TW: The taste of food

[Gob]

me and food have been fighting it out a lot recently ,im trying to over come my ed and new potholes are forming all over my road . Anyway im not sure how to start,so im just going to type.

why do i detest it ? its almost like the food has perished as i chew it , once delicious and totally binge worthy food now tastes like something spoiled and has the texture of glue ,i can feel my throat close up as i try to swallow it,nausea washing over me and im filled with guilt but mostly disgust ive noticed the more i try to rationalize that its just a sandwich ive eaten half already so why bother why worry? i cant then eat for what then varies from hours to a day ,i just cant stomach it the taste and texture,sight or smell i have no appetite . Even the sight of what once 2 seconds ago smelled ,looked and tasted amazing is now a hot pile of  rancid garbage i sometimes almost feel disturbed by it, i cant look at it ,it feels wrong . i have to leave the place where food is as fast as possible . i cant almost explain because its so strange,so sudden.I ve been trying hard to just push through and eat the dam thing ,to not let my hard work go to waste ,to try to not fall back further in progress.but it just tastes so gross and the will power it takes to force my self to swallow it is ridiculous.sometimes i have to just spit it out . what a power the mind is.what is happening ? the frequency that this occurs is increasing to multiple times a week,i struggle to not starve my self and this is making it harder,making it worse . is this happening because im trying to do better ?has anyone ever had this happen while trying to recover? 

[therising]

Hi Gob

You've definitely got me wondering. With taste, smell, touch (texture), sight and sound all being a part of the food experience, it's definitely a highly sensory experience. The question 'Why am I sensing it differently all of a sudden?'. Could be way off but I'll throw a few possibilities out there

1. You're telling your brain/computer something and it's computing. Kind of like if you tell you're brain 'This food is disgusting' it'll start computing/sensing everything that's off about it, in the finest of details
2. If certain foods are disgusting, say like all food with any form of meat, could you be becoming vegetarian without realising? If you feel the same about cheese and eggs etc, could you be becoming vegan?
3. Are you becoming a texture person? Both my kids (17yo son and especially my 20yo daughter) are texture people. My son refuses to eat bread because of the texture change when it combines with saliva. My daughter can hear the texture of food, especially in another person's mouth. Triggers her nervous system at times
4. Super sensitivity to taste. My son can't tolerate the taste and smell of cheese. If I cut up some cheese and then some lettuce, for example, he can taste the cheese from the cutting board on the lettuce. It's not all in his mind, btw. He doesn't see me doing this, he can just taste anything that's made contact with cheese. My mum can taste the difference between overseas fruit that's traveled for some time in cold storage compared with fresh fruit that hasn't done all that much traveling. The taste of non fresh makes her feel sick. Some folk will only buy what's in season, based on taste

When you consider food critics rely on incredible sensitivity when it comes to how they sense food in all ways, could this be what your brain's suddenly doing, sensing food at expert level? Only one way to find out. Do you feel you could start experimenting with different types of food, in order to see what's repulsive compared with what's fresh and tasty, with ideal texture? Even organic has a different taste to non organic in some cases. You could see if you can taste the difference in the chemical signature.

Could you be developing an ability that feels more like a curse right now? Are you gradually developing the ability to sense only what's good for you?