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Young people

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romantic_thi3f Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies
  • replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are i... View more

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

Sophie_M NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first
  • replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindfu... View more

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Kiraxl Lost and alone
  • replies: 2

Hello this is my first post here, i usually don’t talk about these things or anything because im really ashamed and embarrassed The house that i live in that i have grown up in is the worst possible scenario housing style you can think of and i can’t... View more

Hello this is my first post here, i usually don’t talk about these things or anything because im really ashamed and embarrassed The house that i live in that i have grown up in is the worst possible scenario housing style you can think of and i can’t escape or move because its to expensive in my city and i dont trust or like anyone enough to move in with anyone else so i feel stuck i dont talk about it with anyone because its just so embarrassing i am so ashamed. The scenario is that the house i live in is disgusting. I live with my siblings and just my mum and they have an aray of mental problems, my mum bipolar, adhd also shes been a single mum, my sister who i fight with a lot shes just in general crazy and has a lot of mental problems and shes always out to get me and i also live with my brother but all he does is game and be a slob. We have 21 cats in a 1 bedroom house, ( they’re all looked after fed etc) because of my mother. She just keeps getting them she thinks that no one else can look after the strays in our area that they just come to us this has been going on for years but right now its at its peak. 21. Try living with 21 cats. The smell. The amount of money it costs. We have a really bad insect infestation that nothing can help unless we get it professionally fixed but where would all the cats go? They all live inside my mum refuses to let them out so i feel so stuck the house is an absolute mess. No one cleans anything, ive cleaned the bathroom and then my sister would come in and mess it up again along with everyone else adding to it. My house is like a trap - house but worse. We also have 5 dogs to add to all this mess. I have no money because every night i need to buy take out as i can’t cook in my house or even store anything due to the infestation I dont know what to do i cry all the time i just want a normal household i see people cry about being poor but they have a functional household !!! My family breaks everytjing every door in the house is smashed due to tantrums and windows are smashed im so sad i feel so exhausted and lonely i never want anyone to know about my lifestyle and i cant fix it myself because they will just mess it up again. I see no end I am really depressed over this and alone I just want to die i feel like im the only one in the world who has to put up with such a disgusting lifestyle sorry if this didnt make any sense it probably didn’t its very rushed but i am just so stuck and clueless

natsukashii Feeling weak and pathetic because you lack confidence
  • replies: 1

Hi! I need some support, so I will keep it brief. I always feel very socially anxious and panicky when I have to talk to others I don't usually talk to without a friend. I was meant to go to a study group tonight but I only go because my friend goes,... View more

Hi! I need some support, so I will keep it brief. I always feel very socially anxious and panicky when I have to talk to others I don't usually talk to without a friend. I was meant to go to a study group tonight but I only go because my friend goes, and she couldn't come. I know it must sound stupid, but I just can't be myself, and confident without someone else, I have really low self-esteem. But I don't know how to get rid of it. I have panic attacks because I just feel like I'm so self-conscious of how I act and how I talk when I'm in group and personal situations. My parents ask me why, and they often say on the lines of "you have to put in the effort to make friends". But I know that if I did go, I just couldn't! I would be almost paralysed with anxiety! It makes me feel so disappointed in myself when my parents say that, because I should be fine! Normal people are fine! It makes me feel pathetic and weak. How do I stop being like this? Any advice would help a lot Thankyouu

AnxiousS sad all the time
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Basically in the last few months my mental health has deteriorated to the worst it's ever been - I'm sad all the time, and when I'm not sad I'm constantly worried about my future and uni and just everything. I'm now at the point where I ... View more

Hi everyone, Basically in the last few months my mental health has deteriorated to the worst it's ever been - I'm sad all the time, and when I'm not sad I'm constantly worried about my future and uni and just everything. I'm now at the point where I can't see a future where I'm happy, and I don't know why I bother getting out of bed in the morning. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, and I definitely think my mental health played a large part in why I could no longer keep the relationship going, but obviously I have lost a big part of my support system in him. I find it really hard to talk about these things, and I have never had much luck with psychologists and I'm not sure I can put myself through it all again to come out with nothing on the other side. I also am not close to my family and can't talk about any of it with them. I honestly just don't know what to do anymore - every single day just sucks and I don't want to do anything anymore except sleep and cry. I'm also currently midway through the uni semester and at the point where I just don't know what to do. I'm really struggling with just not being able to bring myself to do the work, but at the same time, uni is the only thing getting me out of bed at the moment. Any advice would be appreciated

