologist, was told everything and I even explained to her its no ones fault. yet she still doesn't do much for me. she is trying a bit, but only if I push her and still she gets angry and annoyed. I have mild depression also, which even though she was told me a professional, she denied to my doctor in front of me and my sister ( who didn't know).im scared she will push me away completely.

thankyou for understanding and caring. I was really worried about posting on here. I didn't want to hurt anyone else. I hope you are alright 🙂

ALL

[NicoleP]

Hi ALL

It was great to hear back from you so soon. Please don't worry about posting here. We are kindred spirits and we are all here for the same reason. People here understand cos we experience it ourselves. You can discuss anything without fear of judgement .

You might also find the young peoples thread interesting. Have a read and post if you feel comfortable. Often by reading, you can see that you are not alone. 

I am really pleased that you have started treatment. I have found that time between appointments can be a problem which is why this is such a great site. 

As I said in my first post, I wish I had the answer as to how to get others to support you. Your mum seems like she is at least supporting to some degree cos she has taken you to the doctor and psych. It seems as though she feels that by getting the professionals to deal with it, that she has done what she can but you are needing more from her which is understandable. 

Any ideas anyone else?

Kezza

[white knight]

Hi ALL, a warm welcome here also. Glad you posted.

Kezza asked "Any ideas anyone else?"   No not really. You covered the topic so well.

ALL, there is that saying "you can lead a horse to water but you cant make him drink" It is so appropriate here.  Once we inform some loved ones about our condition we often get what appears to be a cold shoulder about it. They might think you are being a drama queen, or exaggerating. And in that position you are so disappointed you feel like you are begging for the concern you should get in the first place.

Dont despair, as Kezza said, we are here to listen and I'm so glad you posted. There are many young teens reading this now that you have helped by realising they are not alone.

Tony WK

[ALL]

Thanks WK,

I keep feeling like I should do more to help her understand. do you think I have done enough?

thanks for the support. i am glad i can help others ( *queue emotion*) because it has really been hard for me. thanks anyway, hopefully someone will have an answer.

ALL

[white knight]

Hi ALL,

Give your mum time. Seek literature about it. Print it out and give it to her or leave it on a coffee table.

Sometime people need time to get a grip on the topic.

cheers

[NicoleP]

How are you going ALL?

[ALL]

Im stuggling a bit to be honest ( doesn't help I have a test tomorrow). thankyou for asking Kezza. I saw my psychologist today and talked about it with her. it looks like unfourtnately my mum will never understand and im going to have to fight this battle without her. I woke up this morning and the first thing she said to me was 'its not like you are sick and need treatment'. I don't think she gets that G.A.D is a mental illness nor what a mental illness is. I think for my own sake I need to focus my energies on recovery. but im still open to suggestions. im glad that I have support networks like you to help me. you get me through. thankyou

I hope you are going okay also. I hear its been tough for you. stay strong

ALL

[ALL]

oh, and although she isn't fully trying, there are little improvements. she gets angry or stops talking often, but tonight for my exam she said if I tried to be positive, she would go by me green highlighters ( I need them for study- ONLY GREEN) at 8:30 at night. its the little things that help get you thrugh sometimes