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can i have depression for no reason?

kb123
Community Member

Hi,

so i took a test on whether or not i have depression and anxiety. it says i've got both, but im not actually sure if i can have depression because i dont actually have anything that could have triggered my depression or anything. i get somewhat good grades, both my parents are together, i have friends. but then i just get those random days where i want to be alone and cry or i just dont feel like talking to anyone. And i start to think that my friends dont like me and they are sick of me and that no one wants to be my friend or hang out with me. I think i'm just one of those people that like to be told that i'm pretty or needs consent reassurance or whatever. its like i pull myself away from everyone and im lost in my head, where im just not myself and feel low? I sometimes have trouble breathing in class and my hands start to shake a little, and i feel completely anxious and like i'm a failure.

Once i completely just sobbed one night before dinner, i couldn't breath and i felt dizzy and ran to the bathroom and sat on the floor and cried. I feel too scared to talk to anyone because i seem completely happy on the outside and i feel like if i tell anyone what i'm feeling they'll think i just want attention. I don't know if this means anything either but i always feel the need to gulp and i searched it up and it said because of anxiety and stress is this true?

thanks, i know this is pretty random

1 Reply 1

therising
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi kb123

Sometimes it can definitely be hard to pick just how we come to feel low. For some folk, I believe it's a lot of little subtle stuff that gradually happens over time. It's enlightening to ask people how many conditions have been given to them throughout their life. Once they start their list, they can be rather surprised. For some the list can look like this:

  • I was always told what I had to wear from when I was pretty young. I never really had a lot of choice when it came to expressing my individuality/unique nature
  • My parents always told me how much they cared about me, except for all the times I heard them say 'I don't care, you'll do as you're told!' I never felt like I was truly heard or respected
  • I was mum or dad's favourite child until I became 'difficult', then they sort of dropped me like a hot potato in favour of my brother or sister who was considered 'the good child'
  • I was never allowed to challenge my parents. Even my teachers at school led me to feel ripped off with unfair rules and I wasn't allowed to challenge them either, to raise them to greater consciousness

The list goes on.

I believe, we start off in life 'fully charged' as our natural self until people can begin to drain us with conditions. This draining aspect is not necessarily their fault, it can be a fault passed down through the generations. It can be a fault that is considered normal and not a fault or issue at all. So, whilst our parents or teachers can be raising us in some ways, in other ways they can be lowering us. We don't necessarily recognise the lowering or draining (of our natural self) until we hit a noticeable low. All is not lost...

What charges us up relates to reclaiming our natural self. For example, if something doesn't quite sit right in the way of justice, respect or understanding, we can challenge it. You know how 3 year olds love to ask 'Why?' all the time until they're told to stop it. Generally, whatever brings the kid in us to life (within reason) is what leads us back to that high we began life with.

With the gasping aspect, do you notice what you do before you gasp? We're basically energetic creatures taking in energy or letting it out (if our body deems it necessary). If your body is wanting to gasp air in, do you yawn, sigh, cough or cry or such before the gasp? If not, maybe your body's simply trying to naturally raise your energy levels. I find stretching or yawning out unwanted energy helps raise levels. Gets my feet buzzing too 🙂