New to BB

[solotraveller]

Hi I'm new to BB & to forums. After 10 years of poor choices smoking, alcohol, drugs, dv relationships etc. I made the brave move to walk away from it ALL and now I'm feel lost my life at a cross roads and it should be this wonderful time with endless possibilities, instead its more like endless questions. Unsure where to go? or what my next move is? just after someone to be able to relate.

[blondguy]

Hi Solo

Welcome to the forums and good on you for posting too!

you are among friends here. The crossroads and barriers that we have had to overcome are a sign of innate strength.....

Just some background for you. Ive used to have chronic anxiety which morphed into depression 21 years ago.

I understand your situation about the endless questions and the crossroads too. Thats a good question about what your next move is.

I am fortunate as to appreciate what I have and thankful for it. (after years of counseling)

As where loneliness is concerned.....thats a hard one

I think we know deep down (sometimes) the answer to your question Solo. Its sometimes really hard to find the light (guidance) to show us the way.

you are not alone here

my kind thoughts for you

Paul

[white knight]

Hi solo, welcome

After chasing my tail in my 20's, rejecting society a few times, poor relationship choices etc, yes in 1996 l was lost.

I had two daughters 7 and 4yo. They remained with their mother. Initially l lived in a 3 metre long caravan in a caravan park. I didnt belong there. I had to find my "home". So l created it.

It meant a big commitment, buy land, buy a kit house and built it while working long hours shiftwork. The home was in a small country town. Eventually l ended up in another home further away from the city. Now l am in the home l call home.

So, you need some ingredients to find yourself whatever that is. Take some time to realise your dream...seek it.

Another aspect for happiness is company. Living alone can be lonely. But again, that is your decision.

Its great you have found such courage. It isnt easy giving up "fixes". Well done. But with each step you should increase your effort. Thats how Kathy Watt earned her gold medal.

Here are a few threads to help. Google them. Good luck.

Topic: 30 minutes can change your life- beyondblue

Topic: the best praise you'll ever get- beyondblue

Topic: be radical- beyondblue

Topic: the balance of your life- beyondblue

Tony WK

[solotraveller]

Thank you for replying blondguy. I have felt the strength it's nearly a year since I turned my life around I used all the momentum to achieve my goals to a better life and now I don't know what to do. I'm struggling to see the light at the end of a tunnel I feel like I have just enter a new tunnel and don't know what turns are ahead. I feel like I'm whinging when I know others are doing it harder than I am. It's so nice for you to respond. I also have anxiety and have my bouts of depression

[blondguy]

Hi Solo

No worries at all. You are not whinging at all. If Beyond Blue didnt have new posters there would be no forums so mega thanks for posting 🙂

I am glad you are here and understand me too as the light at the end of the tunnel does vary for me too

I joined in January 2016 after being made redundant (depression kicked back in) I didnt have the guts you have by creating my own thread for about 8 weeks. Great stuff Solo..I wish I had the strength you have

The forums are a judgemental free zone. The choices you made may not have been good ones but it means you are human. We are flawed and imperfect.

No one will judge or patronise you here. Your presence is respected and appreciated 🙂

This is your thread Solo. You are more than welcome to post on it even if you just want a chat.

There are many gentle people that can be here for you

kindest thoughts and happy to be here for you

Paul

[solotraveller]

Thank you both for your kind words and support it's a refreshing change. Although I am blessed with a caring family my friends and partners have been at timesless than than that and I'm still healing from emotional trauma and coming to realise that my feelings matter too. I've always been a person to put others first and usually at my own expense and then because I have put others first when they aren't happy I get depressed because I feel like I haven't done enough the physical scars have healed and to from an outsiders position I look like I'm fine but I have a lot of emotions to heal I'm to scared at this point to go and make friends because I don't want the same patterns to develop