Members new and old, introduce yourselves here

Chris_B · ‎01-07-2014

Hi everyone,

This is (what will hopefully become) a mega-thread for members, new and old, to introduce themselves. I'll kick off:

My name is Chris Banks and I’m the online communities manager at beyondblue. Basically, I’m here to help out, contribute to discussions, and answer any questions you may have about beyondblue. I work with a team of moderators behind-the-scenes who keep the forums running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I’m 37, originally from New Zealand, and have worked as a filmmaker, journalist, and musician. I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in the mental health sector too. I have lived experience of bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety, and have been living in Melbourne for nearly two years. In my spare time I enjoy movies, music, hanging out with mates, and I barrack for Hawthorn, much to the disgust of some of our regular members!

I’m not a psychologist or counsellor (although I have seen a fair few of them), so I can’t give medical advice. Like everyone else here, I can provide peer support only.
I really enjoy being part of the community and virtually meeting the many different people of all ages who come through everyday, even if they're not feeling the best when they arrive on the doorstep. Hopefully in your time here you'll feel less alone, and pick up some tips and encouragement for the journey.

(passes on the talking stick)

PLEASE NOTE: This thread is for introductions only, if you have an issue you would like to discuss ongoing with the community, please start a new thread with your topic in the appropriate section.

worriedGirlFriend · ‎27-07-2014

Hi everyone l'm new to the forum and l have a boyfriend that drinks every friday and sat night and l've only been going out with him for 2 months and last sunday he said he wanted to cool this down a bit and wants some space l try to talk to him about things and want he is feeling but he shuts me out or doesnt answer me and feels like he is pushing me away but l just keeping come back for more l haven't seen him all week or spoken to him l want to help him but l don't know what to do

white knight · ‎27-07-2014

Hi Mama7,

I'm so sorry for your family's loss. Please post on this forum anytime. We are a bunch of people that have been through similar situations. I lost my brother in 1979 and my uncle in 2003 both to suicide. My sister and wife have depression and I have several issues.

We are here for you.

PS wonderful of you to travel interstate to break the news in person.

Hops_H75 · ‎28-07-2014

Hey there

Chris, Brisbane, 39, I'm married with 3 kids 11,9,4. I dunno what to say now. I've been feeling down alot. Fights and snarkiness has been sneaking into everyday with the wife. Yelling at the kids a bit too much. Not looking for sympathy just a place to vent.

Thanks

SubduedBlues · ‎28-07-2014

Dear Moderator

A few of the more recent posts, possibly, should be separate threads in their own right, I don't feel comfortable replying to them as doing so would be off topic and continue to exasperate the problem.

Any suggestions?

Struggler · ‎28-07-2014

Hi D'jected

I agree with you.

Struggler

Chris_B · ‎29-07-2014

Hi all,

I know what you mean, but unfortunately we don't have the ability to separate or merge threads at this stage. This thread is clearly marked as an introduction thread, the best suggestion I have is for members to use it as such and to start a separate thread if you wish to have a conversation. If you see this happening, suggest to the person posting that they do this. I'll add this as a reminder to this start of the thread.

schmozzzz · ‎29-07-2014

Hello. My life has been unusual and includes a bit of hardship and abuse. I worked really hard to raise my 3 girls on my own and to get qualifications so that I could get a good job to support them. My career ended at the same time as my relationship with my partner ended. My girls, who ran away from me when they were each 16, 14 and 13 and who are now parents, were too busy with their own lives. I had a bout of "suicide" which made my girls see me because they wouldn't let me out of hospital unaccompanied. But that was 4 years ago, I don't see them much now and I don't get along with my parents or siblings.

I wondered why and found much relief in my ASD (high functioning aspergers) diagnosis. It's comforting to know that it isn't my fault, that there is nothing and can or could have do/done because it is a disability - I am not able to recognise social things.

I came to my diagnosis through my disability employment services providers who had personal experience of it and were able to assist in funding my diagnosis.

Before I sought diagnosis I called my cousin who is receiving electroshock therapy for depression to ask if he had been diagnosed, because the issue is a recognised family trait. He said that he didn't have it but his son did. I think that is denial. Of course those of us who are treated as weirdos, non-normals, social pariahs and don't understand why are going to be depressed (although in my case the psychiatrist said it was dysthaemia). I got a diagnosis.

