migration,winters and work issues

[DadHubbyITguy]

Hi people,

I am a middle aged man, recently moved to this beautiful country with my partner and a kid. As I anticipated, the move has been a pressure. Talking about work first, while I quickly found a job commensurate to my skills, the cultural differences(I'm a south-asian) at workplace have been more bothersome than the work itself. I have been a super achiever in my profession(in my home country) and believe in working hard and making my way forward. My attitude is not well received by colleagues at current workplace as my opinion and work are not valued and appreciated. Then on the personal front, I feel sorry for my partner who has been managing the kid alone while I'm at work and often I'm too exhausted to be of help when I'm back home. Most importantly, I've been an outdoor person and have always enjoyed physical activities, the winters in Victoria have made me home bound and I feel sick of not being able to go out and in some sense take control of my life.

Amidst all this, It was was only through pure serendipity that I found beyondblue. I look forward to finding some good support from the community.

Warmest Regards,

[Nurse_Jenn]

Hi DadHubbyITGuy,

Welcome to the forum. I migrated to this wonderful country 15 years ago so I have some experience with what you are feeling. Adjusting to a new culture, new climate and new way of working is not always easy. Working in nursing in a new country was really tough at times but after many years, being adaptable and having a broader understanding of health globally has taken me to some really interesting positions that I would have never considered back home. Change (even if it is a positive change) can be difficult. Be kind to yourself during this period of transition.

What sounds really important here is that you find a new healthy outlet where you can self care. This might be re-defining what type of outdoor physical activity you engage in. There are many countries in the world where it is cold most of the year (I am from one of them) and people get waterproof thermal gear, wind breakers, warm socks etc. ... and get amongst it. If it is important to you to be outside for you mental wellbeing, you might find that you can adjust with finding some new equipment that helps you adjust to the new climate. It won't be exactly the same as in SE Asia but with some trial and error, I know you can find an activity that you enjoy. In some places around Australia you can search for a like minded group for many activities such as running, walking or cycling etc. You can check out this website called MeetUp if this interests you. https://www.meetup.com/en-AU There are often other community groups posted at the local library.

Starting at a new job can also be tough, especially if your enthusiasm is not matched by your colleagues. I am not sure how long you have been at your new job but sometimes it can take a little while to get to know the culture of a workplace. You might find that this company doesn't fit what you are looking for in an employer. Or you might also find that your drive and motivation is just what the company needs. One option is to use your workplace employment support program and take to a counsellor there (usually this is a free confidential service) or you could even call the beyondblue support line on 1300 22 4636.

You have taken a great step by reaching out here and I encourage you to move around the forum as there are many people adjusting to all different life circumstances. You are not alone. Keep us posted on any strategies you have found helpful.

Wishing you the best possible outcome,

Nurse Jenn