A warm welcome to you broken568
My heart goes out to you as you face the overwhelming challenge of making some sense out of life at the moment. The curve balls thrown our way can definitely feel senseless and depressing, leaving us with the question 'What's the point of it all, if everything leads to suffering?'
Not too long ago I asked the same question, yet I asked it in search of the answer. Having spent about 15 years in depression earlier in my life, it felt as though I was fighting on an almost regular basis from falling back in again. This was becoming depressing. It had to stop. I had to know why I kept feeling this way. The answer eventually came to me and it was simple, 'Every challenge has the potential to either raise you or bring you down'. When I say 'simple', I'm not implying the challenges are simple to get through. Some feel almost impossible. Some are even fearful, though the question always remains 'Will this challenge raise me or bring me down?' The next question, 'What do I need to do to raise myself through it?' In other words, how am I going to manage? Will I manage on my own or do I need help? Am I going to manage it through what I know or do I need to learn new skills for this challenge? I've also discovered a key to managing involves the question 'What do I need to let go of?' This one's a tough one. For example, in recent times I've stopped tolerating intolerable behaviour. I'd always just sucked up being treated poorly by certain people. I needed to let go of 'tolerating poor behaviour'. It was hard at first, as it involved confrontation at times and confrontation can be somewhat anxiety inducing.
24 years ago, when your world shattered, you raised yourself through this challenging time. 10 years ago, when it happened again, you raised yourself through that challenging time. Do you know how you achieved this on both occasions? Are you fully aware of exactly how you managed? Did you manage through help? Were there things you had to let go of, so as to become a different person in how you coped? Now, this sounds like your 3rd significant challenge in 24 years. Have you given thought to how you're going to raise yourself through this life altering challenge? Does this challenge feel like the biggest one you've ever faced?
If you thought you were someone who could never do anything like this (come to the BB forums), I'm glad you've let go of that belief. Letting go is what has brought you here. Again, a warm welcome to you.
🙂