KB234 No study motivation doesnt faze me, and not in a good way
  • replies: 1

Hi! Im currently in my last year of uni and what should be my most stressful yet it feels like im not taking it seriously. For example, I had a report due at midnight that I had a week to do, and the entire day yesterday uninterrupted to complete it,... View more

Hi! Im currently in my last year of uni and what should be my most stressful yet it feels like im not taking it seriously. For example, I had a report due at midnight that I had a week to do, and the entire day yesterday uninterrupted to complete it, and still bare minimum is done. This isnt the first assignment where this has happened. Its like the due dates have turned into suggestions and not deadlines, I feel no particular stress towards the deadline because Ive let myself be okay with handing things late and cop the penalty which is affecting my grades when it shouldn't have to be this way. The hurdle has always been trying to start working/studying but now even after ive started maintaining that concentration for even 10 minutes is a strain and leads to an hours break. Im hoping to push through this week and use the long weekend to rest and reconsolidate, but and advice or tips to get my head moving in the right direction would help so much. Cheers! -KB

John_P where to from here?
  • replies: 14

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE sa... View more

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE saw the breakup coming. What is was left with was me blaming myself, but in reality it is probably nothing i could have done different. ( i tried my best and friends told me not to worry). As i moved states to live with her, my only network was her and her family and friends. I found it very hard to move on as i am a 1 woman man, and i just couldnt move back home as it meant closure. In the last 2 years i have had to fend for myself, i have become a womaniser-sleeping with a lot of woman and dating many women (where before-i was the sweet loyal fun loving boyfriend type) i have moved a couple of jobs, find it extremely hard to let people in as a friendship. I have developed an unhealthy habbit of looking up erotic material on the internet dailt. Over the past 8 months i am dating a girl that i really really like and she loves me. She is an angel and realy a catch but i am finding it hard to emotionally commit to her- (its complicated because she plans to move overseas for 2 years and then come back to be with me). In my alone time I cry relentlessly. I have emotional freak outs. My mind goes back in flashabacks to my failed relationship and all the people i lost whilst in that relationship. I have this constant throbbing in my head. I dont know weather to do a long relationship or just move back home with my friends and family? Also I dont know is wrong with my emotions, wellbeing-flashbacks- do i have PTSD? depression? I find it hard to see any positives in life despite my career success and this new amazing woman.

Whitepoppy61 I feel like a robot (not reacting in general, less emotions, no personality etc)
  • replies: 4

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobb... View more

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobbies (video games). These days, I'm studying hard, watching stuff or asleep. I can't even remember the last time I laughed genuinely (I smile politely or fake my laugh) As a result, people find me very awkward and boring or fake and so it became difficult to socialise with new people. Previously, I've been called out before for having no personality but dismissed it since I'm naturally quiet. However, I realised other quiet people react to stuff and have better social lives, which made me reflect upon myself. Now, I'm concerned that I'm incapable of reacting, having no personality and just having fewer emotions as a whole. This was a problem I always had but failed to notice it until HSC started. I believe this has happened since year 9 though, my old friends commented that I changed in that year. Examples of me not reacting: A person claimed my crush liked me and I replied with an "oh" (she even asked why I'm not reacting). Another example included a person talking to me about a problem of hers, in which I listened with a blank face (she even muttered 'that was boring'). In general, I don't react to videos or topics people try to talk about with me. The only topics I actively engage in would be HSC or school stuff (another reason why I feel like a robot, I mostly inform people) Since then, I've become super self-conscious about the way I converse with others which worsened my social anxiety (I was already shy and self-conscious). It came to the point that I even actively try to minimise my interactions with acquaintances, simply because I'm scared of being judged for my robotic type of personality. I have always been judged since chilehood for my introverted nature, I don't want to risk worsening their impressions of me. Sometimes, I ask my best friend for reassurance that I have a personality. He says I have a silent type of personality, but I feel like there's a deeper reason for this. I'm scared there's probably a mental issue hidden but it's honestly difficult to tell. Moreover, the way people judge me makes me feel like it's a huge flaw, which doesn't help my self-esteem at all. I'm sorry if this is all over the place, but I just wanted to voice out my thoughts and i'm feeling so confused about this.

