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Got a question related to mental health? ASK DR KIM

Chris_B
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi everyone,

This is a thread for asking questions of our resident GP and counsellor, Dr Kim, who pops into the forums regularly.

PLEASE NOTE as per our community rules, Dr Kim won't be able to answer questions about medications, these are best discussed offline directly with your mental health professional.

UPDATE - 01/03/2018
BEFORE YOU ASK DR.KIM PLEASE CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING POINTS:

  • Dr Kim's time is limited! We cannot provide an ongoing dialogue with Dr Kim in this thread - one post/question per person please
  •  We'd recommend you have a look through the forums before posting here to see if your question has already been answered by Dr Kim, our other members, or if there's information about it already on the beyondblue website. If a question pops up that has already been answered previously, or if alternate resources are available, one of our moderators will reply and direct you to the link.
  • When writing your question, imagine you are speaking to someone in person i.e. provide a clear and detailed post with enough information that outlines how Dr.Kim can help you.

Background

After 20 years of experience working as a GP, Dr Kim realised in 2003 the aspect of her work she enjoyed most was talking to people and understanding the way they think and behave – and so she underwent training in counselling and therapy, where she now solely works.

Her experience includes working with a wide range of mental health issues including anxiety, depression and adolescent mental health.

“Given my training I also see couples, siblings, parents with their children and entire family groups,” she says. “In this work I hope to give families the skills to understand one another and have the strategies to communicate and manage relationships that are distressing them. I believe strongly that best therapy is achieved when there is trust in the therapist's ability but also their genuine desire to understand and help.”

550 Replies 550

willrad
Community Member

Hello Dr Kim,

I am 21 years old 76kg and 177cm tall and quite healthy. I have had anxiety for years now and it has recently gotten worse so i thought i would just list the issues im having. Firstly my anxiety is almost always related to how i feel physically, i have had a heart ablation for SVT and since then i have been very aware of my heart beat and anything abnormal (to me) makes me anxious and panic. I have had multiple tests since then and a halter monitor for 24 hours and everything is fine but still whenever I have a skip beat or chest pain i panic and this is happening daily now and affecting my work. Secondly I also cannot exercise due to the feeling of a racing heart even though i know its normal I always have a panic attack after exercise and now i have no motivation even though i really enjoy sports. Exercise feels like a panic attack. Thirdly I have also been getting anxiety from certain foods like if i eat a food i dont often eat such as spicy food or mushrooms i get anxiety from thinking im allergic for some reason!? And then this can lead to a panic attack it just feels like anything that happens to me gives me a panic attack. It is mainly related to heart and chest pain but even if i have sore back or leg my brain will find a way to link the pain to a heart attack. I just want 1000 tests and an MRI to give me closure that i am fine even though i know im fine. Even if i get tests i feel like the doctors missed something and ughh it just sucks. I was on meds but don't want to rely on meds forever but also dont want to feel like this? thanks and sorry for the grammar i wrote this after a panic attack.

Dr_Kim
Community Member
willrad said:

Hello Dr Kim,

I am 21 years old 76kg and 177cm tall and quite healthy. I have had anxiety for years now and it has recently gotten worse so i thought i would just list the issues im having.

Hi Willrad
What you are experiencing is really common for panic disorder.
The thing is, your mind has a really great way to try and protect you from danger .. it has a “radar” for danger and if it senses something is not ok it puts your body into a state where it is ready to get the hell away from the dangerous thing.
The problem with anxiety and panic is that your mind is tricking you and has hijacked what could be a really helpful response if you were say, faced with a predator in a jungle, and applying it in all sorts of strange situations .

So we have to get tricky back. This is where we start to
1. try to practice more mindfulness by telling your alerted brain that “Oh Oh ! Here we go again , that tricky old panic button is being pushed and we need to try and not take it seriously ( unless there is an ACTUAL lion or tiger in front of you of course!) Knowing the difference between real panic and “false” panic is one of the jobs of mindfulness. In your case , this would mean things like reading what is exercise induced increased heart rate ( therefore”healthy”and good ) and when is panic trying to “trick" you into misjudging it into something nasty.

