Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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No One Understands

replies: 1

Hi I am a 16 year old girl and I have been experiencing mental health for at least 6 years. From a young age I was always the big child and that always make my Dad pick on me telling me I should stoping eating so much, or that I should be embarrassed about my weight, this went on for 2 years and really affecting how I looked at myself, I developed anorexia for the first year, my mother found out and thought that I could just stop, she doesn’t understand how difficult it is, my anorexia turned into bulimia for the next 5 years. Whilst this I found myself crying every night, I always end up hurting myself, I don’t know why? I have always felt like I make things more difficult for my parents, with food, and even grades, I’m not the smartest kid and they always expect me to get high marks, to achieve this I studied 24/7 to reach those high expectations but whilst doing this I developed serious anxiety and a bad habit of stressing, I want to tell them but they are old folk who believe that I’m making it up and it will just go away. My uncle passed away from depression while my dad was young, my dad felt like he was making it up. what do I do?

Advice on relationship-y stuff and self-image

replies: 42

Hi folks! Hope you're all doing ok. So, I'll try to keep this relatively short (though in doing so I will leave out a bunch of the story). About a year ago, I got friendly with this girl and developed feelings for her. I was going to ask her out, but wanted to know what my friends thought of her before I asked. Basically, no more than a week after I introduced her to my best friend he asked her out (I hadn't told him I was going to, etc.). This hurt a bunch but I kept it to myself for a long time, and I progressively got worse emotionally. Eventually I told them, which didn't really help me at all - in fact this made it worse. They were nice about it, and supportive, etc. (they were my two best friends at this stage). Eventually, they stopped dating and she started dating another guy (who is now also one of my good friends). I now don't know if I like her or not, I'm really confused - I guess I'll figure it out eventually - but I'm not over it by any means (though a lot better than I was). I don't want to blame this completely, but I think it heavily influenced my poor/relatively unhealthy self-image. She is the only girl I have been this close to so I guess a part of me perceives her as a 'representation' of the female sex (which I know is not logical and is wrong in a number of ways). But anyways, I've never seen myself as anything close to society's standards of good looking, my friends are objectively much more attractive than I by these standards. This wasn't a problem before but is now. Basically, it feels like I'm just feeling sorry for myself for not getting the girl, and I'm kinda convinced that I have no chance in the 'relationships' area due to the self-image issues (with the above story as 'evidence' of how incompetent I am in this regard). Its a lot more complex then this, but anyway... any advice you could give would be greatly appreciated, or if you want me to clarify anything or give more details I am happy to do so. I'll also say, recently I haven't been feeling too down, but thought it would be a good idea to talk about it. Thanks

Feeling alone

replies: 2

This is my first time opening up so it's a little bit hard for me. To start off with im 20 years old turning 21 in a couple of weeks. Pretty much i have noticed every year around my birthday i feel really down. Today has been extremely hard for me, im feeling very alone and that i dont fit in. I get the feeling when im around people that they hate me and dont want to be around me. I feel like people are judging me when i walk out of my house. I keep having thoughts that everything would be easier if i didn't exist. Generally just dont have any motivation either. I feel as if im falling behind on my "time line" like i should have graduated from uni this year and have my career sorted - I'm currently a manager at a fast food restaurant and its given me a lot of anxiety because of abusive customers. I just want to enjoy living again and not have these feelings all the time because of this voice in my head

I'm in a bad place and needed to write it down......

