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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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Jayne20 Feeling alone
  • replies: 1

Hello, I’m quite sure how ti start one of these our really sure how my words will turn out as this is the first step I’ve ever taken to speak out. I have recently discovered I have anxiety which wasn’t really a shock as I have thought I might be for ... View more

Hello, I’m quite sure how ti start one of these our really sure how my words will turn out as this is the first step I’ve ever taken to speak out. I have recently discovered I have anxiety which wasn’t really a shock as I have thought I might be for quite some time. I’m an 18 year old who’s just finished my first year of uni and I can’t help but shake the feeling that I’m all alone I made friends through this year but they started telling other things about me that won’t and true and would put me down when I didn’t do what they wanted me too, I went to find help and I’m doing so discovered who much these people I called friends were actually hurting me and that’s why I’ve turn to this page because even though I should be happy I feel empty and I was hoping to find someone who to might be like me some who’s described as the happiest and bubbliest person in the room but on the inside feels very alone and closed of from others.

Eddie19 Just asked for my first job.
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I don't really know what help I need right now, but I want to write this down to get it out of my head. I'm a university student and just finished my second year. I've always been a good student, getting good grades. But I hate the uni studen... View more

Hi all, I don't really know what help I need right now, but I want to write this down to get it out of my head. I'm a university student and just finished my second year. I've always been a good student, getting good grades. But I hate the uni student lifestyle, and the party lifestyle, and desperately want to start doing something where I feel useful and satisfied. I enjoyed manual arts in school, topped one of the classes in my final year and was on good terms with all the teachers in the department. I was well ahead in the course content and was one of the students they would go to for side projects and help with errands. I want to feel useful like that again, but any opportunities in university assume knowledge or people skills, and I have zero confidence in my ability to find even a basic job. On the other side of it, I have the skills and ability to be a good student and get myself into university to study science, and don't feel like I can ask for or make good use of any support programs for mental health/entering the workforce (Asperger's, anxiety and depression, can't remember which psychologists diagnosed what or how many years ago. Long story). In other words, I have 'potential' and people assume that I'm doing well. I managed to ask for one job at a small bike store (friendly people, technical work and I rely on a bike to get everywhere myself), was told they're full up and to leave a resume. And that's... wonderful, but I feel crushed even though that interaction went well. I feel like a failure. I feel like I'm slipping through the cracks, and I feel really alone.

cripjay15 life is just getting too much
  • replies: 18

i am just really struggling at the moment. the past 18 months have been hell. i feel like i can’t escape the constant voice in the back of my head telling me to feel how to feel. exams aren’t even what i am anxious about it’s my “friends” who make me... View more

i am just really struggling at the moment. the past 18 months have been hell. i feel like i can’t escape the constant voice in the back of my head telling me to feel how to feel. exams aren’t even what i am anxious about it’s my “friends” who make me feel like this. classes are the easy part. happiness just seems to be getting further and further away. i just can’t find a way to get out of the darkness. i want and need help but i just don’t know how to get to it.

asianaussie Hating still being single and unpopular at 22
  • replies: 5

In financial and professional terms, I am doing well and succeeding. I am currently working a part-time job and own a Freelance Massage/Beauty business. I have recently been accepted to study Massage Therapy at a high-level institution. Despite strug... View more

In financial and professional terms, I am doing well and succeeding. I am currently working a part-time job and own a Freelance Massage/Beauty business. I have recently been accepted to study Massage Therapy at a high-level institution. Despite struggles, I have worked hard and persevered to achieve these successes. Yet my social life is lacking. Already being unpopular since school, I have struggled to make friends, and been rejected by many guys I liked. Many of my ex and current classmates are already dating, married, having kids, getting to travel to countries, succeeding at careers/businesses and it looks like life is just perfect for them and many people like them. Looking at social media makes me jealous and depressed, like why is this happening to me? Why am I still a virgin? Why haven't I been in proper relationships/dates at 22? Why am I so incompetent with 'connecting' with people and feel drained/alienated instead? At this stage, I've barely been seeing anyone outside my family/work, due to feeling disconnected. On top of that I've had to deal with disgruntled clients, work conflicts, and negative reviews about my work performance/customer service. As if I already need to keep being reminded how shitty I am as a person. Currently, I have a crush on a guy who I know at my current workplace. We get along well together and he is typically nice. As a result, I started having feelings obviously. I started inviting him out for dinners post-work, which he kept refusing. Eventually, he told me that he was dating someone else and that I was being too forceful and forward. It really broke me. I've tried reading 'dating advice' and it seems that I fit most of the things that would repel people away, not attract them. Now things are awkward between us and he's tried to avoid talking with me aside from work orders. It sounds so vain I know, but right now I feel so lonely and insecure. I know there's many things I should be grateful for and I am. Yet with peers my age, I lack social competency. Having grown up being bullied and outcasted in school, it just doesn't feel right that I'm still struggling with this at 22. That I still feel conflicted and unhappy that I'm like this. That I can't seem to interest or attract anyone, that whatever successes I have is barely celebrated or comparable to others successes. I don't really know what I can offer. Would appreciate opinions, support, advice no matter how honest it is.

