Can TCAs make you feel worse

Rosie49 · ‎08-03-2014

I have been on a low dose tricylclic AD for 16 days. My partner died suddenly 14 weeks ago. I know I am grieving, but 3 weeks ago I was in a dark place. Not sleeping, having panic attacks, hyperventilating and could not stop sobbing and went to my GP for the first time since my partner died (also my partners GP). He prescribed a low dose tricyclic AD. The first 10 or so days were ok. The panic subsided and my mood lifted a bit so that I was able to function. But the last few days my mood has slipped, and I'm finding it hard to fight back the tears, and worse when I'm out of the house. And some nights I don't sleep. I'm wondering if the ADs are not working for me, or should I give them a bit more time. I don't want to mask my grief, but I don't want to go back to how I was 3 weeks ago. If I go back to a doctor, it will be to one recommended here - one of them is close by. I was disappointfed with my GP. When I told him I was struggling with my partner's sudden death, he said to me, "still?" , like I should be moving on after 3 months, with my partner of 20 years gone in the blink of an eye and was unable to say goodbye to him. I think too I am getting myself worked up, as I have tentatively agreed to scatter his ashes in a week's time. I am feeling that it is going to be like his funeral all over again.

JessF · ‎12-03-2014

Hello Rosie, I am so so sorry to hear about the loss of your partner. I can't believe your GP would be so insensitive. Of course you will still be grieving after 3 months. Who do you have around to support you at the moment? With scattering the ashes this will be a very difficult time, I imagine it will be like the funeral and will bring up a lot of emotions. You shouldn't have to do this on your own.

Grief is a normal human emotion but it doesn't mean that it is easy or that it should be dismissed. have you considered some counselling from a psychologist to help you through at the moment?

At the very least I think that changing GPs and getting a second opinion on your medication would be a good idea. The first psychiatrist I saw put me on a tricyclic AD (I nearly wrote tricycle there...wouldn't that be interesting?). It didn't work well for me and when I changed to a different psychiatrists he was amazed that I had been put on them because they are apparently very old drugs and there are much better ones available now. Anyhow hope you can come back to us soon.

Rosie49 · ‎12-03-2014

Thank you JessF for responding to my post. My mood has lifted a bit in the last 2 days since chatting to my partners sister. I had worked myself up so much about his ashes and told her so. She understands it is too soon for me, and that it will be my decision as to when and where. Grief does strange things to your brain. You think that no-one cares and that no-one else is struggling, when it is not the case. It has been a double whammy, as his dad also died (the day before my partners funeral). I do have the support of my sister, his sister, and a couple of close friens. Yes my GP was insensitive! I think over the years, I have given him the impression that I cope well under stress, which I don't! You know, the "stiff upper lip" facade! I will give these TCAs a few more days. They have definitely eased my anxiety and I am starting to sleep better again. And a close friend can putme in touch with recommended counsellors when I'm ready. It's my partner's birthday next week too. He would have been 55, so that's a hurdle I have to get over. Thanks for listening JessF. xx

JessF · ‎12-03-2014

55 is very young Rosie. I think sometimes that GPs aren't savvy enough to pick up on our emotional cues when they only see us for 15 minutes at a time but that's still no excuse for his reaction. Anyone with a functioning heart would know that 3 months is no time at all in terms of grief, plus losing your partner's father too, what a time you've had. I'm glad you've got some good family and friends around you and that the pills are helping too.

Rosie49 · ‎23-03-2014

Thought I'd come back here and let you know my tricyclic AD is finally working for me after 4 weeks and most of the side effects have subsided. The low dose has not masked my grief. I didn't want that to happen anyway. I still have really bad days, but on my okay days I function better and can attend to tasks which, a month ago, were impossible for me and I got through my partners birthday better than I thought I would. My progress is slow but I am getting there at my own pace. I have regained some appetite and no longer have to force-feed myself. Thanks for listening, and thanks for your past support. xx