Fee29 Stress, anxiety and depression breaking up my relationship
  • replies: 1

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past... View more

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past three or so months the health issues have been increasingly worse. I suffer with the constant worry and anxiety that I will be unwell at work, at a social event or even just at home and that it will start ruining my life. I am almost always in a constant state of pain and when I’m not I’m worrying that I going to be. On top of this, I have a very stressful job which requires me to be there a lot, have a lot of responsibilities and I don’t get the needed rest I require. My family lives in the uk so I also struggle with support and missing them. I have been diagnosed with severe anxiety and mild depression. My partner is not very sympathetic or empathetic and finds it hard to understand it all. I often get overly sensitive and upset over little things. My partner always threatens to break up with me and calls me crazy when I have an anxiety attack. He often sits there and tells me I’m losing the plot when I’m crying until I snap at him and he gets the chance to leave the conversation. I understand my anxiety, stress and depression affects him directly as he is living with me and I have just started reaching out for support and help. When we get into arguments, the increased stress often leads to my asthma getting worse, he acts like that I’m making my asthma get worse on purpose to get out of the argument and gets angry at me for having an asthma attack. He doesn’t see any of this as the effects of my declining mental health and rather than supporting me, is trying to tell me that we should just give up. I feel like he only wants me when I’m happy and anxiety free. I don’t understand how someone can be so intent on ending the relationship when only a day prior he was asking my dad for advice on where to take me for a surprise holiday.

ROSEEM im sad
  • replies: 1

Today at uni a conversation triggered me and now i am feeling blank and emotionless. I do not want this to spiral into one of my depressive episodes. I am already on antidepressants and see a psychologist, just looking for something motivating or tho... View more

Today at uni a conversation triggered me and now i am feeling blank and emotionless. I do not want this to spiral into one of my depressive episodes. I am already on antidepressants and see a psychologist, just looking for something motivating or thought provoking so i don't spend the next month in bed.

Aye I feel like I'm about to lose everything
  • replies: 2

At the start of last year, I felt like I had everything together. I had a good job that made me proud to tell people about, I had just moved in with my now finace. I had everything I wanted more or less. After 5 months I injured my knee working (door... View more

At the start of last year, I felt like I had everything together. I had a good job that made me proud to tell people about, I had just moved in with my now finace. I had everything I wanted more or less. After 5 months I injured my knee working (door to door charity sales, aka alot of walking) so I had to stop as there wasnt a position open for someone who couldn't walk everyday. Then I had to move because of a dodgy Geelong landlord. But it was okay, I just gotten engaged. My life was still pretty awesome. That was july of last year. The 10 months haven't been kind. I've tried everything trying to get a job, and I know people will say "oh not everything" But yes, everything. I've walked around town handing out resumes, I've applied to every job I could do online (on every job board website), I've asked every family member and friend, I've even offered to work for free to some places. And that has been nearly every day of those 10 months. And I know that isn't the be all and end all. But it's starting to be. I can't get out of the house because I have no money, I can't afford rent sometimes, my partner has told me to my face I'm poison because me notting getting a job is affecting her so much that she relapsed on her depression and she's spiralling in one of the most important years of her life. She can't move back into her parents place for reason I can't quite say but she tells me alot she feels trapped and scared that she will end up hating me soon. I mean, I have friends places I can go to and all, but I'm, for the better part, stuck in a lease. She tells me "get a job" but for an indian guy (WHO MIND YOU, WAS BORN HERE AND LIVED HERE MY WHOLE LIFE) with a minor knee disability, it's damn near impossible. Every interview I even get, there are 200+ applications and no matter how confident or outgoing and willing I am to any interviewer, I still don't get a second round. So I'm stuck, real stuck. And I'm about to lose everything I have. It's my fault, and there's not even anything I can do to stop it. I know this isn't really the place to ask, but what can I do..? I feel so utterly dejected and hate myself for just being. Its gotten to the point where every morning I wake up and feel like walking until I just drop. I don't know what to do and I'm so lost.

Ellie_B Sexually nervous
  • replies: 2

HI. Im only 18 and just started uni, living on campus. I have only ever kissed boys before and there is such a huge expectation at uni and it makes me feel pressured. I am attracted to lots of guys but whenever a guy shows interest i get so nervous a... View more

HI. Im only 18 and just started uni, living on campus. I have only ever kissed boys before and there is such a huge expectation at uni and it makes me feel pressured. I am attracted to lots of guys but whenever a guy shows interest i get so nervous and turn them down. I want a boyfriend and to do stuff with guys but don't know why I get so fridget. I am nervous I don't know what I am doing but people say everything gets better with experience. ideas anyone?