hello from within

[Spence]

Hi, my friends call me "Que",I live with depression. I take antidepressants and am aware that I will probably be on these for some time as I become majorly down and self destructive when I stop taking them.

Basically I am a carer for my wife that has multiple sever health problems. Recently had a friend die by their own friend.

I understand the grieving process and normal stages........still, there are times like this when your cup is full and overflowing.

I have been promoting mens health previously and encouraging guys to speak up, rather than taking their own life. There are pressures on guys to "be strong, man up". But we are only human too. 

Basically, I am losing my voice (so to speak). Right now im at a place where I cant talk. I can write but I don't want to hear my own voice. Feel like crying but lack tears. 

This is a lousy intro, but I feel I am standing up in front of the world with my arms open and welcoming any hugs and kind words...whispering "please, help"

[blondguy]

Good Morning Spence

Welcome to the BB Forums

You have a great deal on your plate Spence. With being  carer for your wife who is very ill.....your depression and the very sad and recent death of your friend. My very sincere condolences.

The strength you have by posting is admirable to say the least. I see you have also been involved in promoting mens health..thats also a commitment that shows you have a kind and giving heart. In your position I would be having great difficulty.

The roller coaster that depression gives us is dreadful...You also have your grieving process that really doubles the load you are carrying now.

You sound very knowledgeable about a lot of this so I can only remind you to use 'Gentle Occupation' (distraction) and letting 'Time' pass right now.

You will find peace again soon Spence but the clouds will part and the sun will shine for you again

I wish I could have been of more help to you

We are here for you Spence....It would be great to see how you are going if you wish to post back

Kind Thoughts for you

Paul

[Spence]

Thank You Paul,

I appreciate your kind words.

I find im really anxious at the moment. I know I will move past this, just trying not to topple over the edge as walking a fineline is draining.

I need to be well in order to care and do what must be done.

I work in aged care part time and involved in a lot of palative care......this adds to things.....BUT, it is something I am good at and my people seem to find me comforting. I am a good listener. 

Realy, I need a long break away. We have decided to go camping for a week...sometime soon as it will be what we both need.

Thank you again and I hope to talk you again and see you around the forums.

Take care Paul

[Guest_1055]

Hello Spence

If you still feel like your arms are opened wide, just like your profile picture. Well I would be happy to give you a friendly hug. 

Also I am very sorry for your loss of your friend.

 I don't know what else to say, only that I care. Yes I know I am a stranger, but I still do care about you. And I do hope you both have a restful camping trip. Sounds like an adventure.

Take care now.

Shelley xx

[Spence]

Hello and thank you Shelley. I appreciate that. 🙂