2. Learn mechanisms to calm yourself down when the panic has set it . In this way we can sort of trick the brain into thinking the predator has passed and we can now just chill out. This is done with slow breathing exercises that turn off the fright and flight hormones and restore the status quo.

I agree that it totally sucks … but I think you really can get help for this as its really common and very treatable.

I suggest you ask your GP for a referral to psychologist who does CBT for panic and maybe get this book that really good practical advice as a starting point. - Sarah Edelman’s “Change Your Thinking”. Good luck !

danz1300
Community Member

hey. I'm 17 and am in my final year of school. I feel that I am drowning. I go to school with a boy who sexually assaulted me, there's nothing I can do about it. my friends are still friends with him and my best friend is still dating him (even though they know what he did to me. I hate having to be around him. I don't want to be around him, I don't want to spend a three-day camp with him and the school also put our lockers together.

I feel so trapped and so alone.

What should I do?

Dr_Kim
Community Member

Hi danz1300,

So im going to be pretty direct wth my advice here because I feel this is a really important issue that needs to be handled well. I think you clearly cannot rely on your peers to manage things. I would “step this up” to the next level.

You need a responsible adult to help you as sexual assault is not to be ignored.
Please tell a trusted family member, a school counsellor, a teacher, your GP, a Headspace centre, a psychologist… anyone who can help you to unravel the maze of feelings and responses that occur around a sexual assault . There may need to be actions taken but again, its hard to know without advice from the proper authorities.

You may also find it helpful to call a helpline like
https://www.1800respect.org.au/violence-and-abuse/sexual-assault-and-violence/
or https://www.casa.org.au/

Basically, my advice is not to ignore your feelings. If you feel like you are drowning in a sea of emotion , that is totally understandable. Please please put your hand up and get the RIGHT people to help you.

jpau79
Community Member

i need help

So this time last year, i was in a dark place, depression. suicidal, and very low self esteem. I have been seperated now from my ex girlfriend of 16 years, sadly, when we moved to Perth, she signed Centrelink papers as she was sole carer of our 4 kids, but she lives in Brisbane, Ive told her many times to let Centrelink know that her and I have split, but with all the lies shes told to them, she still recieves FTB, now, I have been dying to move out from her family now since we split, i been job hunting, even gone to the point of trying to apply for some assistance for housing n stuff for myself and my kids. Now, I want to go NZ, and work again, but I wanna take my kids with me, not gonna happen the ex and her parents said I have to visit, but i cannot take them. I want to take them with me, because the brother in law is a druggie and has bipolar, and Ive never trusted him with my kids, as theyve never felt safe. Applied for so many jobs 177 to be exact, can never get accepted. I just want to know, how do I part ways already with my kids, the only other option is that I move out n stay in Perth, but live on assistance with Centrelink whatever they can help me with, The emotional stress and depression I feel every day I live under my ex partners parents hoe, feels restricting, and never fair on my kids and I. What are the steps and services I can take to make this happen.

E_Paddington
Community Member

Hi Dr Kim,

I have diagnosed anxiety and depression which I have been dealing with for a number of years. I have noticed that it often manifests in spaces/environments such as work meetings, classrooms etc. and as a result of my anxiety I feel significant physical effects such as nausea, feeling faint, tingling in the body and extremities, and issues with my stomach. This often results in very loud noises coming from my abdomen which is very embarrassing and causes further anxiety. Is there anything that I can do (both mentally in terms of anxiety reducing techniques, and physically through food/drink etc.) to reduce or stop this from happening? It seems like such a trivial and silly thing but it has an enormous effect on me!

Thanks Dr Kim

Huyana-Raine
Community Member

Hi Dr Kim

I suffer from Complex PTSD, co-dependency, anxiety & depression; the symptoms of which have been exacerbated by a recent break up. I become easily dysregulated & I disassociate & isolate myself a lot.. plus I suffer debilitating mood swings & rage attacks. I have tried talk therapy, but it just seems to make me worse. I have also tried a bunch of different medications, but have not found one that helps & they also give me horrific side effects. I have been encouraged to join "support groups", but I have been unable to locate any. Could you recommend anyone that I could see that is skilled in treating patients with C-PTSD or any support groups that incorporate any form of post traumatic stress, anxiety & depression? I live on the southside of Brisbane, so joining something in the local area would work best for me, since I am a single parent & can't travel far.

startingnew
Community Member

Hi Dr Kim it was suggested by a CC that i ask for abit of advice from you so here goes...

i was diagnosed with C-Ptsd, BPD, anxiety/depression.

