Drinking too much alcohol due to partners high stress levels

[Aniuok]

My wife finds everything difficult and stressful, possible early onset Alzheimer’s. I am coping partly by drinking too much because of the constant nature of this stress on me. I use music to relax, enjoyment of nature etc but I need more coping skills

[geoff]

Hello Aniuok, sorry I missed your thread but I'm just putting your thread back on page 1 and will reply back to you.

Geoff.

[geoff]

Hello Aniuok, welcome to the forums and sorry your thread has been missed, this can happen when the site is busy, I apologise.

I am deeply sorry to know that your wife may be suffering from early Alzheimer’s, an insidious illness that most of us fear and understand how you are trying to cope with, which must be all of a sudden devastating.

Can I suggest you look at this in your search browser 'support for my wife with Alzheimer's in Australia', this will then enable you to learn more about this illness and then you'll know what you are allowed to learn more about coping skills as another phase in your marriage has arrived, unfortunately?

I have only known a few people suffering from Alzheimer's and understand how complex it made any communication between two people to be exhausting, so can I advise you to speak with your doctor, this may have already happened because you definitely need ways you can enjoy your time.

I do know that respite for her will give you time to enjoy nature, with the possibility of joining a club that does daily excursions, this may give you the time to do what you have always wanted to do.

Hope to hear back from you.

Geoff.

[Aniuok]

Thanks, unfortunately I know a lot about dementia with caring for a family member in our home for some years. So I’m pretty much up with what will happen.

I think raising my issue here and recently talking to close friends is making it possible for me to cope better. Talking about an issue is the start of managing it I think. Our GP is aware of the situation and has tried referral to specialist but that has been resisted.

[james1]

Hello Aniuok,

I'm really sorry to hear about your wife's possible early onset Alzheimer's. I do not know anyone with Alzheimer's, but I have a close friend's father who has Parkinson's and it has been terrible to see his decline over the years. Different diseases of course, but it's really hard to watch either and know what is coming.

I'm glad you've managed to speak to geoff here and to your close friends recently - I hope you are able to keep this up as it can really help as you've found. It becomes even more valuable later on, to already have people who know what is going on when things are tough.

You mentioned the specialist referral was resisted - was that by your wife who was not keen? I'm sure, between the two of you, you'll find some way to manage this over time.

Let us know how you go.

James

[geoff]

Hello Aniuok, it's great you are in tune about what happens with dementia, unfortunately, we never really know what happens unless we are put in that position where we have to cope ourselves, reading a book can certainly help, but in real life, there are many different circumstances that actually happen we weren't prepared for.

Talking with other people who have encountered a situation like this is definitely your best option, but the situation may change every day or every time a different routine begins to happen such as instead of bathing them, ask them to have a shower, that can become complicated for them to understand.

Asking them to visit a specialist may be more problematical than you thought, only because they believe there is no reason why they need to see one, or even asking them to cross the kitchen floor that is shiny, they refuse only thinking it's slippery.

Good to hear back from you.

Geoff.