Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Is it normal to imagine people watching you?

replies: 1

I keep imagining that people I'm attracted to or have respect for are always watching me. I know 100% that they aren't there but I can't help but imagine it, and the thing is I hate it. This has been going on for months, and I haven't been able to feel like myself at home or at school anymore because of it. If it's someone I'm attracted to, then I feel like I have to act like someone better than me and has no flaws for that someone to like me. If I don't, I feel embarrassed and upset with myself. If it's someone I have respect for (like an authority) I feel like I have to act intelligent, know what I'm doing, etc. I can even imagine people that I haven't seen in years watching me. This gives me the urge to look at mirrors, cabinets, windows, doors, any place that could have someone looking through, or open space. Anything I'm doing, that someone or people are watching me and judging me, even walking around the house. I hate doing this because I feel like I'm going crazy and this is some abnormal problem that I've created in my head. I just don't think this is normal, I've read that this could be a self-image problem but IDK. Does anyone have a clue on what I'm doing or what this could be?

I'm confused to what I'm feeling

replies: 2

Hi I'm a teenager and I've always been the really happy, hopeful and helpful girl but I've been changing. I've started getting these mood swings and getting really anxious sometimes and sad other times. I've had two mild anxiety attacks. I feel like I can't talk to anyone about it and I know I should but I don't. I feel like I can't let anyone down. I do have a really supportive friend group and family but i keep up a mask. I pretend that im fine and happy and they believe it. I just wish someone would notice, but I don't want things to change and people to fuss over me. I get insecure about everything and am super shy/have an irrational fear of talking to anyone I don't know well. When my feelings go haywire it feels like the world is collapsing but I keep telling myself this is just part of being a teenager. Does it stop? I feel like I can't talk to anyone, I'm avoiding talking to my friends and it doesn't help that I like to be alone and am very introverted. I'm just really stuck. Please help

My life is going nowhere

replies: 3

Made an account purely because I need to be heard. I’m 23 years old and work a minimum wage job I hate because it was the only place out of 100 odd jobs I’d applied for that even bothered to give me an interview, I have a bachelors degree in a useless field that has gotten me nowhere that I only enrolled in because of my low ATAR and prompting from parents, I don’t have any family or friends (ones I do have I’m no longer on speaking terms with), all in all I’m miserable all the time. I just want to drop everything and simply aimlessly wander the country, I can’t take another year of this drudgery. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life as the complete failure I am now and while I acknowledge it won’t last forever I don’t see any light of hope at the end of this dark tunnel that is my current experience. I want to go back to school and earn a degree in a field that will actually provide me with decent work, but I’ve been so badly burned by my previous degree that I’m too afraid to go further into debt and waste my time on another three years of useless “education”. All I want is just a bit of hope. That’s all. I hate myself so much. Why should my life be this frustrating? I don’t have any happiness

Break up during isolation!

replies: 2

Hey there, I am 18 and dealing with a confusing break up type situation. I already have mental health issues and dont know how im going to cope through a break up during isolation and not being able to hang out with my friends. Please does anyone hav... View more

not sure what to do

replies: 1

Hey, Something has been on my mind for a while now and I'm not sure how to approach it. See when I may be struggling with something and I want to get things off my chest, I never do. I feel like I'm just going to burden my friends with my unnecessary troubles. Most of the things I'm dealing with, I know doesn't really need a second/outside opinion or advice of any sort. The things I'm struggling with I know how to solve them, I just don't. So if I were to tell my friends my problems, nothing can really be done on their part. I don't want to make them feel bad for not being able to provide any sort of input. Plus, my closest friend that I used to tell a lot of things to is currently going through some struggles herself. She's the type of person that a lot of people go to when they need advice. She has also has mentioned this to me recently that a lot of people have confined in her with their struggles. She's trustworthy, reliable, non-judgmental and understanding and I think that's why a lot of people feel comfortable around her. That's why I haven't really opened up to her recently. I don't want to burden and stress her out anymore than she already is. This is really silly, I want to open up, because there are things on my chest that I want to let out because it's frustrating me, yet I know it wouldn't do anything...? And then I guess I could open up to other people, but again, I feel like it would just burden them. I've always wondered if someone would be happy for a friend to open up to them in the sense that their friend trusts them enough and relies on them like a friend would do. Or would it really just burden them and stress them out, and hence affecting their own mental health. I don't know the answer and I don't know what to do.