replies: 5

So I'm a 16 year old kid whose been going through some stuff. But, nothing particularly bad has happened to me. I started getting overwhelmed and start crying when I'd pack my lunch for school, for no reason, 6 months ago. I thought it was strange, but didn't really address it. After a while of feeling, empty and void of any motivation for basic tasks. I reached out to a friend. He took me to go see the GP and, she said I had major depressive disorder. The diagnoses made sense but, I don't know where it came from. I've always been somewhat pessimistic about the world in general, but that was always just me. Everything was going perfectly in my life, I finally had made plenty of friends, after being teased and excluded for 2 years, my grades where perfect, my life was perfect. And yet, I'm miserable, I feel nothing. I started sleeping in everyday for school and being self destructive. My grades have dropped to the point where I'm not even passing, my rooms a mess, and I just feel, nothing. I just want to feel something again. I can't look to the future with excitement for whats to come, everyday is just another day, they've all moulded into each other and it feels like it wont end. But everyone says theres a light at the end of the tunnel, and I believe them, I just don't see any light yet. Part of me thinks it's because I got everything I ever wanted, the things I thought would make me happy, only to realise happiness is a fleeting moment, I'll always be running on my hedonic treadmill. Waiting for the next thing that'll fill the void. But I think I just stopped running, and I don't know if I ever can again. I don't know if writing here will help me, and I wasn't able to capture how I truly feel in so few words. But I'm drowning. And this, this is me gasping for air. If anyone is reading this, thank-you, and sorry it was so dark, but unfortunately it gets dark without the mask I put on. Yes I know the mask is ironic considering I'm posting this anonymously but still, uno what I mean. Have a nice day, I really mean it.

Scared of getting a job away from home.

replies: 1

I'm turning 21 soon and currently in my 2nd year of University living 4 hours away from my hometown. Previously, I've been perfectly fine with being away from home/family so much and have dealt well with any feelings of homesickness. Even during COVID, i have been away from home for months at a time and have dealt with that well. However, whenever i consider getting a casual job where i live now i freak out and become super anxious. I don't know what mental block or what is going on in my brain but i was offered a casual job recently and ended up turning it down because i was so beside myself and hysterically crying. I just feel this really intrusive/unbearable feeling of being trapped and isolated if i get a job where i am even though i know that i can always request days/weekends off to visit my hometown. I know part of reason i feel this way is probably because of the current pandemic/isolation situation (i have definitely been a bit homesick the past few weeks) but i still feel like a little bit of a failure because i am nearly 21 and should able to take these steps (getting a new job away from home). This situation has kinda left me feeling a little doubtful of my ability to start my career in the future if i panic about the prospect of getting a small casual job now. Would love to hear if anyone has experienced anything similar?

something that happened to me and i don't know what to do.

replies: 3

Lunch today will be one I will never forget. I had to do an interview with my friends about school life. It was supposed to be happy and fun but then the year 10's came. They are stereotypically the mean people of high school. This was today proven to be true. We sat in their "spot" unaware this was their territory and no one else's. So I and my few friends sat and started to begin and then they came. Time moved slower as they came over and I felt a deep dark pit in my heart erupt. I'm the small bookworm who wears my heart on my sleeves and am way too sensitive for the life of me. It felt as if they were almost about to yell at us over sitting. As I'm writing this I'm in class still and on the verge of tears. I'm so unbelievably worried about walking in the hallway and them seeing me and doing... I have no idea. I just know that they talked trash behind our backs. I know I shouldn't care about what other people say about me but I just feel so scared, helpless and sad. How can I feel better? Is there something I can say to myself to make it all disappear? I knew I should have never gone to school today.

Coronavirus and the Impact On Children and Younger People

replies: 0

Hi Everyone, I hope that your are going along okay but clearly these are difficult times for younger people, especially in Victoria. How are you coping during the pandemic? What are the main challenges you are facing?What helps you feel better about ... View more

Not viewing life as something worth living.

