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Desperate to feel normal again
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Hi Mary,
You sound like you are in a pretty good place and that gives me a lot of inspiration. You have a lot to deal with. I read up a bit on Myeloma and it can be manageable, but you would know all about that.
I find reading people's posts here very soothing, I like the stories about people's walking adventures and the "three things I am grateful for" posts. It helps me to be in a more positive frame of mind. You may have noticed I was up around 2 am reading and posting. It actually helped me to get back to sleep after a while because I found it really comforting. You are doing a great job helping people on this forum.
I saw my GP yesterday, and just as you said, he talked about people needing blood pressure medication as an example, and I just have a need to be helped by my AD medication. Just because it is a mental health condition doesn't make it any worse. He knew I was ashamed and he tried to alleviate that. He said the physical symptoms of what I can go through at times can have a worse effect long term on me, than being on long term AD. So I have to look at it more like that. I am feeling rather teary this morning but I know it is because I have to come to terms with the shame again. I'm off for a walk now and then working from home today and out for dinner with family for my husband's bday. So the day has great things in store.
Take care Mary.
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Hello Beatit
Thanks for your post. I am glad you are considering taking an AD. I know all about being ashamed of taking them. It is of course our communities that are scared of mental illness but it's not easy to spot who has and who has not got a MI unless you know someone takes meds. It's unfair as no one would penalise someone who has high blood pressure as your doctor said. Well we have to live with it but public figures are admitting they have depression and other MI which is good.
I listen to ABC Classic on the radio. Two of the announcers revealed their MI on air and had several discussions. Of course there are many sporting people who have also put up their hands on this topic. This is what is going to make MI as acceptable as other illnesses in the community. The spin off from this is that we may heal faster when we can let go of our shame and the desire to hide our MI from others who may think less of us.
I do agree with your doctor about the physical effects of MI which is not always recognised by those with an MI. It can be exhausting to cope with the various ways MI plays out in our lives. Hiding it just puts an extra layer on it all. When we are recognised as being unwell it will be so much easier to ask for help and to respond to that help. Public opinion will not make MI go away but a positive regard will help us to get well more quickly.
Thank you for your compliments. It's always good to know I have helped in some way. Reading the posts you describe is good for us all I believe. Helping someone has a double benefit, for the helper and the person helped. I had the 'flu during the week and as you probably know, it leaves you feeling exhausted. My GP told me I would have been more unwell if I had not had a 'flu vax. 'Flu gone but I still get tired easily. This is the first time in a week I have answered more than one post and most days none at all. It's 8:30am and I already want to go back to bed. Maybe if I have breakfast it will help.
Good to hear from you and know you are considering meds.
Mary
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