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Depressed husband suddenly happy again
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I have been married for nearly 15 years and most of this time my husband has suffered with depression to varying degrees. He has had medication on a few occasions but never any further treatment. This week he has announced that he suddenly feels better - like a weight has been lifted. He says he hasn't felt this good since he was a child. He only now realises that when I had said to him before that he wasn't happy in himself that I was right. He now feels happy and content - and I'm nervous! Don't get me wrong, I'm delighted that he's feeling so good but is this normal? Should I be concerned about this sudden change in mood and attitude? After years of distance and lack of connection or good communication, he says he feels like we're dating again. He also says his sleeping pattern has changed from where he could never remember dreams to having vivid dreams that he remembers in detail.
I would really appreciate an opinion as to others experience of coming out of depression and if I should be concerned or just happy! Thanks
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Wow! That's awesome - I have to say I'm a little jealous! I wish I could flip a switch and suddenly be better too!!
Has he recently started a new med perhaps? Could he have done this without you knowing? Has he changed any lifestyle factors - diet, exercise, supplements, spiritual matters, work...?
Whatever the reason, I think just be happy that things have turned around for the better. Be on the lookout though for manic type behaviour - that might look like excessive amounts of energy, making impulsive/irrational decisions, rushing out and spending lots of money on stuff he wouldn't normally buy, making grandiose plans and so on. These could be signs of bipolar disorder, in which case he would need to see his GP ASAP and begin treatment with mood stabilisers at least.
But if he has just overcome his depression then fantastic - enjoy every good day that you have. Who knows if it's for good or if there's some cycle happening; take each day as it comes. Unless he has become bipolar then I think any change for the better is only good.
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Thank you for your response. It is unlikely that he is taking any meds without discussing it with me - he would be fairly disinclined to take them at all. Things normally have to get pretty bad before he'll go in that direction. I'd be surprised if he is bipolar, he's never been manic in all the time I've known him but I'll keep an eye for the signs you've mentioned. I don't mean to rain on his parade, it's been very difficult at times coping with the depression over the years and I do hope he's turned a corner. Fingers crossed
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Hi syvio,
Welcome to the forums. I'm glad that BeeGee has replied to you already. I'm also glad that you came here to get some advice.
I think for starters, it's only natural for you to feel a bit nervous about this sudden change in your husband. Have you actually spoken with him about it? What does he attribute it to?
Sometimes things can just begin to feel stable instead of being in decline, and this can change one's mood to feeling rather content. Perhaps he also feels like he's ready to start re-engaging in things, as you mentioned he feels like you are dating again.
I think as BeeGee has said, enjoy this time and take each day as it comes, but also be encouraging of his new feeling and behaviour. It can sometimes be this encouragement that continues the momentum of feeling happy.
Throughout the time that the two of you have been together have you ever sought support for yourself as a carer? Being a carer can be a pretty demanding role. While your husband is feeling well it could be a good chance for you to focus on you a bit more. Perhaps do some of those things that you always put off when your husband wasn't well.
I do hope the joy continues for both of your benefit:)
AGrace
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dear Syvio, well this is a great post after all those years of being in depression and now it has lifted.
How can I explain this euphoria, but then how can you explain depression.
It's certainly a feeling of great relief like the top of the world has opened up when it happened for me, and the only person I could tell was my psychologist, as I was living alone, because all those problems which plagued me, I knew that I couldn't understand or find a way to resolve them so I sealed them all up with a label 'never to be opened' and sent them adrift.
The AD's I was taking then really kicked in and at last felt the real benefits from taking them, and yes my world had changed, so I know how your husband feels and this follows on to you.
Is it possible to keep in touch with us. L Geoff. x
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