Members new and old, introduce yourselves here

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone,

This is (what will hopefully become) a mega-thread for members, new and old, to introduce themselves.  I'll kick off:

My name is Chris Banks and I’m the online communities manager at beyondblue. Basically, I’m here to help out, contribute to discussions, and answer any questions you may have about beyondblue. I work with a team of moderators behind-the-scenes who keep the forums running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I’m 37, originally from New Zealand, and have worked as a filmmaker, journalist, and musician.  I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in the mental health sector too. I have lived experience of bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety, and have been living in Melbourne for nearly two years. In my spare time I enjoy movies, music, hanging out with mates, and I barrack for Hawthorn, much to the disgust of some of our regular members!

I’m not a psychologist or counsellor (although I have seen a fair few of them), so I can’t give medical advice. Like everyone else here, I can provide peer support only.
I really enjoy being part of the community and virtually meeting the many different people of all ages who come through everyday, even if they're not feeling the best when they arrive on the doorstep. Hopefully in your time here you'll feel less alone, and pick up some tips and encouragement for the journey.  

(passes on the talking stick)

PLEASE NOTE: This thread is for introductions only, if you have an issue you would like to discuss ongoing with the community, please start a new thread with your topic in the appropriate section.

[Taz2u]

Hello everyone. I have had depression for most of my life and take antidepressants regularly. I've been feeling pretty low lately and teary, yet I'm finding it difficult to say anything to my husband. I have 3 children- 2 grown up and one about to go to College next year, as well as a stepson, 2 daughter-in-laws and 3 grandkids.I spend most of the week alone at home with my dog. I feel very lonely and don't have any siblings or parents nearby. I am finding it hard to get dressed in the mornings and get little satisfaction from most things. I attend church regularly, yet  feel like I have few good friends. My mum was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer and already suffers from Alzheimers. I went over to give my support recently and found myself having to be the strong one for everyone else. I'm tired and wonder who is there for me when I'm in need. My sister didn't support me very much when I was fragile and this is very annoying, even though I know she has a lot on her plate at home too. I cried for the first time last week, shortly after going to bed...I couldn't talk about what i was feeling because it was overwhelming. My husband asked me what was wrong, hugged me then went back to sleep. He never asked me anything after that. His mum is old and has been depressed from chronic pain.She stayed with us last week and I had primary care of her. I feel guilty because I really didn't need someone else to care for, and I didn't feel I was being cared for either. My husband wants to bring her for another week at Christmas. I feel very alone and very tired. I've felt down before, but sometimes it feels like nothing changes. I terrified to stop taking meds, as I can find myself in this black hole even when I take them diligently.

[Blue_Babe]

Hi Everyone,  I decided to join Beyond Blue because I often need to vent my feelings with other people who understand depression.  I'm 47 yrs old and have suffered from depression since I was about 20.  I believe my depression started as a result of my being diagnosed with Infertility at that age (as a result of sexual assault).  My Mum had always said that she felt that I should've had counselling at that time however I thought I was able to deal with it on my own.  Daily I deal with feelings of inadequacy as a "woman" because the "choice" to become a mother was taken from me.  To never hear the word "Mummy" hurts like hell.  To never have birthday parties, to never know what it's like to be a mum in general, has always haunted me..in a very sad way.  I see ladies my age are now Grandmothers..I will never know the joy of the family unit.  It's so unfair!  Christmas time as a child for me was always awesome.  I was the 2nd youngest of 5 children and Christmas was always a joyous occasion spent with family.  Now both my Parents have passed on and life seems so totally empty for me.  I lost my father 10 years ago and My Mum 18 months ago.  They were my biggest support and now I feel totally alone.  Even though I have a loving husband It doesn't take the pain and emptiness away.  I went to a psychologist earlier this year and it really helped me in the way of changing my way of thinking and I started to begin to feel a little happier and began to think positively.  It seems though that my depression tends to come in waves.  I feel happy for a while and then It starts to creep back in again after a few months.  I just feel like I have nothing to look forward to in this life.  I have very supportive siblings and they are grateful for their love and support but it doesn't take the pain and disappointment away that I have to deal with.  It would be so nice to be happy again.  Thanks everyone for being here for me when I need to talk.  Just in need of support from people who understand how I'm feeling.  So if you can identify with me please I welcome your advice.  

[Jacko777]

About time I introduced myself...G'day, I'm Jacko.

What an amazing beautiful caring loving bunch of people on Beyond Blue. I am privileged and humbled to take part. You guys do a terrific thing that is so important, getting people to talk, share their emotions, help them to find the support they need and deserve. Anyway, that's enough about you!

Briefly, I have had my share of pain. I have suffered from depression and fears. With therapy and a continuous spiritual journey I have greatly improved my calmness and happiness. On BB I haven't spoken much about spirituality, it means so many different things to different people. I could talk about spirituality for days...so I won't start now! 

I believe that LOVE IS EVERYTHING. If I hold love in my heart in each moment without the curtains of my mind then my fears are conquered and I can respond to life with love, calmness and truthfulness. So I guess I am on BB cause I have some love to give, I don't draw any lines, everyone deserves to be loved, yep, everyone!

Love to you all, you make me a proud human when I see your fine efforts.

