??? Whats wrong

[Guest_4593]

Feeling nothing, im stepping out my comfort zone, taking risks. Trying to feel something but nothing i dont feel happy, joy no sense of excitement or fear.. just feel alone and sad and cry alot.

I was asked why i self harmed i said i dont know . And i dont really understand why i do. But thinking now hey its something to feel...
I have to wake up every morning and (GET UP) i have responsibilities like everyone and i have to pretend to everyone that im ok . Work cant have me half there id lose my job.. family annoys me to much for me to have them realise im not ok . So its all fake and pretend all day.. i have about 3 people who i can say im not ok 2 ..but this is been going on so long even i wanna leave and ignore myself. Im uncomfortable talking out loud or to professionals im not sure i will get help but i do think ill lose the 3 people i do have very soon . Maybe just need to pretend with them aswell but im drowning suffocating in myself and this sense of emptiness is so overwhelming i just come undone every night when im alone in my room

[Guest_4593]

Never fel

[Aaronsis]

Hey Guest_4593

I just wanted to stop in and see how you are doing today, I can see things have been pretty rough lately and that you had the incident with work and the smelling of alcohol. I am wondering if you wanted to talk about any of the things that could support you through this time with regards to the alcohol and work etc...I know you know all about the support groups and AA and that it is hard for you to reach out for support.

Things seem to be really overwhelming for you and I just wanted to let you know I am here if you need to vent and to chat or even just to talk about nothing much just to keep you occupied and keep your mind busy.

You are supported here Guest_4593 and we care about you.

Hope to chat soon

Sarah

[ecomama]

Hi Guest_4593

How are you doing now?

I used to use alcohol as a way to "escape" what I was feeling or the situation I was in.

I can say after going cold turkey, I can handle so many things better.

Please keep talking to us. Whatever it is that's bothering you, we are here for you.

You know that most of the work will be up to you but it REALLY helps having shoulders to lean on and we're here for you.

Love EM

[smallwolf]

Please know we are here for you. It might not be the same as a chat but if you want to talk we are about and will respond as soon as possible. sometimes just writing what is on your mind here can be helpful.

Peace to you.

Tim

[Guest_4593]

Thanks all of u . Think iv been waiting to hear all my life that someone is here for me... and i think i have been using this sight as a gods ear and a sounding bored... still not healthy choices but its definitely a comfort knowing people are here Listening to me sorry i dont always respond correctly but...... you all make a difference and you have all saved me multiple times so thanks

[Guest_4593]

+ will they ever forgive me. Im not sure i care, but im not completely selfish..will they care about me. Or just therselbes

[Guest_4593]

Hahaha to late for help . I need it all to stop. All of it..... its just to much and so hard and not worth it at the end of the day. I have tried i have... months now and everything just gets smaller and smaller and less and less.. 

[smallwolf]

Sometimes the fewer words used can be an indicator of emotional challenge or pain - that you cannot find a way to express what you are feeling. There are some people in my life that i have trouble opening up to yet it is easy fro me with my psychologist - I can start anywhere, go anywhere, and it is OK.

can I ask who you are talking about in relation to forgiving you?

All I do know (?) is there is people that do care... but our mind will tell us otherwise - or that is how it worked for me. There are also people who are also only care about themselves. I guess the trick is working out who you can talk to. Regardless, the people here do care about you.

What do you want to stop?

Comforting thoughts to you,

Tim

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Guest...

I hear the sadness, the hurt, the frustration in your words..I’m sorry your struggling so hard...

6 months is a long time to struggling with s/h and mental health....and without feeling cared for..You’re definitely cared for here...

Guest...If you had a broken leg..I’m sure you would get the professionals to re set it, put plaster on it, and take pain meds to stop the pain......

Mental health and S/H...is also an illness, and medical intervention is mostly nearly always needed to help the symptoms, the hurt go away...A lot of people..including myself tried to....well “fix” themselves of this invisible illness...Without very much success...It just kept getting continuously worse....

Talking to your GP..will be the bravest thing that you will ever have to do.....You’re GP can then talk to you about what’s available out their to help you get well again....Maybe your GP will offer you some professional help..with a psychologist...free on a Mental Health Care Plan...Talking to a stranger about your struggles can bring you some relief, and psychologist should also give you some coping ideas to help you throughout your days....Please Guest..if possible can you consider reaching out for help with your Gp....for you, because you are so very much worth it...

Talk hear anytime you feel to Dear Guest...We are here because we do care about you and only want the very best for you..

Sending you my kind and caring wishes..

Grandy..

[ecomama]

Guest_4593 said:+ will they ever forgive me. Im not sure i care, but im not completely selfish..will they care about me. Or just therselbes

Dear Guest

.... the fact that you even mentioned wanting people to forgive you... and that you know you're not completely selfish (which is obvious)... means you have regard for others.

We all make mistakes.
We all make bad choices and we all do stupid things.
Every one.

No one's perfect and some do really bad and evil things and that's not you.

Ofcourse we can be a sounding board. If you share more of what's going on then maybe our feedback can be more specific for you.

Take care
EM