Having to change Psychologists..

20oney · ‎21-05-2018

Hey all,

So I've recently moved to a new state and consequently have had to leave my former psych behind me. I've spent the last month or two really avoiding the idea of picking a new psych and starting sessions. But, I managed to find one and had my first session last weekend. The session went fine, it was just the 'get to know you' kind of deal. So it wasn't too stressful. It's somewhat refreshing starting out with someone new after 2 years, but also daunting and annoying having to start over..

I guess I am regretting actually making the decision to find a psych and start again. I say this because I really struggle between sessions. The conversations had and the potential conversations to be, really just fester in my mind - over and over.. My new work schedule will allow fortnightly sessions which is not ideal. But asking for weekly sessions would also not be ideal as I don't want to gain a dependence on this process (though it seems I already have this...).

I'm not normally great at being open and sharing the things that go through my mind. With my previous psych, we relied a great deal on email contact which was helpful but I don't think I want email contact with this psych as I would like to address issues without this 'aid'... I'm not sure how well this idea will go. I've been thinking about writing things down to take with me, but that is an incredibly uncomfortable thought for me. I'm not really sure what to do, or what my question here is. All I know, is that I am in quite a deep pit at the moment and I feel like it's going to take a few sessions before we really gain that rapport and I am able to start expressing myself..

For those who have had to start fresh with a new psychologist, do you have tips for me? Do you take it as it comes, or jump right in...?

Cheers in advance,

A

Guest8901 · ‎21-05-2018

Hi 20oney's

I sympathise with your situation. I've only started seeing a clinical psychologist this year and so have not had to go through the process of needing to change. I'm very lucky in that the one I have now has a very good reputation, is a good fit for me and also is happy to correspond via email or telephone if I ever need to.

There is another thread here which you may find useful. It is about seeing a new psychologist and has a lot of helpful information on it. You may find it beneficial to read through it. There are quite a lot of replies there, although it hasnt been used in a while now.

I dont know if I have managed to give you the correct address to google here. But if that doesnt work, go to the PTSD and Trauma section and look for a thread with the title "New Psychologist". Although its located in the PTSD section, it applies equally to any other MH issues as well.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/ptsd-trauma/new-psychologist

I hope it all works out well for you.

Amanda

romantic_thi3f · ‎23-05-2018

Hi 20oney / A,

Thanks for your post. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with this and hopefully can offer some support.

So it sounds like from reading your post, perhaps its the idea of being dependent on your new psychologist and having all those thoughts fester in between appointments that puts you off seeing someone again. Have I got that right?

This post was very timely for me as I've recently had to find a new psychologist. Having seen my old one for several years it's been quite a flip to think about starting a new relationship. I battled with the idea of what to say, whether to jump right in or take things slow, whether to trust her or open up slowly - I don't think there's any right answer to that. The first psychologist I saw after I didn't quite click with, but I tried again and this time - it felt much more at ease. It can be really uncomfortable 'starting again' when you've already opened up with someone before.

Can you maybe have a think about what you're looking for with this new psychologist? Do you have something in mind you'd like to work on? It's totally okay if you want to bring something in writing - whatever makes you feel more comfortable.

The last thing that I wanted to say was this - I don't think it's about 'starting again' even though you're starting therapy again. Yes, the same stuff might come up that you've been struggling with, but you also probably have a different perspective on it; having both seen a psychologist already as well as having that time on your own reflecting. Plus, no two psychologists are the same so it's very likely one psychologist will take the conversation one way and another the other way.

Hope this answers your questions!

Doolhof · ‎23-05-2018

Hi 20oney,

I'd like to encourage you to write things down between your appointments. It helps me to do that and when I don't those, crazy thoughts just keep going around in my head.

If there is something I want to discuss with the psychologist I put a * next to what I have written, underline it or circle it, write in bold letters or what ever.

Looking at what I feel I want to discuss a day or so before the appointment helps. I might have decided by then that an issue I had last week is no longer an issue.

One day I took in a couple of drawings to show the psychologist and he helped me work through my emotions and thoughts that way.

Each appointment can be so different from previous appointments and that is okay too.

Reading some self help books in between appointments helps me sometimes as well.

All the best, cheers from Dools

20oney · ‎23-05-2018

Hey romantic_thi3f, thanks for the reply!

Yeah, so I spent a couple of months without seeing my previous psych and while I was able to keep them updated with the occasional message, I didn't have the constant thoughts running through my mind of having the conversations or even being in the 'safe' environment. It just feels like the second I started this process again, I've gained this instant dependence or longing to be heard and understood I guess..

I think you're right in that there's no single answer for how it should go and I am sure it will proceed as it needs to. Whether that involves me being my normal therapy self and shutting down when I enter the room, or taking a new stance of openness.. How long did it take for you to really know that you didn't click with the first psych?

You're totally right that this is not starting again. A lot has changed, I'm in a different position, location, situation. It's just building up that relationship, discovering new boundaries and such.

Again, thank you for the reply!

romantic_thi3f · ‎28-05-2018

Hi 20oney!

Thanks for your post and great to hear from you again!

Yeah that makes complete sense, I understand that.

That is a great question! I thought a lot about the appointment afterwards; what it is I wanted and how the session went and decided not to book in again. When I saw her, I talked about how I'd had to suddenly stop seeing the psychologist - so it was a bit of a break-up as well as hesitancy about starting again. I ended up asking a lot of questions about her approach and therapies. One of the things she said was that she can be a bit frank and outspoken, and she came across that way in the first session. I was so glad that she owned that but later I realised I needed someone with a more gentle approach.

I hope this answers your question! I'd be really interested to know what your new psych is like!