Good to meet you Marcsa,
I'm sorry you have go through so much heartbreak. I hope your son will benefit from his hospital stay. He seems to be in good hands and well looked after.
Supporting loved ones affected by mental illness is no easy job. It takes a heavy toll and can easily lead to burn out. Kudos to you for acknowledging that some things have become unacceptable. You are right, your son is an adult and illness is no excuse for constant lying. But knowing you did all you could do doesn't stop the pain, does it ? Every parent mourns a loss whenever a child leaves home, even more so when it happens in circumstances fraught with concerns and conflict.
But please hold on to hope. People eventually acquire emotional maturity, pennies drop, behaviour can change. My own daughter didn't talk to me for a couple of years (her mental issues were due to brain injury). The relationship was so awful that I was actually relieved when she left home while still being brokenhearted and worried about her future. She couldn't be trusted either. These days, she has learned to manage her ongoing problems and we are good friends.
Grieving for a loss is a process that cannot be forwarded. It must be given time. Do you have family or friends who can offer support and TLC during this difficult transition ?
Please take good care of yourself. Your inner resources must be close to exhausted. Do not hesitate to go for counseling if it all becomes too overwhelming. Being able to talk in depth with someone neutral can make a huge difference.
And then of course, there's the forums where you will always be heard and understood.
We're here for you.