[forest]

Hi everybody, twenty years ago my partner passed away, not long after I started suffering from anxiety, panic attacks, I got help and fully recovered. nineteen years later a week ago the anxiety and panic attacks have returned with vengeance and am having a very hard time coping, im sure I know what triggered it, ive always been afraid of confined spaces, wont go in lifts, im supposed to be going on a cruise in five weeks for Christmas and new year to Vanuatu, as the time has been getting closer I noticed I was getting more anxious, I know the ships big but I found my self going on line looking at deck plans, where my room was on the ninth floor, the corridors were so narrow, looking at where all the doors our for easy escape but hey im on a ship in the middle of the ocean, what if I have a panic attack , theres no where for me to go, and then that was it im having panic attacks , im scared, im in Darwin working for the next few years, my daughters flying up from Adelaide tomorrow for a month, been on antidepressants for four days but have told me that it will take a couple of weeks to start working, im so anxious keep thinking im gonna die when I have panic attack, ive started seeing psychologist, and yes ive cancelled my cruise and I feel like a real failure at the moment, I just want these horrible feelings to go.   

[Micks_mix]

Hi all,    It is bit overwhelming where to  start,so I guess that it is all ready starting to work, and. Having to focus.

its all ok for all you typing skilled ones, there u go , learn to type better.

im 75 years and at the xroad, get better or worse. The first thing I am trying to establish is how to set up a help system so will float my idea as we go.

more about me....I was self employed for most all my life, and they all worked quite well, and all the network of people that goes with being out and about. 

I served the community as an elected councillor on three councils and other local groups, and this with my private enterprises gave me a lot of identity. This has now zeroded.  I know that is very important, and need to engage, but know procastination is not a good friend.

i live on 200 acres of fringe rural land and an exceptional Eco area,30k to Cbd.   I have 4kids all setup, but one with mental.disbility, not as bad as some others.

   15 years ago the marriage showed unwanted erosion, and we separated 7 years ago, amiable, but leaves big hole,but still lingering.

having had a lot of experience with troubled daughter, working thru physcologist, has left me very cynical of some of  the practises, so we have a lingering situation with the 33 year old girl.

 This is my first attempt to try and get involved with my position and set up a go to arrangement so as to get progressing.

 I would suggest that anxiety and depression is calling the shots, along with the mongrel procastination and lack of decision. My  leaning or dreaming, is for a mentor/companion to help manage the issues, not all mentioned here yet. This could include some proffesional help where needed, and what would they get?, access to a wonderful envirenmont and reingage me with network

without commitment and goals it is a hard road .,but it can reinvigorate the body and mind.

im interested to know if some talking groups are available. I also think at doing mentor training, would help to focus? 

There is a saying,   there is nothing new under the sun,   Which could mean there are many others with similar stories. Thanks for listening . micks mix

[Micks_mix]

Hi again, I have just sent a post, but one question I missed, where is the appropriate  site to enter. Micks mix

[Chris_B]

Hi Micks mix,

Welcome to the forums, and thanks for introducing yourself. Please feel free to join in the other discussions that are happening around the place, and if you would like to ask a question, just start a new thread in the section that seems most relevant, eg. depression, anxiety, treatments, etc.

You might also want to have a look at The Shed Online. It's another forum we run, you can use the same login details that you use here and it's a community for older men. You will also be able to discuss where you can meet like minded people offline there through the Mens Sheds.

Hope this helps.

[geoff]

to all the people who have made a comment, boy, we can relate to so many of you who have made your own remarks, so that it would be great to address each comment on it's own, so it would be fair to reply to each one on it's own, so please I encourage you all to post your own comment. Thanks Geoff.

[Gina_61]

Hi I am 61 yrs old and for the first time in my life i have been to the doctors for help, usually i can have a good cry and just get on with it, but this sad state i feel is just there when i wake up, so hard to motivate my self, concentrating at work is hard, but i am trying s. The hard part for me is my husband has  depression, has been on medication for years, and thankfully it is under control now. I was always there for him, still am, I encouraged him  to go to counseling and sat in when asked to. Now i need that support, i thought he would be the one person who i could get help, and understanding  from, unfortunately not, he does not want to talk about it, and would prefer if i talked to out daughters, aged 40 and 34 . Am i really expecting to much?

[Nickname_12690C8B-63FF-4F]

Hi all 🙂

I'm 29 and have 2 beautiful kids aged 5 and 2. I'm originally from Sydney but after moving around a lot as a child and travelling with my hubby we're now settled in Newcastle. I work part time and enjoy spending time with loved ones, concerts, music, movie nights and the beach. 

I have suffered from OCD and anxiety since around the age of 8 or 9. It has taken me this long to actually admit it to myself, as it has reached a point where I can no longer ignore it or keep it hidden. I suffered from severe post traumatic stress and anxiety/panic attacks after the difficult birth of our first child, which I managed to get through with the help of medication (which I no longer take, but am thinking I may need to start again), and an amazing counsellor. Without her and the endless support of my hubby I honestly don't think I'd be here today. 

The OCD has been getting progressively worse over the past 2 years. I attempted to get help and see a psychologist a year ago, but I ended up backing out. I was ashamed, thinking I was the only one who had this horrible thing and that it would just go away by itself. Now I know that neither of those things are true, I feel like I'm finally ready to make the first step to getting better. I know I'll be able to tackle it and beat it, I guess the hardest part is making that first step!

Cheers!
SJ x