I am unbelievably stressed right now

replies: 2

My grandmother was accepted into a trial for cancer treatment a week ago. Now she's been rejected because her cancer grew too fast. My dad is going over to her country to try and buy some ridiculously expensive medicine to save her, IN THE MIDST OF A CORONAVIRUS CRISIS, and is going to stay there for weeks. Oh, and she has 2 weeks left in her at the minimum. Meanwhile, my mum and I have found that our puppy has just broken his toe, and needs around-the-clock care for 2 weeks, WHILE I HAVE ALL OF MY EXAMS ON. I have to stay home from school to take care of him - and may miss out on my science exam and have to do it from home - and he needs to be crate-trained for these two weeks as well. And he needs medication, and can't be walked because of his toe, so he will probably go insane and cause immense trouble. I don't want my grades to drop because of missing school - or because of all of this stress. Oh, and I'm a hypochondriac, so coronavirus is making me terrified. And if one of us (me or my mother) contracts it, who knows what the hell we're going to do. And my other set of grandparents have some kind of weird bug as well - not coronavirus, I don't think, anyway - and I won't be able to stay with them because I'm a kid, I can spread it, etc. I can't afford to miss school, I don't want my grandmother to die, I DON'T HAVE TIME TO LOOK AFTER MY DOG! I'm incredibly stressed. Sorry for the convoluted paragraph, I don't have much time because I have to study and pick up my pup from the vet.

Young and hurting

replies: 1

Hi I’m a complete newbie to any forum and especially about mental health. But I thought at this tough time I needed to speak out and not hold it in. So here it goes. I'm 21 and still living at home with my parents while studying sport management. I still have a part time retail job and making a good income. I recently purchased my first new used car with help from dad but I’m paying him back in good terms. Another addition in my life is my new puppy Ziggy (mini dachshund)-10 weeks. Which is keeping me company in isolation. So life on the surface seems great with everything but when you scratch the surface I’m not healthy as I need to be. Firstly, my health overall is good but my fitness level is below average. Partly due to not playing footy atm. I’m not on any medications or anything but I am wanting to improve my health and gain advantages out of my healthy body. But I can’t. My mental health is stopping me. Every time before iso I had gym phobia. I would hate going and get really down on myself. My diet would go into a bad patch for the week , eating junk food etc. Just before iso I improved it with gradually going to the gym but could never keep a good routine. im a really outgoing person. I love seeing friends and family and I love my face to face interactions at work but I feel like something is holding me back. Then my anxious mind overpowers my body. I believe one reasons is my constant struggle with my parents and still living at home. I love my family and parents with all my heart but with constant bickering, them questioning about everything and lack of independence my mind can’t handle it. I feel trapped and when I speak out about anything they just don’t listen at all so I hold the most important stuff in. FYI this has been going on for years not just being in Isolation. l feel I need independence from them and I’m wanting to move out but with a low income I just can’t financially do that atm and waiting to uni to finish and intern while iso lifts. I feel like I’m worrying more about the differences between them and I then improving myself. I just don’t know how to deal with it atm. I don’t want to exclude them from my life but i believe I need independence. if anyone out can give me some tips and help I would appreciate greatly. I wanting to improve my wellbeing. thanks, Harry p.s. I hate the term “your young, just live your life” because I do live my life comfortably but there’s a difference between living and improving.

