Depression & Brief Psychotic Episode

[strawberry_1]

Hi 🙂

I have been diagnosed with depression, and I had a brief psychotic episode last year. I am still in recovery, taking meds, and attempting to rebuild my life. Has anyone here been through a brief psychotic episode? It's been really tough... I've had to change a lot of things in my life, stopping certain interests like tarot cards, which have contributed to me developing delusions. At the moment I'm struggling to find new interests that are healthy and good for me, since I am quite spiritual and lean towards spiritual interests. Anyone here who's spiritual? I've gotten into Buddhism more and been reading lots of self-development books!

I also have depression, and it's been hard to find any motivation to do things - even the things I usually love doing. My mood is so flat. How do guys cope with that?

Thanks for reading this 🙂

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi strawberry_1,

Welcome to the forums! I'm glad you could join us.

Sorry to hear that you are struggling right now. I haven't been through a psychotic episode but I've had my fair share of depression! If it would help, you can try the Sane forums or having a search on the forums for 'psychosis' to find others that could relate.

I hope that you don't mind me asking, but how do you know what is healthy and what isn't when it comes to preventing your delusions? I can understand how Tarot cards and beliefs can lead to delusional beliefs, but then couldn't this happen with any spiritual belief or task in general? I hope it's okay to ask this - I just want to understand more about your experiences.

I'm really drawn to Buddhism and self-help books as well! I've always loved to read self-help but only learned about Buddhism in the last couple of years; I'd love to hear about what you've been reading or learning about.

It sounds like you're really enthusiastic about these things- does that help motivate you? What are the other things you love to do?
For me I try to balance it out and 'inject' the good so to speak, so if there's things that I liked to enjoy I work to make room for them knowing that they'll help in the long run even if they don't bring me a lot of joy right at that moment. Does that make sense? Kind of like how people force themselves to go for a run even if they don't like running - over time it does help even if the mood feels like it stays constant for a while.

rt

[strawberry_1]

Thank you so much for your response rt, I really appreciate it. 🙂

Thank you so much for that great idea, I will definitely have a look through the forums.

I don't mind you asking at all, that's such a good question and one I've been battling with recently, hence my struggle. All I know when it comes to my delusions is that there are certain things I was addicted to (I have OCD), that perpetuated obsessive and irrational thinking - such as tarot cards, and obsessing about a previous love interest. My psychotic episode was centred around him, so I kind of know which thoughts were not based in reality now. The medications also help me to look back and see how and where my thinking was irrational / delusional, so I have decided to stop those things that made those thoughts grow.

"Couldn't this happen with any spiritual belief or task in general?" That is so true, and that's exactly why I am struggling, because I am spiritual by nature, and because I have a vulnerability for delusions, it's a challenge trying to figure out what the "right" path is for me. At the moment, I feel that Buddhism is perfect because it anchors me in the present moment and in reality - it shows me an objective reality to reflect on, which also helps me cope with challenges in life.

That's awesome!!! What books/ resources/guides have you been using? 😄
I've been reading the following books:
- Think Like a Monk by Jay Shetty
- Awakening the Buddha Within by Lama Surya Das
- The Happiness Trap by Dr Russ Harris

I also LOVE Thich Nhat Hanh's books, such as The Art of Living. You could also check out his quotes 🙂
Pema Chodron is also great! 🙂

Yes, that's amazing, it does help motivate me. I think the things that motivate me are self-help and spirituality, and forging deep connections with people. Thank you. I also love to paint, so I started a watercolour class online and I'm thinking of beginning a certificate course in visual arts this year as I'm on a gap year from my studies. Perhaps those things will help. I think my studies have contributed to a lot of stress, so I'm still managing my anxiety and stress in relation to that.

Wow, yes, that totally makes sense. Thank you. I have been trying that out actually, and you're right, it does help in the long-run. I try to schedule in a work-out/run/yoga and reading a book everyday. It's hard when those things don't bring you the usual joy, but you're right, I should keep doing it regardless.

Thank you so much once again 🙂

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi strawberry_1,

It's lovely to hear back from you! 🙂

Thank you for clarifying this and helping me to understand and sharing your experiences. I'm thinking it must be really hard to give up the tarot cards? Especially if you're spiritual in nature I'm kind of imagining it must be really taking something away from you you felt so connected with? Buddhism and anchoring makes so much sense, but at the same time I've also heard people with delusions thinking that they are Buddha too.. It's tough.

I appreciate your recommendations! I've read the Happiness Trap, Pema Chrodron (When things fall apart) and a few of Thich Nhat Hanh's books. I'm actually terrible with recommendations because I read so many and forget the titles of the good ones! I think my favourite spiritual one has to be Thich Nhat Hanh's At home in the world - have you read that one? He's so wise haha.

Currently I'm reading the The Three Christs of Ypsilanti which is about a very old psychiatric experiment, so not spiritual or helpful in anyway whatsoever. Have you ever gotten into Buddhist practices like meditations or mindfulness?

Painting and watercolour sounds lovely and very therapeutic! I'd like to think that the certificate would be a little less demanding and stressful than other courses. I really like your plan.

Oh I'm so glad! It can be so hard but I do believe it helps over time. What book are you reading at the moment?

You're so welcome. It's so lovely to chat with you and I hope you're doing okay today 🙂

rt