I am a miserable lonely old woman. And its not my fault. I don't fit in (so potential employers say). The front page of this website talks about indigenous Australians and I have heard the same thing about homosexual australians. I see a lot of effort spent by neurotypical organisations attempting to train infants to be normal. Why can't we accept profound differences (like autism) and recognise it in older people (like me).

Why do I have to struggle so hard for acceptance and work so hard just to talk to someone? Am I alone in this? Don't other people confront these issues too? Why wasn't it recognised by the psychologists and psychiatrists I was seeing while my life was falling apart (before the hospitalisation)? Lotsa questions....

sandy74 · ‎30-07-2014

Hi, I’m 40, Female and very new to this site. Like yourself I don’t see myself as depressed, just sad, yet at present my life is also on the downhill slide. I can resonate I was alcohol dependency. Good on you for not having had a drink. I have not yet reached that point but hope to do so. My “sadness” is related to a marriage that did not happen (was cancelled by me 1 month prior) due to my fiancé cheating on me. The thing I give you credit for is that you have accepted your responsibility regards to alcohol dependency. That is not an easy thing to do. You mentioned you have no assets of my own not even furnishings & I live in a furnished flat courtesy of my best mate. The positive in this is that you have a best mate (glass half full - not half empty) I migrated to Australia in 1983 with my mum, dad and 2 sisters. Besides that I have a 1 uncle my mothers brother. I am making the biggest step of my life and at the end of the year I am moving. currently live on what I call a small island :). I have low self- esteem and low self-confidence in my own abilities, despite what others tell me.Do not feel that your story is not worthy of posting here as everyone is in a different place and deals with things in their own way. I totally hear you on the constant negative self-talk, constant doubt, confusion and just treading water ... I have recently quit my job due to bulling in the workplace and the high pressures of my position ... there are health issues in the family, personal issues issues and family break down, my grandmother also passed away 12 months ago last month. This is in the last 12 months.
However I intend to stay strong ... since leaving work my anxiety levels and lack in self confidence ( as in my 25 years of working not once has my work ethic been questioned) have not been the best. I have been struggling daily. Bit I look forward to every day I wake in the hope that I will make a change.
So I guess that is a little about me. and GuvsDodge's be strong and keep on fighting as that is what it is all about to overcome the things in life that challenge our beliefs and our core.

beyoncebooty · ‎31-07-2014

Hi,

I am here at beyondblue for the support, I've been reading posts on and off for a few weeks now. I lost my brother from suicide in February this year. This year has been the most difficult of my life. My role in my family is to support everyone, I am a 'pillar of strength', try and keep everyone's spirits up and get my family through this tough time. I do not have a support network that has dealt with suicide/depression before (other than my family) so it is comforting to have beyondblue here. Sometimes I feel a bit over my head supporting other people because I forget about myself but I have an amazing husband who always makes sure I'm ok.

I am so sorry for anyone who has had a loss and I feel for everyone who has/have had depression/anxiety in the past. It is such a horrible thing 😞

freemefrommydemons · ‎01-08-2014

Hi, well my name is Nicole. I am 19 and suffering from multiple mental illness.
When I was born I was born with an extra extremity, (extra toe) and as I grew up I thought I was special, however by about the age of 7 I felt out of place and I didnt feel as if I fit in. When I was 7 I had a surgery to remove the extra tow and it has left me with a long scar on my foot, so I never show my feet as I am too embassed of the scar - the surgery left me with complications with would end up affecting me later.
When I was aged 7-11 I suffered multiple encounters of sexual abuse which has left me torn apart. In year 11 (2011) I developed severe anxiety and we are unsure why, this continued and this is when I found out I has a mass/lump in my foot which had to be surgiculy removed. Up until here I was living relitively normally even though I was experiencing anxiety attacks everyday. In 2012 (year 12) my eating disorder had developed into anorexia, and left me very physically and mentally ill , I lost a class mate to suicide and since then everything only got worse. Throughout 2013 I spend 20 weeks in and out of hospital/mental health facilities/ and psyc wards. I attempted to end my life 7 times, and suffered and alcohol addiction. I skipped a lot, but it was this year when I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, I began uni, I still struggle with my eating disorder constantly, also unstablity I can say some things have improved. I am not reliant on hospitals and I am able to catch a bus which I honestly never thoughts would happen again. After a psychotic episode and a few nights in an intensive psyc ward, I have been able to stand on my feet again and once again attempt to take control back over my life.
To all those who have suffered, I am proud of you. The struggle it takes to even get out of bed in the morning is hard enough, but to continue to live your life and fight your demons well it is honestly so inspiring! You are all AMAZING