I'm trapped in a fantasy.

replies: 5

Hi, I'm a bit unfamiliar with online support but I'll try my best to communicate. For the past couple of months I've been having trouble staying in the real world. It's like I'm there but my mind is somewhere so far away. I go to work and school and try to balance my social life but things are getting a little bit more difficult to concentrate on them as the days pass by. I daydream a lot and often find myself sucked in for several minutes to hours even. It used to be a little thing that would distract me from the struggles I would face in my life but it soon became something I didn't want to let go. I distract myself a lot by writing stories, music and sleeping. When I'm alone with no distractions, I daydream. I've tried sitting down and actually listening to myself but all that brings is sadness and loneliness. Daydreaming and distracting myself are the only things keeping me going but I've become so dependent on them that I've started to neglect my actual life. It's like escaping to a different world where everything is all that I've ever wanted it to be. My current daydream has lasted four months. I have friends, family and even someone I love in that place. They all have personalities, lives and stories to tell. I know they're all fabricated and fake but they seem so real when I'm there. In four months, I was able to create an intricate world with things I love. The dream me there faces struggles and problems but at least she has friends, family and people who care that always help through them. I'm addicted to what I've created and I can't seem to let go of all those people I've met in that place. I genuinely love them all. I used to be in a really dark place a year or so back and I didn't have anyone to support me. I found myself a job and it helped me distract myself from everything I was going through. I had tried talking to my parents about what I was struggling with but they brushed it off and blamed it on my laziness. They said it was the video games, the phone and the internet that caused me to be like that. In truth, I was using those as crutches so I wouldn't have to think about my life but I also heard some truth from what they said. So I stopped gaming, got a job and slept all the time. It worked for a while but I was so detached from myself that I don't even know who I am. I guess that's why I'm still like this. I would appreciate any advice. I hope it wasn't too lengthy, thank you so much for your time.

I don't know how to make friends

replies: 4

Hey, I haven't posted on here in a long while... I've been feeling lonely and depressed about not having any close friends. Growing up I always had a best friend/small group of close friends who I could share everything with and spend all my time with, without ever getting bored. Now I find it hard to hang out with anyone because I'm so used to my own company. I worry that I'll be boring, I won't know what to say, they won't enjoy my company and so I just end up staying on my own. The fact that my past friendships have failed also makes me not want to make new friends because what's the point? My last good friend and I had booked to go away on holiday and about a month before we were due to fly out she told me (completely out of the blue) that she didn't want me to come and she didn't want to be my friend anymore. Nothing bad had happened and we never fought or didn't get along - I still don't understand what happened, I was so hurt. She has been away on the holiday and I was left with $600 out of pocket for the non-refundable flight, just because she didn't want me to go with her. I think it was really unfair and mean. I don't like having angry or negative thoughts about other people and I had to deal with that for a while because I was so hurt I couldn't help it. So here I am now. I only work part time and I'm not at Uni at the moment so I don't know how else to make friends. Starting a new job and studying are the only things I can think of for meeting new people. I also feel like a lot of people already have tight friendship groups that have developed overtime and that there's no room for a new person to join. I'm okay with being on my own because I'm used to it now but I know that socialising will improve my depression and overall quality of life. I miss some old friends I used to have however in the past when I've tried to reach out nothing has ever really come of it. They don't want to hang out with me leaving me thinking I must be the problem. Does anyone have any ideas on how to meet and make strong friendships? dragonfly

Advice

replies: 1

Hi, Honestly I think I've been feeling down for at least a few years now but it got really bad at the beginning of the year. To the point where I distanced myself from a lot of people that I love. I thought it was just going to be a brief thing but I've gotten to the stage where I can't bring myself to message back. I don't like looking at stories on snapchat and instagram, I've just shut down and to be honest its made me feel worse. I speak to at least three of my friends properly but I can't help but hate myself for treating my other friends that way. Hating myself is the reason I'm in this position in the first place so I feel like I'm in a big vicious circle. I really want to know how I can make those steps to open back up? I've been thinking of messaging people but I guess I'm lacking the drive and motivation to do it. One person at a time? Day by day? Any advice would mean the world, thanks.

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

Is it normal to imagine people watching you? replies: 1

I'm confused to what I'm feeling replies: 2

My life is going nowhere replies: 3

Break up during isolation! replies: 2

not sure what to do replies: 1

I am unbelievably stressed right now replies: 2

Young and hurting replies: 1

I'm trapped in a fantasy. replies: 5

I don't know how to make friends replies: 4

Advice replies: 1