replies: 2

As the title states, I struggle with the fact that I do not view life worth living. However, this is not from a mental illness, but rather stems from my philosophical views. I believe that life is meaningless and ultimately, that it is a negative experience. I have read multiple philosophical texts looking for answers, but almost always I find the answers supplied by those texts to be unsatisfactory. That is to say, the answers given do not seem logically sound, or reasonable enough to me (such as Camus' Absurdism, or Sartre's personalised existentialism.) It also does not help when reading works of pessimistic philosophers, such as Schopenhauer or Cioran, I find myself agreeing with their viewpoints that I cannot refrain myself from finding realistic. Furthermore, the result of having such views lead to quite a lonely, unsuccessful life. Unsuccessful in such a way that I procrastinate and waste opportunities (for example, I have several outstanding assignments that I have yet to complete and may not ever complete.) To further expand on my previous mention of loneliness, whenever I find myself expressing my nihilistic views, I am more often than not met with impertinence and disdain. It is almost like others see my philosophy as a threat to their way of life, and push me away (this is evident through the fact that my friendships have suffered greatly from the expression of my views.) Consequently, I also have developed a more negative view of my parents, for the reason being that they thoughtlessly brought me into this meaningless existence (an existence that I would rather not have to endure.) However, my main problem originates in the fact that I cannot rationalise to continue living. That is to say, due to my nihilistic views on life, it occurs to me that it is illogical for myself to continue living. Almost hypocritical, in fact.

High school dropout, don't know where to go from here

replies: 16

I'm 17, turning 18 in a few months. I left school at the start of this year. Since I was 13 I've dealt with depression and anxiety, and it became this recurring cycle year after year. I moved schools at the end of 2018 hoping it would help. After one year at this new school, I realised I was at my wit's end. I made no new friends at this new school, I ended up skipping classes and going home early because I couldn't handle being in the classroom, and I ended up failing the school year. I had to leave because I didn't see the school situation getting any better. At that point, after years of anxiety attacks and depressive episodes, I was so burnt out and exhausted. At the start of this year when I decided not to return to school, I had a chat with the career counsellors at school. They told me what my options were and they gave me places to research and look into. I started seeing a psychologist regularly again, and the plan was to get me ready to go to TAFE in July. But my heart was never in it. I kept putting off contacting the TAFE institutes I was recommended, and I had no idea what kind of course I wanted to do, and where I wanted to go after doing TAFE. So I told my psychologist how I felt, and she told me it was okay, that I didn't need to jump into anything too quickly, etc. But it's really hard for me to just accept that my life is "on hold". I used to have a plan, I wanted to get good grades, take a gap year and go to uni to study media and communications. My plans have changed a lot and I'm not even sure what I want to do anymore, if I even want to go to uni. But I hate not doing anything. My life feels meaningless and everyday is the same. Everyone keeps asking me what I'm doing and what I'm going to do and I just don't know. My dad wants me to go back to doing VCE. My family has always believed in me, always expected big things from me and now it's like I've let them down and they don't expect anything from me anymore. I know it's not too late, I believe it's never too late to turn your life around. I'm only 17 for crying out loud, my life has barely started. I would really love some advice or to hear other people's stories of being a dropout and what they ended up doing.

Advice on what to do

replies: 1

I'll make it a brief as possible as I'm not really one who tends to open up but it's killing me inside When I was 18 though to 20 I lost my best friend and other friends from suicide or an accident, that messed me up for years now, I felt like I was getting better but I pushed alot of people away because of it, now just recently I spent 7 and a half months bed ridden, unable to look after myself and do anything for myself for the longest time which has made me fall into a deeper hole I thought couldn't get deeper, I was alone and in pain constantly, I pushed my friends and family away cause no one showed they actually cared towards me. Now that I've had surgery and in the process still recovering my loss of strength. I've come to the point that I don't know why I keep trying to recover, having no friends anyone and no one around really eats at me, but I really am trying my best to make myself better but it's so hard when you always feel lonely. If there is any advice anyone can offer I'm willing to try, I do wanna improve myself but I just keep feeling worst and worst the more I try it alone

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

No One Understands replies: 1

Advice on relationship-y stuff and self-image replies: 42

Feeling alone replies: 2

I'm in a bad place and needed to write it down...... replies: 5

Scared of getting a job away from home. replies: 1

something that happened to me and i don't know what to do. replies: 3

Coronavirus and the Impact On Children and Younger People replies: 0

Not viewing life as something worth living. replies: 2

High school dropout, don't know where to go from here replies: 16

Advice on what to do replies: 1