Ceras Goofed big time, overwhelmed. Got advice for a uni intern?
  • replies: 1

Hi all! I've done a silly. I made some, really terrible decisions. I'm a 2nd yr Advanced Science student. I've been doing an a lab internship lab at uni - 140 hr requirement which I started at beginning of the year. I have 40 hrs left. I need to get ... View more

Hi all! I've done a silly. I made some, really terrible decisions. I'm a 2nd yr Advanced Science student. I've been doing an a lab internship lab at uni - 140 hr requirement which I started at beginning of the year. I have 40 hrs left. I need to get a move on - my progress has been so slow and people need the data soon. In July I was allowed to take part in an extra project on limpets with a PhD student I know. Since the initial meeting I have done practically nothing. Like, had the meetings, went in for a couple hours work. The whole time I struggled to prioritise. I was caught between my finances, family pressure, low confidence, university courses and my internship. I had enough time during the semester. I got so caught in a fog of these different things that I was paralysed, and I allowed myself to make excuses because I just couldn't prioritise. I knew that. But I told myself I didn't have time to step back and organise my sh** due to my university courses. Realistically, I could have. I didn't. Now, that failure is eating me up. I feel I need to apologise because even if I was going to do that (agree, then not work on it for months) I should have at least communicated. This is a huge opportunity and I've let it go ass up due to my lack of decisionmaking. Now anxiety and fear of re-introducing myself to this project and finding my way forward after dropping off the face of the Earth is stopping me from going into the lab to do work, even a week after finishing final exams. I need to get past this and make amends, even if I'm booted from the project. But I don't know how. It'll be out of the blue, not knowing anymore where I stand, and not knowing how it'll go or how much I can do. I want to talk to the PhD student in person to apologise, but I'm honestly terrible at this stuff - wording, and the bit where you don't cry in your kind-of-workplace filled with people who could make or break your career if they chose. I haven't spoken to my actual supervisor since February due to his busy-ness, and the fact that I never actually got to know or work with him - I was handed off to PhD students and then to the other big name in the department. I will need to, I should, but I frankly just don't know how. Communication with him disappeared nearly as quickly as it started. I feel like I'm just floating around in this whole situation and environment and I can't grab onto anything to reassure myself about what I need to do and how. And it's still paralysing me.

Tuilop How do you stand up for yourself?
  • replies: 6

Hey everyone, So I have been having this issue for a while; whenever someone is arguing with me or they try to fight me I end up running away from the situation, even if they discriminate me or just make fun of me... Even the guy who tries to argue w... View more

Hey everyone, So I have been having this issue for a while; whenever someone is arguing with me or they try to fight me I end up running away from the situation, even if they discriminate me or just make fun of me... Even the guy who tries to argue with me he just confronts me that I don't fight for myself. I just don't want to be involved in any arguments at school it bothers me that I can't fight for myself when people make fun of me I just don't want to create drama I have told them to stop but of course saying stop doesn't do anything. Hopefully this can get resolved soon because it really bothers me, Tuilop.

Thebluepineapple Bulimic,Bi & all alone
  • replies: 8

Trying to adjust to a new school in senior year, been there for a week and i have found no like minded people. Suggestions?

Trying to adjust to a new school in senior year, been there for a week and i have found no like minded people. Suggestions?

Sylva I feel emptiness inside of me
  • replies: 1

I’m lost with words and emotions right now. I’ve had sleepless nights and cry myself to sleep. People would label me as the brightest person in the room yet I feel the darkest. It’s an effort to put myself out there and visit friends or to talk to my... View more

