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Support People

Community Member

Hi.  I have 2 amazing ladies who I work with that have offered to be support people for me.  They are there for me when I need to chat, when I am feeling down, or just when I need to know that someone is there and just to hang with.   They have been there for me at my lowest points and shared in the positives.  I could not have got to this point without them.  Only problem is I feel like I am being a burden and I hate that.  They say that I am not a burden and I have every faith in them, but I am forcing myself to try and not contact them as often just so that I don't feel like a burden.  Problem is with severe levels of depression, anxiety and stress at the moment I am putting extra pressure on myself that maybe I don't need to.  I just don't know how to make the most of the support without feeling like I am abusing their support.  

2 Replies 2

Community Member

Hi K_Ley

Reading your post it seems that the 2 ladies who have offered to be your support weren't forced into their offer, they offered because they cared and wanted to make a difference. It can be normal to feel like your a burden to them because its rare in life to get offers of real help when you need them. Obviously they care about you or they wouldn't have offered. Just think if the tables were turned would you help someone if you could,?

Maybe you need to talk about all this stress and anxiety, sometimes talking is a good way to relieve some of it. 

I know exactly what you mean about feeling like your abusing that level of support. Just remember they didn't have to offer you that support so take it as a compliment to the person you obviously put across to them.

Its not being a burden or abusing their support if its offered and I'm sure they would let you know if it became to much.

Without knowing more its hard to talk to you about stress, anxiety and depression but I think that your putting more of those onto yourself than you need to over the offers of help from these ladies.

Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi K_Ley


While they're in the process of supporting you, do you think you could look to them to also give you skills/tools/strategies? Maybe this is something they've already been doing in one way or another. For example, while serious anxiety takes hold sometimes it can be hard for us to strategically breathe on our own. Having someone sit beside us, helping us breathe through our thoughts and feelings, is like sharing in a breathing meditation while both doing the breath work together. The question could become 'Can they help me develop through a shared breathing meditation, to the point where I can eventually master this on my own'. Of course, there will always be next level stressors in life, based on this being the nature of life at times. Next level stressors might require a different practice or an added practice/skill.


I've found that within periods of depression, I just can't see the way forward at times. It's like a blank dark screen in my mind, which definitely doesn't help with depression. Wondering whether your support workers can possibly lead you in some way to be able to practice seeing differently, teaching you through the imagination, for example. If this is something that works for them at times, are they able to show you how they do it? Could you possibly learn this skill from them in some way to the point where it makes some difference on occasion?


If you began to see your support workers as your teachers or guides, do you think that may make a difference? Perhaps instead of 'I feel like I'm a burden' it could become 'I'm looking forward to more teachings and guidance. I'm looking forward to learning some thing new from them or practicing with them what I've learned so far'. Could it become a matter of 'I will practice with them 3 times a week' instead of 'I feel terrible contacting them 3 times in one week'. Of course, there may be a need for the occasional emergency practice session or a session to simply vent how you're feeling.