Help for my PTSD partner

[eljaycee]

I was helped by geoff last year during a hard time....that hard time has returned but I'm trying to manage.

I have dropped in to the forums at various times just to read posts and the kindness that people show here.  It helps when I feel lonely....

My person who I've seen for 18 months or so now,  has complex PTSD and goes through periods of isolation.  There seems to be more anger behind it this time which is why he says he doesn't contact me because he doesn't want to lash out at me.  The lack of contact is stressful for me and I miss him and worry about him.  He has told me is getting treatment, so I just have to trust him to contact me when he's ready.

I just wanted to touch base with understanding people.

[eljaycee]

Hi Neil....sorry to confuse you.  I meant that I posted here last September when I felt hopeless about the relationship, about not hearing from him....but as soon as I had posted I received a text message from him.  The same thing has happened this time.  It seems when I have felt upset enough to post a "please help" on Beyond Blue forums, it just happens to coincide with him making positive contact at last.

I know that by staying in this relationship I am leaving myself open to more hard times and feelings of disappointment, but he's very special to me and we just seem to click.  I am hoping that by staying I am proving to him that he can trust me to stick around even during the darkest times.  That I won't abandon him.

I also understand that it can seem to be a very one sided relationship to outsiders....that it seems his needs get the attention while I'm left on the sidelines.  But, I am aware of that....and I accept it.  I know that when his thinking is clearer that he is there for me.  If anything, this relationship has taught me to not be so reliant on a partner....to be independent.  I was married when I was very young and became very reliant on my now ex husband.  Being with my boyfriend has taught me to stand on my own, that I need to still be me even if I love someone else. If he hadn't had PTSD, we may have moved in together quickly and I would have been back to being dependent on him like I was in my marriage. So that's a positive.....

Thank you for your kindness....I will stay in touch 🙂