I’m lost with words and emotions right now. I’ve had sleepless nights and cry myself to sleep. People would label me as the brightest person in the room yet I feel the darkest. It’s an effort to put myself out there and visit friends or to talk to my family about how I feel inside. If I did I would automatically change the subject about them to not talk about myself, I have always done that. But I’m so exhausted in seeing how other people are because no one asks how I am. Im only 24 and life seems to be so hard that I can’t bare to be at work or around my friends or even love my partner of 4 years. I recently had helped a good friend of mine that got out of a abusive relationship. I let her and her new born baby live with us as like she was my own blood family. I did everything I could do just to get her back into her feet. A month or so had past and she had been saying dishonest things and she ended up going back to the man she said she hated. She had messaged me and said she had left and said it was all a lie just for her to receive payment from the government. That she would rip the government off ? After all this had happened I felt every emotion running through my body. All my happiness I had just gone. I am the type of person who would do anything for a friend and would help anyone if needed. People had told me it’s her fault that I shouldn’t worry but that’s not what I am most concerned about. I’m not concerned about her or anyone else but myself because I feel empty and miserable. I find myself daydreaming about nothing and just staring at a wall. I feel like somethings really wrong with me inside but I am to afraid to talk face to face with someone because I can’t get the words out. I struggle to tel my family because they see me as the happiest sister or daughter of the family (the clown). I’m afraid my partner won’t be bothered to listen to my own problems and he might just walk away. I feel emptiness inside of me and I’m afraid of it.

london1298 Stepmother hates me and is ruining my relationship with my dad
  • replies: 5

My dad and I used to be so close, we would hang out every day, but when my parents split up and my dad started seeing my stepmum i started to see him less and less. Partially because she obviously disliked me, because he didn't make an effort anymore... View more

My dad and I used to be so close, we would hang out every day, but when my parents split up and my dad started seeing my stepmum i started to see him less and less. Partially because she obviously disliked me, because he didn't make an effort anymore, and because I never felt welcome in that house. They both moved to a different city and now i see him twice a year at most. about 4 months ago I was staying at my dads house and coincidentally my mum (who is the kindest, loveliest person ever) was also in the city with my stepfather. I had been up all night because I had a bad cold and couldn't breathe, my dad and stepmum were at work and so I called my mum because I was still struggling so hard to breathe. She got an uber to my dads house and sat with me while we waited for an ambulance to come. When we arrived at the hospital they did so many tests and found out that I had pneumonia and bronchitis. My dad didn't bother to leave work early, but came to the hospital to sit with me. The whole time he was on his phone and when I asked him why he said that my stepmum was very angry that my mum had been in her house. She did not care nor did she ask how I was, she was furious that when I was so unwell and couldn't reach her or my dad, I asked for my mum to come and help me. That is ridiculous and hurtful. I was released from hospital at 8pm that night and went back to my dads house. on the way home my dad said that because my stepmum was so angry, she probably wouldn't come out of her room to see me. This really is a depiction of her as a person; really couldn't give a damn about me, just herself. So I laid down to rest and I heard them fighting. My stepmother called my mum a B*tch that spreads lies about her and said that she hated my sister and I. I didn't want to be in that house so I left and sat on the curb crying. my dad followed me out and drove me to my mums hotel room. she never said sorry for the awful things she said about my mum and my sister. My mother always encouraged me to have a good relationship with my stepmum and tried to help me see things from my stepmoms side when I would get upset about something. My stepmum said horrible things about my family and didn't care at all that I was unwell. I don't think she was sorry for what she said I just think she's sorry that I heard her. My dad has tried to get me to reconcile with her but I don't know if i want to. But im scared that if i don't I will lose any relationship I have with my dad.

Nelliel Tu Grandpa's alzheimer's and my dyslexia (and dyscalculia) in school
  • replies: 1

this is a bit heavy but. my grandpa was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a year ago or so and he has only gotten worse. His medication is not working anymore and he has become more violent. this is not my grandpa it's not the same man I grew up with. I fee... View more

this is a bit heavy but. my grandpa was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a year ago or so and he has only gotten worse. His medication is not working anymore and he has become more violent. this is not my grandpa it's not the same man I grew up with. I feel scared for my grandma. she has become afraid of him. he threatened to kill her if she put him in a nursing home and I think she is slowing starting to become less and less mentally well. Don't worry there are people around who are investigating how violent he is, things are being done. this has put lots of pressure on my mum since she is an only child and is the only one who can take care of them and i miss my old grandpa and I want to help but I feel so useless. this happened just before my exams and now I'm sitting in my final year and feel like I can't go to school now. I'm so tired of being tired. as you can imagine this impacted my grades and now I am feeling even more powerless as I have my exams result back. My dyslexia and dyscalculia have always been an insecurity of mine but now it's even more powerful as one of my teachers told me what I hear every time "your ideas are good it's just getting them on paper." I'm so tired of having to keep this inside and worrying whether I'm a burden on others. (sorry I just needed to rant)

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