Anxiety suddenly worse than ever

[just_let_go]

Me again!

Starting around Sunday, my symptoms have worsened.. Right now it feels like someone is pressing down on my temples and I feel extremely uneasy. Last week for about 2 - 3 days I felt like my old self again, and I thought It may have been over! It's like this week my anxiety has just said, "Don't kid yourself, I'm still here, and watch this, I can make you feel worse than ever!"

I am having huge troubles sleeping. I have this uneasy anxious feeling that goes on all night. Then I wake up ever more anxious than before which perfectly describes today. It's at the point where I dread going to bed. Whenever I start to feel like I'm starting to get on top of this I just get thrown back another 2 steps. And when I'm not anxious I'm depressed.

Yesterday I got a referral to a psychiatrist to talk about medication. I've tried beating this without it but it's clearly not working. The more I read about medication the more I'm unsure about it. People talk about things like becoming chemically dependent, or missing one pill makes your depression and anxiety twice as bad. I can't even imaging how bad that is. 

I suppose I'm just tired of trying so hard to overcome all this and just getting defeated every time. The fact that I'm feeling worse than ever right now just proves I've gone no where. I'm really hoping medication helps. If I don't get a good night sleep soon I might lose my mind! 

[just_let_go]

I also just found out that on Monday week I have to go to Queensland for work by myself for a week. Not sure how I'm going to cope. 

[NicoleP]

I am sorry to hear that your are struggling at the moment.

Have you been to your GP? I found sleeping tablets worked wonderfully for me when I really needed them and I am not dependent on them at all.

I have also found that medication has made my life a lot simpler and I find that they make a big difference to me. I don't care if I am dependent on them - they make each day that big easier. I have missed medication before and with the ones I am on, it doesn't seem to make a difference.

Take care of yourself

KezzaA

[just_let_go]

Hi KezzaA, 

Thanks for the reply. It is soothing to know that your medication has only done good things for you. I am just thinking, what if I take the medication, and see an improvement, but just like now, it slowly just gets as bad or worse? Then what?

Sorry, I'm in a huge state of worry at the moment and I probably sound a bit ridiculous. I'm glad to see that you are doing well. I went to my GP yesterday and got a referral to a Psychiatrist. Will be seeing her/him next Wednesday to discuss treatments. 

Take care.  

[Chloekat84]

Glad to hear that your going to see a psychiatrist so soon. I see mine for the first time next monday so feeling a bit nervous. Do talk to your GP as sleeping pills really help in the short term when u need sleep and AD's really do help with your mental well being. I'm on them as well as anti psychotics and it just stabilizes my mood so i don't fall into that bad depression and anxiety again. Really hope u feel better soon. Much love and care x

[NicoleP]

I have a lovely psychiatrist who is non-judgemental, supportive and understanding. We even share a joke or two. Chloekat84, I understand that you must be feeling nervous but a psychiatrist deals with this type of issue every day and is there to help you. I feel confident for you that all will go well.

Manipulator - as far as medication goes I try to think like this. If I had high blood pressure, I would take medication for it and that if my blood pressure was no longer being controlled by the medication, that my doctor would change the medication or the dose. I see the same for anxiety/depression.

Keep posting about your trip to QLD next week - I understand that it is a difficult time for you.

Thinking of you both

KezzaA

[Chloekat84]

Thanx for the encouragement Kezza. Im sure it will go fine im just nervous as i don't know what to expect and its a stranger that im going to be talking about my feelings etc to. I'm sure it'll be ok. Hope your having a good day! Take care x

[Zoe__lt_3]

Hi Manipulator,

I agree with what Kezza said, sometimes medication is perfectly okay in the right dose. I’ve been on AD’s for a while now and I find no really negative symptoms, but they have calmed my internal storm a lot. I have much more peaceful days now, way more than I ever thought possible.

And the most amazing thing occurred – I realised I now had patience. Until taking AD’s, I had no idea how highly-strung I was, how impatient and stressed I had been for so many years. That alone was wonderful.

Maybe think about talking to your GP about it and discuss medication. No GP will force you if you don’t want to, but if you do, give them a try for a month and see what happens. Like Kezza, if I’m dependant upon them I don’t really care as long as they keep working like they are. 🙂

Zoe x

[just_let_go]

Hey Chloe, I think Kezza put it really well in saying that they deal with this stuff every day and know what they are doing. Nothing is expected of you so don't worry too much. I'm looking forward to my visit, especially after hearing what you all had to say. I hope it is the start of a new, happier chapter in my life. 

Hi Kezza, I love the comparison. That makes so much sense now. Thank you. I leave next Monday. I must admit I'm quite anxious about it. Even flying. I've been on a plane more times than I can count, but not since my anxiety has been worse. I might need some medication to get through the landing. Overall I think I will be ok though. I'm good at m job, and looking forward to warmer weather! 

Hi Zoe, that is exactly what I needed to hear. I am so glad that you were able to find such a vast improvement in your life. Interesting that you mentioned patience as I've noticed how shocking mine as been lately. Whether it's been stuck in traffic, someone asking too many questions at work, not being able to fix something at work I've noticed my patience being very thin. I've also noticed that I rush EVERYTHING I do! Hopefully I see the same result as you did, that would be fantastic. 

You guys have definitely put some of my concerns at ease. Thank you. I am looking forward to discussing medication now. 

A small update with me and my sleeping problem, I moved my computer and all electrical out of my bedroom and made my bedroom into nothing else than a bed room... Slept much better last night. I also exercised for an hour and switched off everything hours before bed, and read for half an hour just before. It really helped! Might help someone else who reads this 🙂 

[NicoleP]

Good to hear from you Manipulator. You sound much happier and it sounds as though you are sleeping better. I had a good day at work - I am always pleased to reach the end of the week and this one has been a particularly stressful one (see my posts on the workplace forum). Anyhow, my boss wasn't at work today and so it was much less stressful.

. I flew to Sydney last weekend to run in the CIty to Surf and I know what you mean about flying - I was anxious about the flight but kept telling myself that everything was going to be OK. I am away this weekend and so may not be able to post. I have trouble posting via my phone. I am excited and nervous though - I will be attempting marathon number 23 and am going into the run without  having done much training.

Keep in touch and I hope all goes well in QLD.

Chloekat84 - let us know how it all goes on Monday.

KezzaA xx