My Gp and Psychiatrist are saying that i have no other options left esp the medicinal field as well as there support. . last yr i was on an SSRI med for a while but maxed out with no change in myself and it made me really sick physically so i went off them. i tried one medication but had an allergic reaction to it so was only on it for 3 days. Went on another medication and had to go on a high dose to see any effects and it was working well however the weight gain associated with this medication was becoming detrimental to my health (gained over 20kg in as little as 6 months) so was agreed i needed to come off it. im off them 3 days now.

im currently on a low dose mood stabliser it doesnt seem to be doing a great deal right now.

my mh has really deteriorated after stopping those meds that were helping and i asked my gp and psychiatrist about other options but they said i dont have any left at all beside dealing with it on my own and speaking to my psychologist (been seeing one for a yr and only starting to pick up when i went on those meds) my gp and psychiatrist seemed to have put me in the too hard basket and dont think its neccessary to see them unless really neccessary- so all my supports have dropped.

and sleep- i barely sleep at all- i get to the point in the night where trying to sleep actually distreses me because i cant get to sleep. i am getting 3 hrs if im lucky per night and its broken sleep. i spoke to my gp/psych about that too and gp gave me one med to try but it gave me strange dreams and didnt help all that much with sleep anyway. i was also told i am only allowed to have it max 2 nights a week as its addictive and not allowed to have it any more than 3 months before having to go off it anyway. that is in the benzodiazepine category.

i am forever feeling the need to move during the night so am often cleaning and physically doing something. blood work they say is all fine, i have a good sleep routine, and tried natural alternatives, essential oils salt lamps, anything that might help with none helping yet im laying a wake all hrs of the night even without no thoughts (trauma past).

So according to offline help i am out of options and no one can help me, i feel very stuck, hopeless and worried (esp with mh drop) - do you have any other ideas please?

Sheba123
Community Member
Hi, my 21 year old son has diagnosed depression. He has had this since high school, and came out as being gay a couple of years ago, which was no problem and we are supportive. He refuses to take medication or seek help. He locks himself in his bedroom for up to 20 hours a day. Reduced appetite, rarely social, not working etc. He lies, avoids us and I’m struggling to know what to do. I spoke to a psychologist and they said the most important thing was to get him to the doctor and on medication, but he refuses.

Dr_Kim
Community Member
Hi Jpau79

Your situation seems so incredible tough and I can see that you must feel very caught and stuck. Your situation with your kids and parents in law is so difficult. I can see why you might need a calm clear head to sort things out.
So maybe that is where you start from. From a calm clear head. I wonder if its the FIRST step you take up and over the mountain of your problems.

So to do that i would get to a GP or a Community Mental Health Service and ask for help in that goal. State that you want help with managing stress. Techniques for calming and breathing and slowing your emotions so you can think clearly and be less likely to make mistakes. More likely to make decisions you are happy with in the long run.

It may mean that you spend 8 weeks doing a relaxation / mindfulness/ calming course … which might sound like a strange place to start given you have ALL these things that need to be sorted out. However, my feeling is that you have a BETTER chance of sorting them out if you approach when you are less depressed and less stressed. When you can find the skills to let go of the irritations and disappointments that aren’t essential to manage immediately so you can concentrate on the bigger problems that really do need attention.

I know its a huge ask. I know it sounds like a long way around to getting things together… but in my experience, people are better to slow the process down, take their time, make less mistakes, and in the long run , they will be happier with the outcome.

So ..Jpau79…please make that appointment with your GP.. and make it a LONG appointment so you can explain and get the help. Even take this post in with you so the GP understands the rationale for the request you are making.