Medication change and hospital

[Stormgrl101]

hi

Today my psychiatrist was discussing going into hospital or a respite care place while I will be going through a medication change. Just wondering if anyone has experiences to share or if they have been through something like this and could tell me what it was like for them. I have never been in hospital for anything before and not sure how to feel. I'm scared I will miss my pet bunny and boyfriend too much. 

[Zeal]

Hi Storm girl,

I made plans to go into hospital with my psychiatrist too, over three years ago now. I was there for two months. I was taking antidepressants (SSRI's) before I went in, and increased my dose while I was in there. The nurses are careful with medication, and always follow your doctor's advice regarding how to gradually increase a dose with minimal concerns. Going into hospital for (at the time, I thought only two weeks) was a new experience for me. It was my first time to ever be admitted to hospital (I was 19). I had an atypical eating disorder, and was of a dangerously low body weight.

I was mainly going to miss my family's presence, my cat, and my bedroom. Even though the eating disorder patients had strict controls (such as not leaving the ward during the 2 or 6 week program), we were allowed daily visitors. For me, this was usually my Mum, and sometimes my Dad, sister, Grandparents, or my best friend. I remember two of the girls I was close to had their boyfriends visit. After a mealtime, all eating disorder patients were required to stay in the lounge room next door for an hour, and often enough their boyfriends would come and keep them company during this time.

Once when I was in hospital, the staff gave us a pet day. I decided not to get Mum to bring in my cat, as I thought he would feel a bit uncomfortable with the change of scenery! One of the girls brought in her guinea pig, and another brought her cat. This was only for half the day, but was still a pretty nice thing to have in hospital.

I hope you can take comfort in something I've said. I stayed in the mental health ward at a public hospital, with a variety of patients. There were a small number of eating disorder beds provided. There were gambling patients, and those with depression and/or anxiety. I was surprised by how lovely the majority of patients were. Some were really unhappy and kept to themselves, which is completely understandable. The six of us eating disorder patients became friends, and were a source of support for each other. I met a woman who had a son my age. She was hospitalised for compulsively shopping.

I hope your hospital stay or time in the respite care centre is as pleasant as possible.

Best wishes,

SM

[Stormgrl101]

Thanku SM for sharing your experience with me. I appreciate it.

So now its just a waiting game til a hospital bed comes up for me. Plus now I am not on any medication. Im also upset that my outer shell has finally cracked and my parents finally know how bad I am struggling. I cry because Ive let my family down. I cry because each day, hour, minute is such a struggle and theres nothing I or anyone else can do about it. 

[Zeal]

Hi Stormgirl,

You're more than welcome 🙂

Waiting can be frustrating - hopefully it won't take too much longer. If you're really struggling without your meds, see your doctor again and ask for advice. It sounds like you live at home? Living with family can be a real help when you're going through a tough time. It's actually good that your parents are aware that you're struggling and can see that you're hurting. Now they know, maybe that will help them understand on a different level. You haven't let your family down. Mental illness is not something you choose or can hide. It is a condition which affects you, and in a different way, your family. This is just the way it is.

My parents were very worried and upset when I was really ill, but nothing could stop that from happening. I needed time to get better, and they will always worry about me if I'm not happy or healthy. This applies to many families who are touched by mental illness, including yours I imagine. You are definitely not to blame, and deserve to get the help you need. The reward for you and your parents at the end of this battle with mental illness will be seeing improvements, and seeing you more well and happy.

If you're feeling really upset, try talking to your parents or your boyfriend. It can sometimes feel as though you should be alone to compose yourself and calm down. This is tough. Don't be afraid to depend on your family and boyfriend at least a little for emotional support. If you thank them and are appreciative, they should be willing to support you. Then when you are better in the future, you can be there for them if they are having a rough time.

Best wishes,

SM

[Stormgrl101]

Thankyou again SM.

I just wanted to update. I'm still in hospital but feeling so much better. Its been a long 4 weeks or so but finally seem to have found the right medication. Going to hospital was definitely the best thing for me. Being extremely shy and anxious it was very hard for me to open up and talk but I feel very relieved that by taking baby steps things are starting to look up. I know this is only the start of my journey to recovery and there will probably be setbacks involved but the black dog of depression seems to have gone away for now and I am left with dealing with my anxiety. The nurses have all been so lovely and I can really appreciate the work they do. 

[Zeal]

Hi again Storm girl,

I'm so glad you're now taking medication that works well for you, and have mustered the courage to open up to people. It's great that you have worked through your depression, and are committed to slowly making headway with your anxiety symptoms. I had some awesome nurses when I was in hospital several years ago. It really makes all the difference! I know what it's like to be in hospital for over a month due to problematic mental health. It is worth doing for your personal wellbeing. Hopefully the rest of your stay goes smoothly 🙂

Best wishes, and have a great Christmas and New Year!

SM

[Airies]

That's great news Storm girl. I've spent a good deal of the past 4 months in hospital and been out for 3 weeks. The right medication kicks in and you're right the majority of the nurses are understanding. Have a very merry Xmas and all the best in the new year:)